Democratic Sentinel, Volume 14, Number 9, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 21 March 1890 — Page 8

HOME AND HAPPINESS. How h»ppy is the home Wherein contentment dwell*— , There labor’s restless loom > / The Bong of ooncord swells; There comfort proud presides <4 O’er fortne’s scanty store. And gladness calmly glides Unceasng through the door. How happy is the shpere Where love supremely reign*— There faith forestalled fear, And joy precludeth pains; There pleasures crown the day In sweet and swift increase, And heaven spreads o'er the way The golden arch of peace. —Howard N. Fuujk*

UNCLE THOMAS.

The city marshal of a small town in Indiana having been informed that he had a “bad expositor” in the town lock-up, and that I could see him if I so desired, it was only natural that curiosity should be aroused. I went over, to find a clean-shaven, respecta-ble-looking man in broadcloth, and when we had been left alone, on pretense that he “wanted to consult legal authority,” he offered me a cigar, crossed his legs, and complacently re marked; “Well, the bottom has dropped out at last and I’m durned glad of it. I han’t felt a bit happy for the last three months. Look at mel D’ye s’pose a decent tramp would recognize or have anything to do with me, togged out in this fashion P Regular broadcloth, this suit is, and I’ve got on a regular undershirt, same as governors wear, and regular socks and linen collars. Is it any wonder I haven’t had a good night’s sleep in long weeks, and that my liver is out of order and my system running down?” “You are not what you seemP” I observed, by way of encouragement. “You’ve hit the bull’s-eye, old man! Say, it’s too funny for anything when I think it over. Sometimes Pve laughed till my sides ached, and tnen, again, I’ve bin so lonesone that it seemed as if I must fly.” “Go on with the tale.” He noted the time by a new silver watch, settled himself back on the bench, and began: “Down here about three miles lives an old maid nigh on to 50 years old. She owns the farm and a man cousin of hers works it. One night last spring I struck the place for a cold supper, and the door was hardly open before Martha flung her arms about my neck and hugged and kissed me until Jim, the cousin, had to pull her off.” “Mistaken identity,” I remarked. “Exactly. Seems that they had an Unole Thomas off somewhere, «.nri that he was supposed to be rich and eooentrio, and that a fortune-teller had told ’em he would come along in disguise. They tumbled to me for the old eooentrio, and it wasn’t over two toots of the whistle before I was onto the racket. They didn’t ask any hard questions, but stuffed me full of good things, piled me into a feather bed, kissed me good night, and that was the beginning of a downward career which has landed me where I am. Last night, when I struck this jail, I began to feel at home for the first time in twelve weeks. If I only had my old duds my happiness would be complete.” “Did it take them three months to find that you were not their Uncle Thomas P” “It did. They thought I was deceiving them about my riches and testing them to see if they were worthy. They bought me this watch, clothes, a cane, and a lot of other stuff, and I was fed on the fat of the land. I gained thirty-two solid pounds to prove it. I used to long to get back into the old duds, and to sleep under a straw stack, and steal apples, and encounter bull-dogs, but I had to play my part. I knew that I had a soft thing, and prudence warned me to hang on to it.” “How did they discover your Identity?” “Well, she went off to a neighbor’s, and Jim was working in a back lot. Along came three of the boys, and I was so glad to see ’em that I hugged each one in my arms and then invited ’em into the housa They had oaten and drank their fill and gone before I heard anything drop. I told ’em who I was and what a snap I had, and I’ll be hanged if Jim, who had come up for water, didn’t hear it all. He posted right off to town, got the officers, and here I am. I want you to do me a favor.” “WellP” “They’ll hev to turn me loose, for I han’t broken no law. I want to send these clothes back to Martha and Jim, and I want you to get me something more in keeping with my station—something an old tramp will feel at home in. I’ve been guilty of deception, but 1 really couldn’t help myself. It’s the first time I ever put on clean shirts once a week, washed my face once a day, and tried to sleep respectably, and I promise you it shan’t happen again. It’s human nature to err, you know.” I arranged at the hotel for some old clothes and carried them over, and as I untied the bundle “Uncle Thomas” said: “Most too respectable, but I’ll doctor ’em a little. A thousand thanks to you. By this time to-morrow I’ll be ten miles away, dodging the dog at the gate and working the otuk door for cold vittles. Won’t it seam good! Won’t I roll up into a ball and have a •olid old snooM in some fence corner BUrMb».bc.n compiled to «o,W

