Democratic Sentinel, Volume 14, Number 11, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 4 April 1890 — Page 5 Advertisements Column 4 [ADVERTISEMENT]

My son, deal vith men who advertise. You will never lose tj it. Benjamin Franklin. Pol B. The transition h > n tong, lingering and ya'.nftil si i." to roMei heal u a aks an epoch i I'te life of the Indi vidual. Buc a r*ni. kable ev<> ut is treasure J iu m* r ,• tt nJ the agency wherebv :t ;u.,u tie.dih bad been attained is >tcf".lly bles p<l Berne it is that so iuu<*h is beaid in praise of Electric Bht'rs So rautiy feel they owe th-’r restorntio to health to tue ue of the Greer Alter atlve and Tonic If you are troubled with any diseaso of Kidneys, Liver or Stomach, -f tong or short standing, you will surely find relief by use of Electric Bitter* Sold at 50c and «1 ver bottle at F B Meyri’a Drug Store » FOR SALE OR TRADE. For sale or| trade, for town or country property, either in Jasper or Newton county, two farms of 160 acres each, in Ne - braska. These are homestead farms,selected by actual settlers. They will make good homes and will be sold on easy terms, or traded for property in Rensslaer or surrounding country, at fair value. Call and see or write to. Ji H Willey. Rensselaer aid.

SALESMEN V WANTED 1 ■ to cnuvasß for Bhe sale of NPrsery Stock. Steady employment guaranteed. SALARY AND EXPENSES paid to successful men- Apply at once stating e ge. Mention this paper CHASE BROTAERS COMPANY, , Rochester, N Y Alb ongh I do not do an “exclusive cash business,” and believe in accommodating when needy 1 de fy competition in prices when one has tue money. R. Fendig. ' ▲ Vain Search. Yellowly—“Why, Brownly, how bad you Ipok this morning. Did you sleep any fast night?" Brownly—“ Not a wink." “Anybody sick?" “I am." “What’s the matterP” “Well, you see my wife has been in the habit of going through my pockets at night, and I thought what was good for the gander was good for the goose, so after she fell asleep last night I arose and set out to go through her pocket." “Get anything?" “No. Searched the dress over and over, spent the whole night at it, but couldn’t find the pocket.” Equal to the Occasion. The following conversation took place in a clothing dealer's store in Boston the other day: Customer—“ You say that the price of the coat is thirteen dollars. Don’t you know that thirteen is an unlucky number? Make it twelve, and I’ll owe you one.’’ Dealer —“No. no, mine frendtx Off tirteen vas an onlucky numbers, 1 make id fourteen, und I owe you von." Me WaadMfe Jokes, like poems, are worth all the mere I* they happen to be sensible. Clara—What a terrible noise that wofoa makes! f eorff* Yea, it’s dreadful, isn’t it! Clara—What makes it groan so? George—Why, ft is filled with green

A MAN IN THE HOUSE, laterestiag Information Which Was Imparted at 1 O’clock in the Morning. They say that when John H. Oberly, tlw “bishop,” was a younger man than he is now he was an irrepressible joker. A member of the Jefferson Club, who claims to know what he is talking about, tells the St. Louis Republic that John was born at just 1 o'clock in the morning, and relates the following circumstance concerning the twenty-ffrst anniversary of that event The entire household was asleep, excepting, presumably, young Oberly. At a few minutes after 1 o’clock he went to the door of each bed-room, and with feigned cautiousness aroused the sleeper, saying: “There’s a man in the house.” Presently everybody was up and half dressed. Some ventured out into the halls, others stood timidly in their half-open doorways, while still others remained out of sight behind locked doors. “Come out here,” said John to those who had not left their rooms; •‘I tell you there’s a mpa in the house” Finally he succeeded in getting everybody into the hall, where the group stood half afraid, half ashamed to show fear. “Where is he?” said one. “Here I am,” answered John. “I am a man. I am a man. I was twenty-one fifteen minutes ago.” Artificial Lege. At least 10,000 of the pensioners receive artificial legs of the Government free of charge. These legs are renewed every five years. Next year will be the time for the renewal.