Democratic Sentinel, Volume 15, Number 27, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 24 July 1891 — Page 4

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f People devote one-third of their time to making others wretched, and another third to complaining that others are not more cheerfal. ; It takes a sailing vessel 125 days to go from Philadelphia to San Fiancisco.” jWell. why isn’t it sensible enough to Bail from some port with go to it ? j Millionaire Rockefeller is suffering from nervous prostration, but no one need worry, Mr. Bockefeller can afford any luxury affected by the richest of the rich. | You can’t judge the number of mourners a man leaves by the number of carriages in his funeral procession, jbut you can judge something of the 1 money he left. “English society is rotten to the , core,” says the Bishop of Manchester. Yet there are nominal Americans whose ©ole object in life is to imitate English society or gain an entrance into it.

If it was not for his c uriosity to know what will happen next in this world, a man would not be so unwilling to die. It is curiosity a 3 much as hope that makes a man interested in to morrow. The motto of a new paper in Georgia, printed in black type on its first page, is this: “If you don’t like it pour it back in the jug.” The editor, in all probability, is not a moonshiner now. Prof. Garner, having discovered that monkeys possess an articulate language, will confer a favor on the world by reporting what the monkeys say of the people who poke canes and parasols into their cages. The nations of the earth see a mighty good example in the way that John Bull and Brother Jonathan settle the seal question. Their heads are level, and both English and American women can continue to wear seal-skin idoaks.

An Atchison girl has a tear bottle that she cries into. When it is fall, she will send it to her lover as a proof of her grief at his absence. It is hoped that it will not become a fad. Girls are too nice and pretty to spoil everything by going around crying into bottles.

A man of the name of Rosander, residence Stockholm, has discovered a new lymph cure for cancer. If it is parallel in its results with Dr. Koch's great discovery it may in time become as certain a cure for paiq and disease as a dose of strychnine, or an ax, or a revolver.

Fate seems to make things fit in nicely. Just as wood was giving out coal was discovered, just as whale oil was about exhausted petroleum was found, and now just as we have about given up hope of being angels Mr. Maxim assures us that his flying machine will soon be ready. The Prince of Wales nor no other man occupying exalted place could have carried on his excesses and held his place in good society in the United States. The public press would have roasted him and served him done, long ago. The English press is doing a good deal of roasting as the case stands.

How much better off is a man at the end of a week than he was at its beginning ? He is just as poor, a little older, a little more tired out, a little more irritable, and a little less hopeful. If he ever sits down and reckons it all up, he is either a hopeful fool or a very brave man if he continues cheerful. A Baltimore surgeon has restored a man’s eye to usefulness after a supposed blindness of three years by putting new lining in the eyelid. He found the material for this on the man’s own person, a process involving much less suffering than cutting samples to match from willing but unfortunate friends. That young minister at St. Catherines, Ontario, who ordered a crying baby to be removed from his church, may not have committed heresy, but he has at least struck a hornet’s nest. And yet there is a precedent. It was Charles Lamb, was it not, who when disturbed by a vociferous infant, suggested the drinking of a toast to Herod?

If you are thinking of getting married, make up your mind to meet a great many troubles and disappointments. It is this making a hero of a plain plug man, and an angel of an ordinary womaa, that is the cause of so much disappointment and divorce. The disilluson process is always a painful one. It is especially so when marriage is the cause of it Saloonkeepers and others who deal in cigars would do well to closely study the law enacted by the last Congress in regard to the sale of cigars. The government law on the subject says cigars must be sold to the customer direct from the properly stamped box. A dealer who takes out a handful of cigars and lays them before the buyer, to chose from, or a saloonkeeper who brings a customer a cigar on a plate or in a glass, makes himself liable to a fine of SIOO. The Rev. Sam Small has been fired out of the Methodist Church by the

unanimous vote of the conference. Thli is about right and proper. A religious privateer has no more busineNT cruising under the honorable flag of a respectable seot than the pirate of the seas has under the ensign of an enlightened nation. Let Small continue his dootrinal piracy under the blaok flag, if continue he must.

