Democratic Sentinel, Volume 8, Number 26, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 25 July 1884 — Wanted a Divorce. [ARTICLE]

Wanted a Divorce.

A middle-aged countryman walked into the office of a prominent Newport attorney and took a seat, when the following conversation took place: “I called in to see about giftin' a divorce from my wife.” “Ah! What seems to be the difficulty?" “Well, me and Jinny are always quarreling and think it would be better if she would go back to her folks and I stay where I am. She ken take the three children with her.” “On what grounds do you want a divorce?” “Well, you see, it’s just this way. Jinny’s the most skeeriest woman of tramps ye ever seen, and so when we go up-stairs to bed she wants me to look under the bed for a man, when I know ther' ant no man there. So you see that riles me and I get mad, and then she gets mad, and then there’s a fuss, and I don’t have no peace and can’t get no sleep, and I’m a hard-working man.” “You can’t get a divorce on those grounds, sir.” “I can’t?” “No, sir.” “Well, then, I know what I'll do. I’ll go home and saw the legs off the bed close up, so a man can’t get under. If I had thought of that sooner I might have saved all this time cornin’ inhere.” —Kentucky State Journal .