Democratic Sentinel, Volume 8, Number 3, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 15 February 1884 — Page 6

KKN UNCIA TION. Both bird and cage were fair, And ooth belonged to me; Yet ever with heartfnt eyes The bird looked over the sea. Within their Under depths Shone ever a wild unrest; Ever against the bare It beat its beautiful breast. »I raid, I will make its cage Bo bright, and glad, and gay. With all that love can do. • It cannot choose but stay. In vain! With all my art. Still it was plain to me That ever with longing eyes My bird looked over the sea. Then I said, I will bold it close— Surely it is my right— I will keep this prec ous thing. If not by love, by might. In vain! Though mine the power To hold or set*it tree. Nf t mine to hold its heart— That could escape from me. Then I said. Be free, O bird, To spread your beautiful wings. Who cares for a song, unless It's also the heart that sings? For the glance of eyes that shine. If shining they also rove? For the snowiest breast, if ne’er It beat with the pulse of love? Wide I opened the door; But I turned mv face away. For men are weak sometimes, Whatever the world may say. A thrill of joy rang out From a happy, songful breast— A flash of wirigs—alas! My heart told all the rest M y bird will never come back; Yet why should I weep or sigh. If only the thing I love Has entered its native sky? "Twill never come back. I know; But who, his love to prove. Is willing to be forget. Stands on the heights of Love.

ICHABOD TURNER’S MISSION.

“Crooked! crooked! crooked!” rang out the sharp, peculiar, dissonant voice, and the tall thin figure in seedy garments and flapping hat swayed to and fro on the stump that had been selected for a rostrum. “All things have gone crooked in this world, and I’ve come, to set ’em straight—to undo the snarls, give the power where it belongs, and put men. in their places. Oh—h—h, my friends! The world is topsy-turvy; the top’s at the bottom and the. bottom’s at the top, and I’ve come to turn things right end up. ” The 6 o’clock whistle had sounded the close of another day’s work at the shops, and the men, pouring out from the various smoke-stained archways, paused to listen. It was a motley group —some bedaubed with many colors from the paint-rooms, some with grimy hands and faces from foundry or machine shop, while further back on the long platform that extended along the track were gathered that inevitable adjunct of any crowd, the boys, and a sprinkling of women—some of the latter with children in their arms. The speaker’s excitement seemed to deepen as his audience increased. The keen eyes under the old hat darted lightninglike glanqeshere and there; he gesticulated wildly and his voice rose to a still higher pitch. “Oh—h—h, yes! Look at me! I’m Ichabod Turner, and the mission I’m sent on is to mend all crookedness and turn things right end up!” The men seeined to find a grim pleasure in the harangue. They laughed as they exchanged comments. “Chosen a good point to begin at, eh, Jack?” questioned one. “I should say so! He’ll have a tough contract, even if he doesn’t extend his territory.”

