Democratic Sentinel, Volume 14, Number 27, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 25 July 1890 — PITH AND POINT. [ARTICLE]

PITH AND POINT.

Jokks about plumbers should always be well leaded. The land of the flea and the home ot the slave—Cuba. A bar a avis: “Your fare, sir,” said the conductor. "I have the reputation of being so,” said the umpire. “James, I am cleaning house, so be a good fellow and beat the carpet as usual.” “No, I think 11l shake it this year.” “Papa," said a talkative lifcels rirl. “am I made of dust?” “No, my child, if yon were you would dry up once in a while.” Mr. Staid —And is Miss Gigglegiggle well educated? Mrs. McFad— Educated? I should say so. Why, the ribbons on her graduating dress cost over fifty dollars. Little boy—Uncle, wworkn r k you tell us a story ? Genial Uncle—Certainly my boy. What kind of a story? “Oh, any kind only so it’s true. Tell us about Jack and the Beanstalk.” Mrs. F angle— What is Mrs. Gadabout’s reputation as a charitable woman based upon? Mr. Fangle (from behind the newspaper)—Upon her willingness to. attend to other people’s- business without charge. “Want any help?” he asked ©f the grocer. “Well, I dunno. f How many tomatoes can you put .into a quart measure?” “I can put five, but can make four do.” “I guess I dbn’t need yon. Three is our limit here.” Teacher —Did Columbus know that he had discovered a new continent? Class—No, he thought it was India. Teacher—Correct. Why did he think he had found India? Bright boy—l s’pose it was ’cause the inhabitants was Indians. A slight advantage: First little chicken—You need not be so stuck upj You are nothing but an incubator chick, anyhow. Second little chicken —l’ve got more freedom than you have. My mother never knows when I am out. A. —So that is your wife. Splendid woman; you ought to be proud. B.— Solum; only she is a bit thoughtless. For instance, I sent her the other day with a heap of money to buy me a dozen shirts, and what do you think she brought home instead?—a new bonnet!

THE DE3ERTER I saw no wrong in kissing him, He seemed so true, so tender ; I saw no harm in woodland walks W ith him for a defender. Ah, me! I did not think it then That for that very reason He’d quite reruse to marry me. And boast of all his treason. All right 1 I proved an alibi The day they s i-y I kissed him; And now lie’s lost his fortune 1 am very glad I missed him. -Tom Hall, in Muitsay’s Weekly. She— Yes, Harry, I confess, you have awakened in mv heart the tender throbbings of a first and only love. Her young brother—Hello, caught ver! Gimme a quarter, or I’ll tell. She— Tommy, go away, that’s a good boy, and I’ll give you ten cents to morrow. Tommy—Oh, no, you don’t. That’s what you said when 1 caught Tom Turner kissing you last week, and you h&veirt paid me yet.