Democratic Sentinel, Volume 8, Number 40, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 31 October 1884 — A Winning Argument. [ARTICLE]

A Winning Argument.

“What will you do fur .us poor farmers es you git elected to the Legislature?” asked a granger of a candidate who rode up to his cabin as soon as the granger called oil - his fourteen dogs. “Oh! there are plenty of things I’ll do. Dor instance, I’ll reduce the tax on dogs. That will help you a little ” “You’ll take it all off, will you?” “Yes, every cent of it. Wilbyou vote for me ?” “No, I’ll be hanged if I do. I don’t wan’t the tax taken off’n dogs.” “That’s singular. Why?” “Haze the darned dogs killed fortyseven of my sheep, last night, and I want to make the dog-tax pay fur ’em.” “Then I’ll make a law to kill all the dogs.” “If you ever make a law I expect it will kill dogs, but I don’t think you’ll make any. I don’t want the dogs killed." “That’s strange. Why don’t you wan’t them killed?” “Wall, es it weren’t for dogs to kill sheep, mutton and wool would soon be too cheap; and es it wuzn’t fur huntin’ dogs, ’possums would be too dear. You see I'm fur protective tariff on dogs and fur free trade on taut ton and ’possums, I guess you mought ez well move on, strange ', onless onless ye’ve got some ‘coffin varnish’ in that thar bottle in yer hip pocket. I git powerful dry talkin’ politi ks. Thanks, t iat kind uv argvment will win all ove these parts. I’ll vote fur ye, stranger.”— Paris Bea' eon.