“Goin* to'pet all tilings straight? It’ll take a mightier man than you to do that job. I wish to massy he’d begin it soon!” murmured an old woman on the platform, as she picked up her bundle and trudged on again. The two men looked after her, and the elder shook, his grizzled head. “Poor soul! No doubt things seem crooked enough to her—her boy was crushed between the cars last year. Does seem as if somebody might indent a way to get along with killing fewer brakemen." Jim Barclay, sauntering down the long walk, stopped beside a bright young girl who had paused for a moment on the outer edge of the crowd. “If that fellow would begin his work by altering the days and nights a little, or by means of enjoying them, I’d be obliged to him,” he laughed. < The girl turned with a little start of surprise and pleasure. “Why, Jim,” then a glance at his lunch-basket brought the swift question, “you’re pot going out to-night? “It’s not your run. ” “I must make it, though, they say. It’s an extra train, and they are short of men, somehow—off or disabled. I feel considerable disabled myself.” “You were out last night?” “And the night before, and nearly all yesterday. I didn’t get in to-day until afternoon, and I was scarcely settled into a comfortable sleep before I was called. I’m not fit to go, that’s a fact. Don’t worry, Dell.” , - He broke off his sentences abruptly, as he saw the shadow of anxiety on his companion’s fair face. “It doesn’t happen so often. They’re short, you see.” ; “It oughtn’t to happen at all,” insist,cd Dell, indignantly. “I wouldn’t go.” i “Then my head would come off’ at short notice,” laughed Jim. “We can’t afford that.” Pretty Dell flushed rosily. She knew so well what that meant. There was a little house talked over and arranged to every detail of its simple furnishing, for which the two were planning when Jim should obtain his hopedfor promotion. “No, I won’t insure any necks tonight, but I’ll take the risk of crushing a few other people’s heads rather than the certainty of losing my own,” laughed Jim. “It's a pity that fellow, who is so sure of Ins mission, couldn’t turn my brains right side up; they feel crooked enough. But don't worry, Dell, ’’ he repeated, hurriedly. The crowd began to thin. Hungry mfcn, swinging their empty dinner pails, presently found the prospect of supper more alluring than the stranger’s promised millennium. Jim looked at his watch and found he Had not even five minutes to spare for a part of the homeward walk with Dell. He parted from her with a reluctant good-by, and she walked away alone. She had gone but a few steps, however, when she turned and looked back. “You’ll be careful, Jim? Don’t let anything happen. ”

I “Why, Dent’ He laughed, half touched, half wondering. “I oughtn’t to have talked such nonsense. Don’t be uneasy." She smiled in answer, and the cloud slowly faded from her face as she walked on. A call for extra service was no cause for serious trouble—all these exigencies were so familiar to her. Bell and whistle, messenger and dispatch, with their always imperative and often unwelcome orders, were part of her daily life. Jim would be tired and worn out, of course. That had happened often, and would doubtless happen again, but her thoughts turned to pleasanter pictures of the future, to arranging once more that tiny house with its dainty rooms, which should be a very haven of rest to one who came home weary. She paused on the long iron bridge and looked down on the • network of tracks below, crossing and interlacing in a seemingly inextricable tangle. The gray twilight of the short autumn afternoon was already deepening toward night, and the headlights of the enginps passing and repassing as they changed from one track to another, shone out brilliantly. Men were running here and there, waving their signal lanterns and shouting hoarse orders that to one uninitiated only mingled confusedly with the heavy breathing of the locomotives and the clangor of bells. Farther back, looming in rugged outlines against the faint rose of the western sky, were the great shops, grim and silent. The brown eyes watching from the bridge presently discovered the figure they sought winding its way in and out among the trains. He did not look up, and the girl smiled at the thought of watching him, herself unobserved. Then her face grew grave and sweet, with a passing fancy that so, from their height above the din and turmoil, the unseen angels looked down upon our mortal life. “Only, I suppose, all the tangles and bewilderments grow clear to them, as I am sure they do not to me, ” she added, with a little sigh. “And their watching is of some use, while mine cannot help poor Jim.”