of here all dressed up and under false pretenses, and it would have taken me a month to convince the boys that I was born to the purfesh, and loved it for itself alone.”

Remarkable Time Plece.

A jeweler at Sulsun, Cal., has made a clock that will run 480 days without winding a seoond time.

A Small Deer.

A remarkable little animal has been added to the London zoo. It is a deer, though in size it is a trifle larger than a full-grown cat. The cloven hoofs proclaim its position in the world beyond a doubt but it has no horns, In the male two long canine teeth project from the upper lip, and these perhaps serve in their stead.

Money in a Tree's Heart.

Oscar Tuttle, of Santa Cruz, CaL, was splitting kindling wood when he taokled a large pleos of redwood. He found a 5-cent pieoe of 1850 lodged in the center of the limb. It was blackened by the sap.

The best Sewing Machine in the market is the Eldredge. vOa il the residence of Mrs. J. W. Me Ewen, Agent, Rensselaer, Ini Loose's Ked Clover Rile Re medv, is a positive specific for a forms of the disease. Blind. Bleeding.ltebing, Ulcerated andProtrud Ing Piles. Price 50c. For sale by Long & Eger. J. E. Spitler, at the P. O. book store takes,subscription f for standard magazines and papers, without extra charge. Mew backgrounds, new camera, ntw lialustrade, new burnisher andrew ideas! Now is the time to " those photos taken you were us bout. espectfully, J. A. Sharp Jay W. Williams has three large rooms packed with furniture in great variety. No old or second nand atock. Many articles for the holidays is included in the display now open for inspection. body respectfully invited to call. Services at the Baptist Church Sugday school every Sunday at 9:30a. m. On the 2d and 4th Sundays in each month, preaching at 10:45 a. m. and at the usual hour in the evening. Covenant meeting, Saturday before the second Sunday in each month, at 2:00 P. M. Prayer meeting every Wednesday evening. All are cordially invited to al* tend any of these services. U. M. McGuire.

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“ How fat I’d get if I had one.” FREE—Get from your dealer free, the $4 Book. It haa handsome pictures and valuable information about horses. Two or three dollars for a 5/a Horse Blanket will make your horse worth more and eat less to keep warm. ( 5/A Five Mile .. , ) 5/A Boss Stable Ask for ) 5/A Electric ( 5/A Extra Test 30 other styles at prices to suit everybody. If you ean’t get them from your dealer, write us. 5/A *0 RSt BLANKETS ARE THE STRONGEST. NONE GENUINE WITHOUTTHE 5/A LABEL Manufd by Wm. Ayres & Sons, Phllada., who make the fame’s Horse Brand Baker Blankets. Buy Im ui MVOrswa Trees Parties wishing Fruit Trees will do Well to examine my Nursery Stock at Luther Ponsler’s farm, 2 miles north and one-half mile east of Rensselaer. 1 have over 5,000 Apple, 1,000 Cherry, and 400 Pear—all choice varieties. These trees are in a thrifty a id healthy condition. I also have the agency for the Greening Bros. Nursery at Monroe, one of the best Nurseries m the State. All stock bought of me guaranteed true to name, and insured for one year where properly taken care of at the following priees: Apples— Home Trees —2oc. “ Michigan 30c. Crebs, 30c.; Cherry, 30c., Ac. H. B. MURRAY.

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