Democratic Sentinel, Volume 7, Number 51, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 18 January 1884 — Vanished Landmarks. [ARTICLE]

Vanished Landmarks.

A rather subdued stranger entered an Austin restaurant, and, taking a seat near the door, was soon confronted by a waiter, to whom he communicated his order. The meal was soon before him, smoking hot, and, as the waiter was about to withdraw, the stranger said: “Er—see here; there are no flies in this coffee.” “Flies! O, no, sir,” replied the man with a Masonic apron, and a napkin over his shoulder. “I had expected to meet them here — in fact, I had half-way promised to — why, Heavens! I fail to recognize my old barleysoup friend, the cockroach!” “There are no cockroaches in this house, sir,” said the waiter, sternly. “And so the roach, too, has deserted us. Well, well Say, where’s the limp, wet napkin, with prune sauce on one side, and sweet oil on the other ?” “Our napkins are all fresh and newly laundried.” “Strange, ’tis passing strange. Where’s the variegated tablecloth that looked like a Dolly Varden dress pattern done up in coffee dregs and molasses?” “Our table spreads are clean every day, sir.” “Well, well.” Suddenly the man commenced spearing around in the butter dish with his fork. “I don’t find it,” he murmured, sadly. “Don’t fiiid what?” snapped the waiter. “Has she gone ?” “Has who gone?” “The bright-eyed divinity who used to conceal samples of her auburn ringlets every morning under the butter lump.* She knew I always looked forward with pleasure to those little mementos.” “Our butter ha 3 no hair.” “I see,” sighed the man. “Bald as a door knob. Hasn’t there been some kind of a change in the management of this place ?” “Yes.” “All of the dear, old, familiar landmarks seem to have disappeared. Is this a menagerie ?” “No, that’s biscuit.” “Sure enough “Ah, distinctly I remember—it was only last December — That I coolly, calmly fondled snch a biscuit o’er, and o’er; Then I broke the cover off it, and I maybe called false prophet. If a baked and blistered mouse did not roll out upon the floor.” We have previously stated that the subdued stranger was seated near the door, and it was a good thing for him that he was. The -waiter made ope wild break, but the subdued anticipator of a hearty meal fled. —Texas Siftings.