Democratic Sentinel, Volume 13, Number 51, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 10 January 1890 — It Will Ever Be Thus. [ARTICLE]

It Will Ever Be Thus.

A citizen of Harlem who was approaching the railroad depot, followed by a dog, halted and picked up a stone and flung it at the canine with the exclamation : “Yon good-for-nothing cur, but I’d like to knock your head off!” Just then a man came down a side street followed by another dog, and halted to say: “I’ve got another just such cur here. He isn’t worth his weight in soap grease.” “I’ll poison mine this very night!” “And I’m going to throw* mine under the locomotive.” “Say,” said the second man, after a moment’s thought, “call your cur up here and let us get ’em to fighting.” “Good idea. Here, Jep—Jep—Jep! Come here, doggie!” The dog cautiously approached, and as the two animals began growling and walking around each other a sudden “Stubov!” brought a climax, and they began fighting. Both men laughed, but it wasn’t a minute before the first man, whose dog was underneath, kicked the dog on top. “Hold on, now. Give my dog a fair show!” shouted the other. “He’s the biggest!” “No, he aint! Don’t you kick my dog again!” “I’m a good mind to kick his owner !” “I’d like to see you try it ?” “I can do it!” “You’re a liar.” And with that they began whaling away at each other with the greatest vigor, ending after five ninutes in a draw. Meanwhile the dogs had quit and disappeared. “I allow no one to kick my dog,” gasped one, and he wiped at his bloody nose. “And no living man can call me a liar,” growled the other, as he held his black eye. “I’ll see you agaiu.” ’’And I’ll see you.” —New York Sun.

“Isn’t it lonely here, George ? Did you ever know anything so still V” “Oh, ves. Once.” “When was that?” “I hired a plumber once to do a day’s work for me, and he never move** from morning to night.”