Democratic Sentinel, Volume 8, Number 33, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 12 September 1884 — She Couldn’t Find Her Berth. [ARTICLE]

She Couldn’t Find Her Berth.

A young lady who had been tucked in next door to the Chicago Bishop had been tumbling and tossing about on a sleepless pillow, and it must have been about 1 o’clock when she climbed out of bed and went down the aisle, balancing herself with the aid of the curtains till the water cooler was reached. There was no cup in the tray, not a soul was in sight, and turning on the faucet, she began to fill her hands with the ice beverage, and between the jolting of the flying train and her own nervousness I should think she must have sucked in three big drops. The operation was persisted in for several minutes, and, apparently refreshed, she then glided back to her bed. But, shades of St. Anthony! where could it be ? She had forgotten to look at the number, nor did it occur to yer to mark it in any way. She tried every pair of curtains on her side of the car, but all were buttoned together, and nowhere was there an opening visible. It did not occur to her that the bunks were low down, and as each attempt was made at a level opposite the eye saw no possible chance of an entree. She grew brave after a little, and seemed about determined to make an entrance at the foot of a bed on the right. While industriously, but most cautiously, examining the connections between the curtains, a big, bare foot was thrust out from between the buttons, and the frightened creature went flying down the aisle as though pursued by the forty wizards of the Giant’s Causeway. She did not scream, which, perhaps, alarmed the proprietor of the aforesaid foot, who soon emerged in a most grotesque outfit, which consisted of a white woolen cap, cut the shape of a catsup funnel, and wearing a red knitted slip, cut low-necked and just clearing the tops of his knees, which were gnarled and twisted and about the color of a wild grape vine. “Well, young woman, what are you doing there ?” “Nothing.” “What were you mauling around my feet fur?” “Oh, I beg your pardon, sir. I did not intend to disturb you, but I came out for a drink of water and could not find my berth when I went back. ” “What’s your number, and perhaps I can get you in?” “I don’t know, ” came the answer in a whispered voice, but the precaution was unnecessary, for by that time the old man’s voice had wakened up every one and the aisles were full of keaejs which came out in a double row the entire length of the car. Still there was neither porter nor attendant in sight, and when the old man in his funny skull cap and short red night dress turned the angle at the drawing room he yelled out: “Here, you old snoozer, come and put this girl to bed, and stay here and look after things. ” “Yes, sah—there you are lady.” “ Thank you. ” “You’re welcome, madame.” “Good-night.” “Good-night,” and the stillness was unbroken, save by the rumbling train, till 5 o’clock, when the same jolly porter shouted, “Time to get up. Change cars for Minneapolis, Fargo, Bismarck and all points West.” —Chicago Tribune.