Did you ever stop to think how far a touch of ill-nature travels? If you speak crossly to a man, he will show his anger in talking to the next man, who will pass his irritation on to another, and it will keep on traveling, affecting dozens of people, until it strikes some very good-natured person, who will stop it by laughing at it. It would be very pleasant if every man who gets angry could remember thie, but no man who is angry remembers anything but his wrath.

Philadelphia has been a jest foi many a year on account of its slowgoing ways, and there is ground for all the flings that have been made at it. It is only now. when one may see in the east the flush that precedes the dawn of the twentieth century, that a free library is assured to that city. Even this is based upon a bequest, and a bequest of $150,000. If the people of the Quaker City had been given a better oportunitv -to educate themselves, they might not have deposited their money in the Keystone Bank,

A colony of twenty-five Poles sailed from New York recently for their old homes, stating that they were disappointed with the country. They had been told that it was studded with gold mines, and free homes were ready for them with easy ways to make money. They thought they were coming to a sort of Eden, where they had only to pick the fruits. Those who were responsible for their coming ought to pay their way back. This country is not adapted to the easy-going people who do not know what it means to hustle.

The figuring of ocean records has come to be an exact science. The friends of the White Star steamer Majestic are jubilant over the fact that she has made the highest average daily run across the ocean, and that if she had followed the same course from Queenstown traversed by the City of Paris when the latter made her record which still stands, she would have beaten the latter by about fourteen minutes. Persons in haste to make the crossing will doubtless be attracted to the Majestic, but fourteen minutes in 3,090 miles or so is not practically a very serious matter.

How we admire the man who can buy a pound of baef-steak without torturing the busy clerk wPh his reasons for buyiog a pound, and his reasons for buying beef instead of pork or mutton, and the reason he is buying it instead of his wife, and how he likes steak cooked, and when he intends to eat it, and who refrains from telliog his opinions of steak in general. How we admire that kind of man, and how seldom we see him. The average man thinks that no one in the world has anything else to do but to listen to what he intends to do, and his reasons for doing it. How few men there are in the world who know enough to transact their business a 3 speedily as possible.

A lot more foolish people have gone off prying about the icebergs to find and bring home the north pole or a splinter of it. • It may be all right, and laudable, and brave, but the pole isn’t going to do anyone any good if they do find it, and the chances are that some of the members of the expedition will be left up there so stiff and cold in death that they won’t even be able to arise at the forthcoming sound of the final trump. The rest will have frozen ears and chilblains, and things anyhow, and the whole affair is decidedly expensive. If anybody is dying to explore, why don’t he explore around some plaoe where he may find something of value.

More than one brave fellow will go down to his death this summer in river, pond, and sea. In the van went a 13-year-old New York “kid.” Patsy Connery was his name. He “played hookey” from school, took his soul-stirring harmonica, went to the doc'c and made the other “kids” dance. But Patsy’s tunemaker got flirted into the river, and promptly Patsy jumped in after it. But there was mud there, and then the swell of a passing boat banged him against another boat. Then Patsy, coming up the last time, shouted to the “kids” on the dock: “Don’t let ’em take me body home if I drown. It’ll make mudder feel bad. Take me to de undertaker’s shop.” Then Patsy went down, and that was all. A sad story with a moral comes from Aurora, 111., Forty years ago a young lady, now Mrs. King Hammond, and a young man named Welch were engaged to be married. Opposition of parents prevented the match, and Welch went away to Texas, where he has sipce resided. But a continuous correspondence has been kept up, and recently the couple decided to pass their declining days together. Mr. Welch came on to Aurora, accordingly, but when his intended saw him she fainted away and refused to have anything to do with him. Instead of the rosy, athletic youth from whom she bad parted a lifetime before, and of whom she had been dreaming all these years, there stood before her a bald, wrinkled, toothless old man. Perhaps, as Mr. Welch has found it impossible to remain always a young man, it is just as well that he never married his first love.