He had some need of help as the evening wore on, though he but dimly realized it. Getting everything in readiness for starting was harder work than usual. There was a dull pain in his eyes and a throbbing in his temples. “This trip’s rather rough on you, Jim?” remarked a fireman, half q"uestioningly, half commiseratingly. “Rather!” Jim laughed faintly. “I’m stiff and used up, but 11l get*over it when we’re fairly off, I expect.” When the station, with its dim and dancing lights, was left behind, however, and the long line stretched away straight before him, his occupation became but a mere routine, so treacherously familiar that it would scarcely hold his eyes or thoughts. Mechanically he attended to his engine, with his mind straying far away from it to Dell, and then running oddly into a confused memory of the speaker at the depot, until the swift movement of the polished rods before him seemed the motion of gesticulating arms and the sound in his ears resolved itself into a measured repetition of meaningless words, “Crooked and straight; right side up!” “Hello! Caught myself napping, I do believe! Jim Barclay, what are you about? See here, Bill”—to his fireman —“just keep an eye on me, will you?” The young engineer shook himself, looked about him and stood stiffly erect. He whistled a tune vigorously to assure himself that he was wide awake. What a drowsy, rocking motion the train had! Even the jar and rattle seemed to lull and stupefy, though he stood erect at his post. He was glad shis sort of work was nearly over, for he did not see how the desired promotion could be much longer delayed, and then such calls as this would be fewer. He was looking anxiously forward to the day when he could carry the longed-for tidings to Dell. Dear little girl, how her face would brighten! What a cozy, happy home she would make! and she said the curtains wouldn’t cost anything, and the hammock on the porch to rest in. Lights ? Queer where the lights came from, unless—why, yes, almost to a station, of course. Dell must have put a bright light in the window. Alas,! Bill had climbed back over the tender to look after a suspected hot-box on the after truck. Shriek after shriek of warning from a steam whistle aided the flashing signal lights, and at last forced their meaning upon the benumbed brain. With a low cry of horror the engine was reversed, but too late to avoid the crash that followed as the two freight trains were piled upon each other in common wreck.

“What possessed you to run in that fashion, man? Were you drunk or crazy ?” demanded more than one rough voice, as Jim .stood by the track. But he only gazed, with blanched face at the scene before him, and answered them nothing. “Fortunately—almost miraculously, it- seemed—no one was seriously injured,” as the morning papers said, in chronicling the occurrence. Under the same glaring headlines they also commended the promptness of the company in dismissing “the engineer whose criminal carelessness caused the disaster, and who, as nearly as can be learned, was comfortably sleeping at his post, and so neglectful of all signals!” These were the tidings that reached Dell, instead of the glad word for which she bad waited. “What they say is true, after a fashion,” said Jim, simply and sadly.. “I was to blame for it—and yet I wasn’t, for I was not fit to make the rum. and I told them so. ” | fThere was no one to chronicle his years of faithful service, or the “criminal carelessness,” if not cruelty, which had placed him in* such a position; but these things were well understood ampng the many workers in that railroad fcwn, and they acknowledged, to each other, with ready but helpless sympathy, that it was “rough oft poor Jim. ‘ <•;, . ; Rough- it surely grew as-the long,days, cane and went, and the hope of reinstatement grew dimmer. “AU those missing men, who couldn’t be found when I needed a single night’s rest,

seem to have turned up once more, and they can spare me indefinitely,” he explained to Dell, with a pretense of jocularity that scarcely covered the ‘ bitterness. The brave little .woman tried to comfort and encourage him, I though the dancing light had gone out i of her brown eyes, and new grave lines ! were deepening about the young lips. . The little house they had planned < seemed so like the shadowy ghost of a . dead hope that neither cared to talk of : it any more, and, indeed, Dell’s ingenu- • ity found full occupation now in com- | bating the various wild schemes which j Jim, in his desperation, was constantlv forming. He had been away to look for employment, but business was dull everywhere at this season; and, moreover, grown up in that railroad town, where all interest and industry centered in the shops and tracks, he had belonged to the line from boyhood; he could do but one thing, and there was little chance for a situation elsewhere while the shadow of the great corporation’s disapproval seemed to follow liim in all his efforts like a blighting frost. So the bright autumn leaves dropped from the trees, leaving only brown and barren branches; the soft haze faded from the hills, and the narrow iron track, stretching away over the frozen earth toward the cold gray sky, looked to Dell’s sorrowful eyes a fitting emblem of the dreary life road that lay before her.

