Democratic Sentinel, Volume 13, Number 44, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 22 November 1889 — Squire Jeffs’ Dilemma. [ARTICLE]

Squire Jeffs’ Dilemma.

Squire Jeffs, for many years a Justice of the Peace in a county of Maine, was a wealthy but somewhat ignorant farmer. One day, in the most pressing season of harvesting, he was summoned to attend at the trial of some petty dispute between two of his neighbors. The evidence was long and somewhat tedious, and the Squire had more than once exhibited symptoms of impatience. At length, when it was finished, and the village lawyer had risen and delivered a preliminary “H’m” or two, he burst forth: “I don’t want none of your pleading about it! I know how it is, jest like a book! Besides, it’s getting late, and I want to go home and look after my men. I can decide it now as well as any time.” On being convinced that such a course would not be according to law, he yielded reluctantly. The argument did not tend to edify him much, for when they were finished, he exclaimed : “There —it’s jest as I knew it would be! The thing was as clear as daylight before, and now you’ve gone and mixed it up so, I’ll be hanged if I know how to fix it!”