CHILDREN’S COLUMN.

A DEPARTMENT FOR LITTLE BOYS AND QIRLS. Bomatliing that Will Interest the Juvenile Members of Every Household Quaint Actions and Krl(ht Sayings of Cut# Children. A True Story for the Children. I wonder if the children who read this know what a dreadful thing it is not to have any water to drink? If you do not, sometime when you are working or playing hard and think you would like a drink of water, just try and go without it, and see how thirsty you will be, and every time you think of water you will seem to grow thirstier. Do you know that a great many years ago the doctors used to think if any one had a fever they must not have a drink? Just think how the poor little children had to suffer with the fever burning in their veins and no water to drink. Besides they did not bathe them with something cooling to allay the fever. About seventy years ago, away among the green hills of Vermont, a little bov of three years lay sick of fever. He was very sick, and the doctor looked very grave. Poor little Jesse! How his mother’s heart ached as she bent over the little wasting form of her baby and listened to his continual cry, “water, water,” and dared not give bim any.

You may be sure that her tears often fell on the little hot face. Every day he grew worse until at last his pitiful cry for water ceased, the little parched tongue could no longer move. The Doctor bent over him long and sadly (for he was a father ), then turned to the parents and said, “I can do no more; your baby must die.” A few moments after, some one carried a glass of water to one of the friends gathered around the little bed. Little Jesse could not speak, but his eyes followed the water as long as it was in his sight. The poor mother could bear it no longer. Speaking to the Doctor, she said: “If baby cannot live may I give him some water; he wants it to.” “Nothing will hurt him now,” was the reply; “give him anything he wants.” Quickly the cool water was placed to his parched lins, and although almost past the power to swallow, he drank eagerly and each swallow with more ease; then with a sigh of satisfaction the weary eyes closed—not in death, but in sleep, sweet, blessed sleep. The hot, dry skin grew moist, then the quick, panting breath grew slower and more regular, and they knew that little Jesse was saved, saved by the pure sparkling water, that we thiuk so little about when we have plenty of it; but what a blessing it is when we are wearv and thirsty! I think little Jesse still lives among the green hills of Vermont, where the ■water is so pure and sweet, but he is an old mai now and perhaps little Srandchildren are growing up around im and learning to love the green, rugged hills with their gushing springs, and to hate the poison whisky that the dear old Green Mountain State has driven out. It is very hard to have a fever and not be allowed to quench our thirst with water, but it is worse to be taught to thirst for that which will be a life-long curse to both body and soul. Dear boys and girls, I hope you are all temperance workers and will never learn the cruel whisky thirst, and that you will grow up brave farmer men and women, always working for the right, brave children of the King.— Biss fern Rural.

A Quaint and Curious Toy. The grotesque little brownies which Lewis Carrol called into existence bv the use of his facile pen and pencil may be made to materialize if one have defo fingers and a knack of shaping things. There is needed but a few scraps of brown satin, a piece of stockinet of the same color and some covered bonnet-wire. The round, pot-bellied body is covered with the stockinet; the legs and arms are made of wire: the upturned feet are encased in tiny brown kid shoes, long and pointed at the toes; the jacket is brown satin, and fastened at the chin with tiny gilt buttons. The head is covered with chamois leather, the wide mouth and big ears are painted in water-color; pointed

BROWNIE.

leather ears are fastened to the sides of the head, which is adorned with a little jelly-bag cap. A small bell that tinkles whenever the creature moves is tied about the neck. When the brownie is finished he may be fastened to three or four pinked-out leaves of felt for a pen-wiper or he can be set upon a solid paper-weight, where he looks very funny with one hand raised to his head as if in salute. Fred and Joe. Fred and Joe are boys of the same age. Both have their way to make in the world. This is the way Joe does: When work is before him he waits as

long as 1m can; he hates so to toneh it. Then be does not half do it. He is almost sure to stop before it is done. He does not care if fault is fbnnd. He says, "I can’t help it,” or *1 don’t care.” Fred’s way is not the same. He goes straight to his work and does it as soon as he can and as well as he can. He never Blights his work for play, though he loves play as well as Joe does. If he does not know how to do a piece of work well, he asks some one who does know, and then he takes care'to remember. He says: “I never want to be ash med of my work.” Which boy, do you think, will make a man to be trusted ?

