Democratic Sentinel, Volume 13, Number 26, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 19 July 1889 — Joke About Gen. Harney. [ARTICLE]

Joke About Gen. Harney.

The recent death of Gen. Harney, the oldest general in the United States army, justifies the republication of the following good story about the old hero. It occurred at Camp Yerde, Texas, where Harney was in command of the post: He was an intensely dignified officer, and if there was one thing he detested more than another it was undignified haste. One evening, just as he was about to hold dress parade, he perceived that he had forgotten his handkerchief, and as the weather was very hot, he said to his orderly: “Go to my quarters quick and bring my handkerchief. ” The orderly touched his. cap and started for the quarters, several hundred yards distant. After he had proceeded a short distance, remembering that there was no time to lose, he broke into a trot. “See that scoundrel running as if the Indians were after him. If there is anything I hate it is to see a soldier running instead of marching properly. Here, my man,” continued Harney to another soldier, “go after man and tell him I say to walk, d—n him!” The second soldier started after the first, but as the first one kept on running, the second one saw his only chance to deliver the message was to hurry up, so he, too, broke into a run. To say that Harney swore is to use but a mild, expression. “Here, Sergeant, go after that man and tell him if he doesn’t stop running I’ll hang' him up by the thumbs.” The sergeant started out in a brisk walk, but as his predecessor had a good start, he, too, began to run as hard as he could. “If all three of the scoundrels ain’t running like jack rabbits!” ejaculated Harney. “I’ll show ’em.” And tucking his sword under his arm, he started in pursuit as fast as he could run, but suddenly remembering his dignity he came to a halt and walked stiffly and slowly back to the place where the dress parade was to come off. —Texas Siftings.