“I’m going away to-morrow,” Jim was saying, as they passed slowly over the bridge and down toward the town. “I’ve shown idiocy enough in waiting here for-any chance of justice. I mean to go as far West as I can make my way, and I’ll come back when I’ve some good word to bring—-if that time ever comes." It was useless to combat his purpose; there was nothing better to offer. The girl’s wistful gaze strayed with a dreary persistency to the track again. What a hard, narrow road it was, stretching on to its cheerless goal—the far-away wintry horjzon! Down on the walk by the round-house a knot of 'loungers had gathered. Ichabod Turner’s wanderings had brought him thither again—the place seemed toehold some peculiar fascination for him —and he was discoursing on his favorite theme. Suddenly a movement and murmur of excitement ran through the crowd, and its numbers, were speedily augmented from various quarters of the building. Swiftly and unexpectedly the speaker had turned, and with a single bound placed himself in the cab of a locomotive that had for a moment been left untenanted. “It’s .steamed up! Off ! off ! Come out of that!” shouted several voices. But Ichabod laughed hoarsely and waved his long arms triumphantly above his head. “I’m the only man on this continent that can run an engine! I’m ordered to take this one and go and turn the world right side up! Hurrah!” Two or three persons rushed forward, but fie caught up an iron bar and wielded it so vigorously that they were obliged to «fall back. Then, like a flash, his hand seized the throttle-lever, and the dangerous steed he had chosen began to show signs of life. “Pull him off!” “Lock the wheels!” rang out in conflicting orders. But the madman laughed again, his wild eyes gleaming like fire, and shook his bar in threatening and defiance. “Touch me if you dare! I’m sent to set the crooked straight. Here comes the millennium! Clear the track for the millennium!” And he was off. Swiftly as an arrow some one darted through the crowd, ran along the track, and leaped on the engine, clinging, no one knew how, as it moved away. Dell found herself suddenly deserted, and could only move forward with the others, who were following with eyes of mingled admiration and horror the athletic figure clinging and swinging as the speed increased until it finally forced its way into the cab. “What a terror to be left loose on the road! Who can tell what he will run into before he can be stopped!” exclaimed one with a white face. “Jim Barclay’ll manage him!” “Jim’ll be killed!” answered dissenting voices. Jim’s unexpected appearance in the cab, meanwhile, had momentarily confused its occupant, who until then had not been aware of his presence. “Where did you come from?” he demanded in suprise. “Flew down,” panted Jim; “sent to help you. But what on earth do you mean by trying to start the millennium in broad daylight?” “Daylight?” repeated Ichabod, bewildered by an earnestness and assurance as fierce as his own. “Don’t you know we ipust wait until the stars begin to fall? Besides, we must go back and telegraph to all the world to clear the track for i».” He was Inproving his companion’* momentary confusion by gently edging into his place and crowding him back, while he urged the superior advantages of his own plan of proceeding. All the details of that brief, horrible ride Jins could never clearly recall; but with the engine once in bis own hands he held possession, and as soon as it was possible reversed it, endeavoring the while to distract the other’s attention by a stream of explanations concerning their joint mission. The suggestion of clearing the track seemed to suit Ichabod’s crazed brain, and seizing the cqrd near him he clung to it so persistently that the shrieking, deafening steam-whistle drowned out all further efforts at conversation, and never ceased its terrific din until they rolled back into the great yard. Officers, police, and train dispatchers had been hastily notified, only to find themselves helpless in the matter, and a line of anxious spectators watched the engine’s return. Then,' discovering for the first time that his project was foiled, or bent upon some new scheme —no one could tell which—lchabod suddenly dropped the cord, and, before his companion could surmise his intention, leaped to the track. A moment later he was drawn from under the cruel wheels and tenderly lifted. “$o endeth —the fitst lesson,” he murmured, and then all earthly tangles for him were over, and life’s rough places grew smooth and plain. Jim was greeted with congratula-