THE RACE TOUT.

Who He Is aud How He Works and Picks the Winners. “Hello, tout! s “That’s right. Call me by my name. I’m a tout. But look here, do you know there is a wrong impression as to what a tout is? Well, there is. People think a tout is one who hangs around the pool-room at a race track and waits for suckers. To advise one man to bet on Bohemian Lad, and another man to bet on Grass Widow, and

another to place his money on Biddy McPhee, and so on till he gets a man to bet on every race. He marks them all, and when the race is over, and, for insance, Bug Holliday, wins the race, he lays for the man who bet on the Bug, and when the lucky plunger draws his money the fellow demands $1 or $5 for giving his ‘friend’ the wanning tip. “Well, that is what most people think is a tout, but it’s all wrong. A tout is a fellow who does more work at a race track at night than at day. He sleeps there all night, on the grass or ou the roof of a shed, and gets up at 3 o’clock in the morning and waits for the trainers and jockeys to exercise the horses that are to run that afternoon. The tout thus finds out the exaot condition of each horse. If Long John Beillv has been a favorite in the pools the night before and does not show up well in the early morning practice the tout will not bet on him, but will place his money on Tony Mullane, Lefty Marr, King Kelly, Chris Green, Joe Good, or whichever horse shows up the best in the trial. The tout always has a few dollars to bet himself, and, in the long run, seldom quits loser, for he follows the races from place to place and keeps posted all the time. I’ve been a tout several years now and I find it better business than carrying samples. ” “Are you doing well at this meeting?” “Not very. So far everybody, including the touts, seem to be getting the bad end of this meeting. I’m broke now, and you'll save a life by inviting me to take a drink.”

VERY EXPENSIVE ANIMALS.

A Do* an-I a Frig 11« at Represent $50,000 Each, Owned by a New Yorker. The average life of a treasury note or silver certificate was formerly three years. Now r , with improved paper and

less handling, it is three and a half to four years. When these notes die and aie redeemed at the Uni'ed States Treasury they are macerated thoroughly, and the doughy pulp thus produced is fashioned into vaiious odd forms. ; for sale by the attendants in the macerating room as curios. A counterfeit presentment of an alleged dog, the property of a New York newspaper

A WONDERFUL PURP.

man, is made of the pulp of $50,000 worth of treasury notes, and there is aho a slab-sided frog, owned by the same man, which represents a similar amount of destroyed notes. In the macerating room of the Treasury Building $28,000,000 are leduced to pulp in

a single day. This pulp mill has con- | sumed $4,000,000,000—four times as much as the last Congress and is still open for business. The redeemed bills are brought

in, and. under the supervision of a committee of three, representing the Secretary, Treasurer and Comptroller of the Treasury, are put into the mill 1 and sealed with three great padlocks. After the first process of destruction the same committee opehß the mill and the shreds are turned into a steam vat. I out of which they come in the shape of a gray, formless pulp, which is sold to the paper manufacturers. Fridat in Presidential records: Inaugurated on Friday: J. Q. Adams, Pierce and Garfield. Born on Friday: ' Washington, Madison, Monroe, Pierce and Hayes. Died on Friday: Tyler, Polk, Pietee and Arthur. Lincoln ; wis assassinated on Friday.

WEALTHY ENG[?]GH TO WOO.

THE ARIZONA KICKER.

