Democratic Sentinel, Volume 9, Number 4, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 20 February 1885 — Senatorial Soap-Eating. [ARTICLE]

Senatorial Soap-Eating.

Krtn>a-i lily Twin >< Not long ago Garland hit Butler p.ietty hard That is to say, he got a very good'one on him, and Butler laid for the C'e nat o r from Arkansas. — Knowing Garland’s fondness for candy, he procured some caramels and also borne cubes of brow n soap, which, when wrapped in their tissue paper precisely resembled to the eye the carameis. Butler knew that if he tried to put the cubes of soap off on Garland he wo’d fail, as the latter was, of course on the alert, so far as he was concerned. So Voorhees, of Indiana, who sits next to Garland, was chosen for the confederate. Said Butler to Voorhees: ‘Here are two genuine caramels. These others are cubes of soap, eat the genuine caramels, put your trust in Providence, and say nothing.’ Voorhees did as he was told. Garland observed the cubes on the desk, and saw that Voorhees was eating something with an evident relish. ‘Hello,’said Garland. ‘What

are you eating?’ ‘l’ ve got a cold and I’m eating some candy,’ replied Voorhees, very much absorbed in some papers in his hand. Garland looked at the counterfeits wistfully for a moment. ‘Hum/ he said fiually, as he picked one up. ‘l’ve got something of a cold myself,’ and he popped the piece of soap in his mouth. There was a crunching of his jaws, and he saw he was caught. Voorhees watched him out of the tail of his eye, as did a dozen others of the old boys sitting around. Garland knew he was under ffre, and he determined not to flinch. After chewing his soap for a moment he looked up at Voorhees with the inimitable air of innocent earnestness that is characteristic of him, and softly asked: ‘Do you eat many of these things when you have a cold?’ And Garland kept on chewing, an almost imperceptible strip of lather formed on his lips. Voorhees became alarmed and went to Butler. ‘That fellow is actually eating that stuff. Why, it will kill him, won’t it?’ ‘No-o-o-o/ drawlea Butler. ‘I don’t reckon anything will kill that man.’ . Garland was game. He finished his soap, and no man could say he looked as if he didn’t enjoy it.