Democratic Sentinel, Volume 7, Number 50, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 11 January 1884 — PLAYING MAY AGAINST DECEMBER. [ARTICLE]

PLAYING MAY AGAINST DECEMBER.

A Dry Goods Merchant's Successful Scheme for Laying In a Full Stock of Cheap Clerks. But there is another scheme for getting cheap clerks that the dry goods merchant essays, generally with great success. It is this: A young man enters the store, and asks for something to do. The employer wrinkles his forehead, works his eyebrows down on his nose to give him the appearance of being capable of profound thought, and says: “So you want work ?” “Yes.”' “Well, we are full at present. How much do you expect ?” “Ten dollars a week.” “Tendollars a week!—slo a week!” replies the merchant, snatching the young man’s sentence and hurling it back at him like a brick. “Yes. sir,” says the young man; “$lO a week.” Then the merchant lies back in the chair and regards the young man with a patronizing air. “We never give such a salary to young, fresh, and inexperienced me >. We can get men of 50, with years of experience, for the sum you ask. We have no use for boys, because they are wild and more bother than they are worth. What we want are men of years and experience. We will give you $2 per week.” The young man accepts and goes to work. Then a man of about 50 walks in and solicits employment. The merchant lies back in his chair so far that, if he happens to be corpulent, he reminds one of the terrapin stretched out in front of a restaurant, with a placard on his under shell informing the pedestrian When he is to be served up. Then the merchant says, as he did to the young man: “So you want work?” “Yes.” “Well, we are full at present. How much do you want?” “Ten dollars a week. ” “Ten dollars a week!” says the merchant, in a tone that shows he is in a condition bordering on asphyxia. “Yes, sir,” responds the old man; “$lO per week.” Then the merchant lies back in his chair so far that he barely escapes going all the way over and sliding along the floor on his spine. “We never give such a large salary to old men, because they are slow and decrepit, and in their own way. We don’t care for old men, because they have old ideas and are way behind the times. For the sum you ask we can get bright young men with the ligljt of the morning of life in their faces. They have new ideas, and are full of vim, and can work five times harder and longer than the fossils who base their claims on an experience that might have been valuable in 1840. What we want are live young men. We will give you $2 per week. ” The old man accepts. And this is the way the merchant plays December off against May, and May off against December. — Puck.