I tions praises, and questions on every i I side. “That was a brave deed of yours, sir j |— a dangerous undertaking, very skill- , i fully planned and executed,” declared an officer of the road, with a eongratu- i latory shake of the, hand: "It fat more than cancels that little misfortune of yours last fall. There is no telling where this thing might have ended but for you. Call around at the office in the morning, will you? We shall have something to say to you. ” “What dees that mean?” questioned .eager Dell, as Jim made his way to her (ride. “It means that everything is all right again,” answered Jim, with an odd smile playing about his lips. “Queer how soon a bit of success can change a great crime into merely ‘a little misfortune.’” The excitement was over, and the yard slowly settled back to its ordinary routine, but the young engineer and pretty Dell lingered for a last pitying, tender glance at the still form, reveriently covered now. “For, whatever he may have been to the rest of the world, dear Jim, for us he fulfilled his mission,” said the girl, softly.— Kate W. Hamilton, in Our Continent. .

A Valuable List to Save.

As some discussion has arisen as to the settlement of this country, the following statement will be of interest: Virginia was settled at Jamestown in 1607, by English; New York in 1614, at New York, by Dutch; Massachusetts at Plymouth, in 1620, by English; New Hampshire in 1623, at Little Harbor, by English; Connecticut in 1633, at Windsor, by English; Maryland in 1634, at St. Mary, by English; Rhode Island in 1636, at Providence, by English; Delaware in 1638, at Wilmington, by Swedes; North Carolina in 1650, at Chowan River, by English; New Jersey in 1664, at Elizabeth, by English; South Carolina in 1670, at Ashley River, by English; Pennsylvania in 1682, at Philadelphia, by English; Georgia in 1733, at Savannah, by English ; Vermont in 1724, at Fort Dumner, by English; Kentucky in 1775, at Brownsbdrough, by English: Tennessee in 1750, at Fort Loudon, by English; Ohio in 1788, at Marietta, by English; Louisiana in 1699, at Iberville, by French; Jndiana in 1730, at Vincennes, by French; Mississippi in 1716, at Natchez, by French; Illinois in 1720, at Kaskaskia, by French; Alabama in 1711, at Mobile, by French; Maine in 1623, at Saco, by English; Missouri in 1764, at St. Louis, by French; Arkansas in 1685, at Arkansas Post, by French; Michigan in 1670, at Detroit, by French; Florida in 1565, at St. Augustine, by Spaniards; Texas in 1792, at S. A. De Bezan, by Spaniards; lowa in 1733, at Burlington, by English; Wisconsin in 1699, at Green Bay, by French; California in 1769, at San Diego, by Spaniards; Minnesota in 1846, at St. Paul, by Americans; Oregon in 1811, at Astoria, by Americans; Kansas by Americans; West Virginia by Americans; Nevada at Carson City, by Americans; Nebraska and Colorado by Americans.— Boston Transcript.

A War Relic.

The following circular is one of thousands that were spread broadcast over the land immediately after the assassination of President Lincoln: 530,000 Reward! Description of John Wilkes Booth, • Who assassinated the President the evening of April 14, 1805: Hight, five feet eight inches; weight, 160 pounds; compact build; hair, jet black, inclined to curl, medium length, parted behind; eyes black, and dark, heavy eyebrows; wears a large seal ring on little linger; when talking, inclines his head forward; looks down. Description of the person who attempted to assassinate the Hon. W. H. Seward, Secretary of State: Hight, six feet one inch; hair, black, thiek, full, and straight; no beard er appearance of beard; cheeks red on jaws; face moderately full; 22 or 23 years Of age; eyes, color not known—large eyes! not prominent; brows not heavy, but dark; face not large, but rather round; complexion healthy; nose straight and well formed, medium size; mouth small, lips thin, upper lip protruded when he talked; chin pointed and prominent; head medium size; neck short, of medium length; hands soft and small; Angers tapering; broad shoulders; taper waist; straight figure; strong-looking man; manner not gentlemanly, but vulgar; overcoat doublebreasted, color mixed, of pink and gray spots, small—wore a sack overcoat, pockets insides, and one on breast, with lapels oar flaps; pants, black, common stufl; new heavy bo?ts; voice small and thin, inclined t® tenor. The Common Council of Washington, D. C., have offered a reward of $20,000 for the airrest and conviction of these assassins, in addition to which I will pay SIO,OOOL.C. Baker, Colonel and Agent of the War Department. Baker was the efficient and powerful Chief of the Government Seeret Service during the war. The assassin described as having attempted to take the life of Secretary Seward was Harold. A brother of Baker commanded the detachment of cavalry which discovered Booth in the barn, and guarded his body after he had been shot by Sergt. Boston Corbett.

