Democratic Sentinel, Volume 8, Number 6, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 7 March 1884 — SONGS OF THE HUMORISTS. [ARTICLE]

SONGS OF THE HUMORISTS.

A DILEMMA. To write, or not to write, that la the question. Whether it la nobler in the mind to suffer The reputation of being asked by A young lady to write In her autograph album. And having kept the book two years, more or leas, And then not written In It— Or to take the pen against a host of doubt* and fears And, by onoe writing, end them? To start—to write— To write to make a blot—ay, there’s For in that darksome blot what feelings are Shown forth—nervousness, distrust of self. And many others!—not as When one is writing to his girl, for then IX he should make a blot, he draws a line Round it and says It was Intentional, and meant to mark A place where he did kiss. And she Believes the yam, and Ua3es it, and thinks That she is happy. —Boston Globe. t DROPPED ON HIS GAME, llamma gave our Nelly an apple. So round, and big, and rea; It seemed, beside da'ntv wee Nelly, To almost eclipse her head. Beside her young Neddie was standing— And Neddie loves apples, too. Ah, Nellie," said Neddie, "Give Brother A bite of your apple—ah, do!" Dear Nelly held out.the big apple; Ned opened his month very wide— So wide that the stvtlcd red apple Could almost inside! And, oh! what a bite he gave It! The apple looked small, I declare. When Ned gave it back to his sister. Leaving that big bite there. *», Poor Nelly looked frightened a moment, Then a thought made her face grow bright; “Here, Ned, you can take the appleiI’d rather have the bite!” \ EXHORTING HYMN. / Change yer heart, ole Uncle Mose, Change yer habits, tco; For de brack skin on yer nose Can’t get red er blaef An’ de debbil’s cornin’ close. Lookin’ hard at you. Chorus—Yes, de debbil’s cornin’ close, Burnin’ hot an’ iizzin', Lookin’ at yer shiny nose; That's a way o' his’n. An’ his place, as well yer knows, Is more hotter’n disn’n. Uncle Mose, jes change yer ways— Jine de holy band. An’ while Part on Baxter prays. Hide yer thievin’ hahd; Hope lor better, better days In dat promised land. • Chorus—Glory! hear dat Hon roar! Cause urn lose a sinner; Ole Mose entered at de door; Now de Lam’ am winner. An’ will shed dat lion’s gore— Eat um up for dinner. —Texas Siftings. BABY LOUISE. I’m in love with you, Baby'Louise! With your silken hair and your soft bine eyes, And the dreamy wisdom that in them lies, And the faint, sweet smile you brought from the skies— Gou’a sunshine, Baby Louise! When you fold your hands. Baby Louise l Your hands, like a fairy’s, so tiny and fair — With a pretty, innocent, saint-like air. Are you trying to think of some angel-tanght prayer You learned above, Baby Louise? I'm in love with you, Baby Louise! Why, yon never raise your beautiful head! Some day, little one, your cheek will grow red With a hush of delight to hear the words said, “I love you,” Baby Louise. Do you bear me, Baby Louise? I have sung your praise for nearly an hoar, And your las lies keep drooping lower and lower, And you’ve gone to sleep like a weary flower, N Ungrateful Baby Louise! HOW IT WAS INVENTED. Old Mother Hubbard Went to the cupboard To get her poor dog a bone; But when she got there The cupboard was bare, And so the poor dog had none. She was in a great stew To know what to do, For of money she had not a cent; So she sold her last suit To buy meat for the brute, And up-town in her nightgown she went. Theladies who 3aw It And the string to draw it Declared it the nicest thing ont; Sd now on the street, Looking ever so neat, In their gowns they go rushing about. —Washington llepubtican. A Y’S FARMER. The Whitehall Times givos a somewhat dr* cuinstantlal account of an enterprising agriculturist, with much economy of type: There is a farmer who Is Y’s Enough to take his E’s, And study nature with his I’s And think of what he C’s. He hears the chatter of the J’s As they each other T’s. And Z’s that when a tree D K’s It makes a home for B’b. , A pair of oxen he will U’s, With many haws and O’s, And their mistakes he will X Q’s, While plowing for his P’s, In raising crops he all X L’s, And therefore little O’s, And when he hoes his soli by spells He also soils his hose.