Democratic Sentinel, Volume 14, Number 42, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 14 November 1890 — Disgrace vs. Respectability. [ARTICLE]

Disgrace vs. Respectability.

Society Bud —Oh, it’s perfectly terrible, and we re all ready to die of mortification. Just think, my own sister the wife of a mere nobody—never belonged to our set at all. She eloped with him last night, leaving a note saying that before morning she ’ would be the wife of one she loved better than life Itself. Friend —Mercy! I hope it wasn’t that ugly old fellow I saw coming in here yesterday. “No; her lover was young and handsome. That homely old bald-headed, toothless wreck you saw is the Count Groggie. ” “That creature, a count?” “Yes, a real count. He has not only a title, but he is rich; and as soon as I can conquer my aversion to the old fool, I’m going to marry him. ” — New York Weekly. AMANwhoIMU practiced medicine for forty years ought to know salt from sugar ; read what he says: Tolbdo, 0., Jan. 10,1887. Messrs F. J. Cheney <t Co.—Gentleman—l have been in the general practice of mediefne for most forty years, and would say that in all my practice and experience have never seen a ' preparation that I could prescribe with as much ! confidence of success as I can Hall’s Catarrh ! Cure, manufactured by you. Have prescribed i it a great inany times ana its effect is wonderful, and would say in conclusion that I have yet to find a case of Catarrh that it would not cure, if they would take it according to directions. Yours truly, L. L. GOBSUCH, M. D., tiffice, 215 Summit St. We will give SIOO for any case of Catarrh that cannot be cured with Hail’s Catarrh Cure, ' Taken internnllv. F. J. CHENEY & Co., Props., Toledo, O. 49~501d by Druggists, 75c. 1 A New York grocer, who recently took a trip to Coney Island, was sitting on the beach fooling in tbe sand with a small shovel. A friend seeing him stopped and bade him the time of day. “Howdy,” replied the grocer, absent- > mindedly, taking up a shovelful of sand. ' “How many pounds of sugar did you say?” i Little Alphonse XIII. of Spain is ] four and a half years old. He has a pro- i digious appetite, and it is necessary to ; watch him carefully at table to prevent i him from gormandizing. « After tbe Arizonians got through 1 with him the coroner cut him down and I sat on him. The verdict was, from the ; appearance of the rope, “knot dead.” Polar beats—the fellows Who are striving in vain to depress the price of i ICA-