Western Journalism Has Its Annoy anoeL We Did It. —Bill Burbanks, the mule-whacker ou the other side of the creek, is trying to make a great mystery of the fact that he got a dose of bird-shot in this town the other evening. He says that some one certainly attempted to assassinate him as he was riding along Cheyenne street at midnight, and he thinks of offering a reward of S2OO for the arrest of the wretch. William is simply playing the pub-

WE PEPPERED HIM.

lic, but he can’t play us. We had just stretched out on our cot Thursday night, and the hour was about 12, when Bill came aloDg on his old dromedary. We heard him cussing while he was yet a long ways off. When he reached the office he dismounted and hunted up a club, and was about to smash in a window when we peppered him with a handful of fine shot kept on hand for such emergencies. We hardly believed any of them would get through the buckskin and dirt, but it seems they did, and he had to have a doctor to pick them ont. The best tiling Bill can do is to keep shet. He attempted a smart trick and got left, and there isn’t a man this side of Tombstone who would have cared if all the shot had gone clean through him and his dromedary, too. Call Him Off. —lf the so-called Major Skinner, who has loafed around this town for the last six months, has any friends who have his welfare at heart, they will call him off the perch. It seems the Major has been laying his pipes for office, and that our article of two weeks ago, asking him where he stole his last cow, has somewhat clouded his piospects. He now threatens to shoot us on sight, and was seen at the Postoffice yesterday yith a big revolver belonging to Luke Higgins.

We regret these little annoyances but if they must be met we are not the man to shrink from the task. Tomorrow afternoon, after our first form goes to press and we work off 200 auction bills, we shall strap on our gun and take a walk. If Major Skinner has departed for Tucson, he may live to be a hundred years old; if he hasn’t, he will make No. 10 in our private graveyard. This is official, and comes light from headquarters. Poor Old Man !—The wheezy, brok-en-backed press owned by our esteemed contemporary fell to pieces the other -day as he was getting ready to work ;his outside form, and as aoop as we heard of the accident we tentiered him the use of ours. He gratefully accepted, but, alas, no act of kindness or generosity can change the leopard’s spots! His circulation, while given as 3,550, is in reality only 280. He hadn’t the manhood about him to bring along his 280 sheets of white paper and depend on our honor, but he hires a cart and drives over with two whole bundles, and then pretends he has run short! Two men were kept hard at work all day, and hundreds of sheets of paper recklessly wasted, that the old hypocrite and falsifier might flatter himself that we were deceived. We don’t like such men. We can’t believe they are an ornament to a growing Western town.

No Boom.— We understand that several real estate firms in this town have combined to get up a boom and make things jump. In fact, they offered us a half-page ad. for this week, but we didn’t take it. As an individual we might cheat a man from Omaha at poker, but as an editor we can’t be hiied to help swindle our subscribers. In order to offset the machinations of this syndicate we wish to say: We have got the fag-end of one railroad here and neither want nor will ever be able to get anything more. Society is not cultivated. Such a thing as a toothbrush or a volume of poems found on a man here would hang him. The land around the town is so poor that it takes nine feet of it over a dead mule to hold the carcass down. It is not a trade-center. We have the Digger Indian on three sides of us, and a large family of coyotes ou the fourth. The climate wobbles all over creation, makiug the demand for buffaloskin overcoats aud linen dusters about equal and mighty steady. It is not a sanitaiium for invalids. If the climate didn’t kill ’em, our doctors would. This is about all, but enough to put our subscribers on their guard and to clear our conscience if our advice is not taken. Now, gentlemen of the combination, go ahead with your boomlet !—A’etc York World.

Cr[?]mation Popular Among the Japs.

Cremation flourishes in Japan. Tokio has six crematories, in which the bodies of at least one-third of the dead are burned. In 1884 11,023 of the 34.437 persons who died were cremated, aud since burial in the city was forbidden the number has been increased. According to the style of cremation the piice is $3.75, $2, or sl. Sixty-six pounds of wood, which costs approxi mately 25 cents, suffices for the burning of a body in three hours. A man who gets the mitten is apt t» be guilty of contempt of court.