The Magnetic Pole.

In a lecture at Glasgow by Prof. Thompson, he states that the magnetic pole is at present near Boothia Felix, more than 100 miles to the west of the geographical pole. Singular enough, in 1657, the position of the needle showed the magnetic pole to be due north. It had been eastward before that; it then began to point westward, and this westward variation continued to increase until 1816, when the maximum was attained; it has since steadily diminished, and in 1976 it will again point to the true north. Prof. Thompson says that the changes which have been observed not only in the direction but in the strength of the earth’s magnetism .show that the same causes which originally magnetized the earth are still at work; and strangely enough, these changes to not occur at long intervals in the course of centuries but are going on from day to day, from week to week, and from year to year. A Yankee editor remarks that he has lately seen a couple of sisters who had to be told, everything together, for they were so much alike that they could not be told apart. Brought down the house—The build' ing mover. •

THE BAD BOY.

“Come in the back room, Hennery, I | want to talk with you,” said the grocery ! man to the bad boy, as he came in laughing and slapping his hands on his legs. “I have heard something to-day j that has hurt me as much as though you* was mv own boy,” and the grocery man looked as though it wouldn’t take many good-sized onions to make the tears come. “Great jewhillikens,what is it ?” asked the bad boy, as his face sobered down at the look of pain on the face of his mercantile friend. “What is the matter? Won’t your creditors accept 10 cents on the dollar ?” and the boy looked like a lawyer, ready to help a client out, and reached into a cinnamon bag and took out a handful of cinnamon. “No, nothing of that kind,” said the grocery man. “I have concluded not to fail. But I am told on good authority that you have become bad again, and that you have been playing the meanest trick on your pa that you have ever played. The minister told me he was coming in from a country funeral the other day, and he overtook your pa on the road with a gun, and asked him to get in and ride, and your pa’s pants were all torn, his boots and gun full of snow, and he was so scared that he kept

