Democratic Sentinel, Volume 10, Number 37, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 15 October 1886 — Extracted from History. [ARTICLE]

Extracted from History.

Gen. Howe once started to lead 3,000 .British soldiers up a hill called Bunker’s. They got about half-way up, when they all stopped, and the General turned to reprove them by saying: “Gentlemen, England expects every man to come up to the rack!” He would have said this had he not found an impediment in his stomach in the shape of a two-ounce ball of lead. On further examination he discovered that each one of the 3,000 was similarly affected. It appeared to be epidemic and chronic. They were not wasted by disease, but seemed to have lost interest in the proceedings. No one even made a motion to adjourn. It subsequently got out that they were all dead. Capt. James Wadsworth once sat down in Hartford, Connecticut, to confer with Sir Edmund Andros, an ambassador from King James. Shortly after he discovered that Sir Edmund was not only an ambassador from a king, but that he also held four of them, while he had no less than two himself, which produced a feeling of misplaced confidence in that particular diplomatic circle; whereupon the Captain turned down the gas and made way*vitb the cold deck and hid it in a tree, which was ever after known as Charter Oak, and furnished wood for all snuff-boxes and gold-headed canes presented to Governors from 1656 to 1876, when the racket was called in by the Government and laid on the shelf with the wooden spoons carved out of the Mayflower. A pleasing little incident is related of Horace Greeley which not only shows his love for his fellow men but his great b> illiancy at reply and self-pos-session during a trying ordeal in which scores of editors fail every day. His shoemaker once came to him as he sat in the Tribune office and said: “ Mr. Greeley, I have been your shotmaker for forty years.” “Well, yes, that’s about the size of it.” “Now, I want your advice. I have presented my bill over six hundred times. I have given up getting anything out of it. I fear that I cannot live to take it all on subscription, even if you continue to follow your presont course of sending me the daily, triweekly, weekly, and almanac. My family needs money and something must be done; therefore I ask your advice.” Horace slowly reached for a copy of “What I Know of Farming,” bound in paper, while a light as of inspiration lit up his eye, softened by a faint touch of sadness and compassion in his chin whiskers, and said, his voice trembling with emotion: “Go West, young man, go West and grow up with the country!” —Estelline Bell. “Hello!” we heard one man say to another the other day. “I didn’t know you at first; why! you look ten years younger than you did when I saw you' last”' “I feel ten years younger,” was the reply. “You know I "used to be under the weather all the time and gave up expecting to be any better. The doctor said I had consumption.’ I was terribly weak, had night-sweats, cough, no appetite, and lost flesh. I saw Dr. Pierce’s ‘Golden Medical Discovery’ advertised, and thought it would do no harm if it did no good. It has cured me. I am a new man because I am a well one.”