THE LEANING TOWER.

A Proposed Building to Illustrate- Engineering skill Some mouths ago a proposition wasmade to the Worlu’s Fair Directory to build a leaning tower as one of the attractions for 1893. There have been many inquiries as to what the projector of the tower proposed to do, and we publish his own description of the proposed building. This engineering novelty is a massive tower having an elevation of 225 feet, about 70 feet square, and boldly leaning 100 feet from the perpendicular. The entire structure is of metal, principally steel, weighing about 500 tons above foundation, and of novel cantilever construction that affords all requirements of stability. It will be built to safely sustain a load of 160,000 pounds on floor of the story. The framework is of steel truss construction, forming a large cantilever of enormous strength and ligidity, which combines for support a superstructure of metal. The accompanying diagram, showing truss and foundation, will readily explain the principle of construction. It will be observed that the tower frame and superstructure as a whole resemble the letter L, making in principle an immense unyielding L, of which the lower part acts as a foot or offset to counter the lean of superstructure. Depth of superstructure, 48 feet; area, 165x115 feet. The construction of foundation is chiefly of plate-riveted

THE LEANING TOWER.

iron girder work imbedded in concrete, which forms a solid bed about eighteen feet deep. This girder-concrete foundation has the characteristics of being continuous in structure and rigid throughout, and is especially designed for building on yielding substrata, such as the deep clay of Chicago. On the girder-work there are bolted steel bearing plates, and on these plates the massive truss foot of the cantilever rests. This foot at left side will be attached to metal parts of bed by large steel pins and eye-bars, but these connections will not be brought into play unless the tower is heavily loaded. In the superstructure three lines of trusses constitute the main supports, two from sides of tower, the third has a middle position, and a lateral truss system braces them together. The walls of the tower are comparatively light, being simply a framing of small-sized aDgle-iron attached to the trusswork, aad having a facing of embossed sheet metal. The exterior will be painted a dark terracotta color. At Bologna, Italy, there is an old tower called the Garisenda. It is 130 feet high, eighteen feet square, and eight feet out of plumb. A better known tower of this character is the Campanile of Pisa. It was built in the twelfth century, and is a stone structure fifty feet in diameter, 179 feet high, and leans thirteen feet out of perpendicular. The leaning of this tower was due to a poor foundation while building; the tower had but reached one-third of its intended height when the foundation of one side began to sink and incline the work. The masonry was then strengthened with iron clamps which have kept the structure intact. By this accidental departure from the builder’s aim, what at first might have been a poor reflection of his work, made the tower of Pisa famous. In building the cantilever of L tower for exhibition purposes it will make the greatest leaning structure in the world and be unique in many particulars. Besides affording an attractive sight for visitors it will present a novel display of the application of metal to all building purposes. It will take eight months to build this structure, which includes shop work and erection. The cost will be about $5,000,000.

An Inspiration of the Honeymoon.

“That was an awful fate that befell Lot’R wife,” said Mrs. Hunnimune, looU >g up fron her Bible. “it was,” said her husband; “but it could not have befallen you.” “Why not? I would just have been as likely to look behind.” “But you couldn’t have turned into a pillar of salt.” “ Why not ?” “You would have turned into a pillar of sugar.” And yet there are some pessimistic pe >ple who contend that marriage is a failure. While Queen Victoria was in western France returning from Grasse, recently, a telegram awaited her at one of the stations where a halt was made. The postmisti 63s refused to give it into anybody’s hands but the rightful recipient, and all the diplomacy of the royal train was put in action to induce this zealous functionary to waive rules and regulations in favor of the Queen of England. Madame only yielded to the pressing solicitations of General Ponsonbv and a secretary of the British embassy. i

The king of all the lobsters was caught off Monhegan, Me., the other day. He was thirty inches long and wfilched fourteen pounds.