looking around all the way to town, expecting to be shot in the back. Now, what kind of a way is that to treat the author of your being ? Say, you will have a through ticket to the bad place, and your train will leave on schedule time, and arrive at tke Grand Central depot in hades, just as the tire is kindled. You bad, bad boy. I have been proud of you, and thought you would come out all right, but now I know you are a hypocrite.” “There, there, don’t put ou any extra sadness, ” said the boy, as he quartered an orange. “Pa is all right. He wanted us to stir him up. You see, since I have been good, pa has been neglected, and he has become sour, and his clothes don’t fit. He told ma that what he wanted was excitement, and he had got to have it. He said when the boys were playing things on him, and making him scratch gravel, and he felt as though a house was going to fall on him every minute, he enjoyed himself, had a good appetite, and felt equal to any emergency, but since the boys had become good, and let him alone, his life was a burden, he had failed in business, and everything went wrong, and unless there was a change soon, he would lose his mind. He said he sighed for the old times, when he didn’t know whether he was afoot or a horseback, and when something was liable to happen every, minute. He said he was brought up to be surprised, and fall through holes, and to have everything stop, and to lead a quiet life, add just, eat, drink, and sleep, with no cyclones, no happy laughter of children raising the deuce, was more than he could bear. Ma told me about it, and the state of mind pa was in, and I felt sorry for pa. Ma told me to try and think up something that would sort of wake up pa, or he would relapse into a state of melancholic, and have to hire a doctor. I told my chum about pa’s case, and he said it was too bad to see a man suffer that way, and we must do something to save his life. So we agreed to take pa out rabbit hunting. I asked pa if he didn’t want to go with us, and he jumped right up and yelled, and said it would tickle him half to death to go. I told him where there was a place about four miles out of town, but the man that owned the farm drove everybody off. Pa said for us to come on. Well, you’d a dide. Pa wasn’t afraid of anybody, until the man hollered to him to git. You see, we went out to the farm, and stationed pa by the fence; and my chum and me went on the other side of a piece of woods, to scare rabbits toward pa. Then we went up to the farm house, where a man lived that we know, and told him we wanted to scare a man out of his boots, and he said all right, go ahead. So we borrowed some farmer’s clothes, and bld plug hats, and went around behind the barn and yelled to pa to get off that farm. Pa said for us to go to, the bad place. He said he came out to hunt rabbits, and by gosh he was going to hunt rabbits. ’ Then my chum and me started toward pa, wading through the snow, and pa thought we were grown men, seven feet high. When we got about twenty rods from pa we told him to ‘ git,’ and he was going to argue with us, when we pulled up our guns • and fired both barrels at him. We had blank cartridges, but pa thought he felt shot str-iking him everywhere, and he started for a barbed wire fence, and we loaded our guns again and fired just as pa got on the fence, and he yelled murder. You know these barbed wire .fences, don’t you ? The barbs catch on your pants, and hang on. Well, pa got caught by the pants, and couldn’t get over, and we kept firing, and he dropped his gnn in the snow, and tried to tear the fence down, and he kept yelling, ‘ For God’s sake, gentlemen, spare my life. I don't want any of your rabbits.’ I got to laughing so I couldn’t shoot, and I laid down in a snow bank, and my chum kept shooting. Pa finally got oft* the fence and burrowed in a snow-bank, and held up a piece of his shirt which the fence tore off, for a flag of truce, and we quit, and he stuck up his head and saw me laying there on the snow, and pa thought his gnn had gone off and killed one of the farmers, and my chum said, “Great hevings, you have killed him 1 ’ At that pa grabbed his gun and run for the road, and started for town, and that’s where the minister overtook him. Along toward night me and my chum came home with four rabbits, and we told pa he was a pretty rabbit hunter to leave before the rabbits got to running, and that we looked all around for him. He looked surprised, and asked us if we struck any corpses around on that farm, and I thought I should bust. We told him we didn’t see any, and then he told us that he was standing there waiting for rabbits, when a gang of about fifteen roughs came and ordered him away, and he refused to go. He said they opened fire on him, and he threw himself into a hallow square, the way they used to do in the army, threw up intrenohments of snow, and defended himself, audwhen he was finally

surrounded and had to retreat, he saw the ground covered with dead and wounded, and he expected he had wiped out an entire neighborhood. He said it was singular we didn't see any corpses. I asked him how he tore his pants, and he said the gang shot them all to piece®. Then we told him of the joke we hail played on him, and how we fired blank cartndges at him as he was trying to get over the fence, and he tried to laugh, but he couldn't. He was inclined to be mad at first, but finally he said this was more like business, and he hadn’t felt as well before since we initiated him into the Masons, and we could play anything on him, and do anything we chose except let him alone. So you see I am not so bad as you think. Pa enjoys it, and so does my chum and me. Eh! old rutabaga, do you see ?” “O, yes, that is all right if your pa likes that kind of fun, but if you was my boy I would maul you till you couldn’t stand.” Just then a big cannon fire-cracker that the boy had lit and laid on the floor exploded and the grocery man went out of the back door bareheaded while the boy went out the front door whistling; “Be sure and cal me early, for I’m to be queen of the May.”— Peck's Sun.

Edited Poetry.

Probably no class of men are thrown into more intimate relations with poets than editors of newspapers. A handmade, patent poet came into this office recently, and he had his manuscript with h,m. He cleared his bronchial tubes, threw on a few tremolo, flute, vox harmonica, and other stops, and commenced: “Under the Willows a maiden fair Was braiding her wealth or golden hair.” “That won’t jibe with the tone of this paper,” we said, sharply. “It won’t?” inquired the poet, in a tone of surprised suddenness. “Why, no. Don’t you recognize that this journal isn’t a second-hand musicbox ? The rhythm is all right enough, but you don’t seem to catch on to the true ring. Don’t you think this would be better? “Down in the kitchen a maiden fair Out of the hash was picking a ha r.” “Well, possibly, the way you put it,” said the poet, shifting uneasily in his chair. “Why, of course it would; give us the next stanza. ” “She thought of the flower, the stars above. And then she thought of the power of love." “Oh, she did, eh? Well, we shall have to get you to fix that up this way: “While thinking of Mike, who was oft beside’ her. She turned around and stepped in the spider.” The poor poet wiped away a tear. He saw at once that, with our strong, practical common-sense views of life, ’we had him cn the hip; and he couldn’t help himself either, “ Warble the next stauza, ” we said curtly. Breathing hard like a pacing horse just in from a mile heat the poor wretched poet proceeded: “The wind came up from the sunny south. And kissed the maiden on cheek and mouth.’ “That, verse will do well enough if you’ll only make one little change in it.” “What is it ?” inquired the perspiring poet, brightening up a trifle and exhibiting a trifle more animation. “Say you make it read this way: “She grabbed it up with a surly grow-el And wiped it out with a Tut kish towel.” “That is quite a little change,” said the depressed poet. “Do you think it would improve it ?”* “Certainly. Swing in with the next earmen. ” “The maiden rose from her rusiic seat, And silently passed through the lonely street “That’s the close,” he said timidly, and with a long sigh of relief. “Oh, that's the close, is it? All right. Well, yon will find we are right along with you. Just alter that this way: “Down on the girl the housewife bore. And tired her thiuHigh the kitchen door.” “Now, you see„ with the aid of the few minor suggestions which we have made, you can trim that thing of yoursinto some respectable kind of shape. Besides that yon have got a poem which you can split— a kind of double-bar-reled poem—and sell half to one paper and the other half to another,” The poet exhibited no little alacrity in< preparing to take his departure.— Texas Siftin gs.

A Powerful Voice.

A French actor claims to have the most powerful voice in France. One of his fellow actors, Machanette, disputed the honor with him one day, and after much wrangling they agreed to settle their claim by actual test at the Port. St. Martin case. “I’ll lay a wager that. I can break a pane of glass by simply calling ‘Come in!’ ” said Machanette. “I’ll wager that you’ll not. be able to. do it, and that I will,” said Dumaine. “Done!” Dumaine commenced. The window rattled, but did not break, but there was a panic among the waiters. Then Machanette tried, and lo! two panes of glass were shattered. Dumaine owned that he had lost.; but it was not long before they both found out that two of their friends, overhearing the wager, had placed themselves outside the case and smashed the windows with their canes at the moment of Machanette’b bellowing.— Breakfast Table.

How to Make Good Ink.

The following recipe is claimed to be 230 years old, and is said to make an ink of peculiarly lasting qualities: Bain water, one pint; galls, bruised, one and one-half ounces; green copperas, six drachms; gum Arabic, ten drachms. The galls must be coarsely powdered and put in a bottle, and the other ingredients and water added. The bottle securely stoppered is placed in the light (sun if possible), and its contents are stirred occasionally until the gum and copperas is dissolved; after which it is enough to shake the bottle daily, and in the course of a month or six weeks it will be fit for use. Add ten drops of carbolic acid to the contents of the bottle, as it effectually prevents the formation and growth of mold, without any detriment to the quality oi the ink. The tobacco crop of the State of Indiana for 188-*1 aggregated in valu® $770,611.