Democratic Sentinel, Volume 7, Number 48, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 28 December 1883 — Page 7

THE “GREAT UNRUFFLED.”

The Unhappy Ix>t of the Average Motel Clerk. “If this is not a hard hotel I give it up, ” said a stranger with an easy, worldly air as he leaned upon the marble counter of a leading hotel. “What’s that, sir?” asked the obliging clerk, with an air of interest. ”Isust remarked,” said the stranger, indifferently, as he bit off and lighted his cigar, “that you kept a tough caravansary.” “Ah,” said the clerk, in the most serene and affable manner, “what can we do to increase the sum of your happiness ?” “Nothing at all at present,” was the response. “Then why do you complain?” said the clerk, with the air of a man whom nothing could annoy. . • “I registered herera while ago,” said the newcomer, “and was shown to a room by the porter. I had my own key, and still, when I entered I found a man there dressing.” “Well, what has that got to do with the hotel?” asked the qlerk. “Oh, nothing in particular, except that it proves what I said about it. It’s a hard place that don’t give one man time to get out before another is sent to take his place;” “Well;, now, me boy,” said the clerk confidingly to his*new acquaintance, “it takes a great head to run a big hotel and prevent friction. You may think you can stop it, but you can’t. It’s no use trying, and the only way to do is to let thmgs take their own course, while you do the best you can. Do you see that?” said he, touching the guest on the shoulder as if to pin the fact there with the point of his finger. “I like to hear a man talk, but I guess I’ll pay my bill if I owe you anything, and take a walk,” said the guest in an off-hand, don’t-care sort of way. “What! Leave this house ? My dear John—your naire is John, isn’t it? I think your brother told me so—you must be mad. You can’t find any Such accommodations anywhere in thfe United States. Is that a good cigar? No? Well, have another; and just wait a minute. IM have the porter show you up to 108—the best room in the house, northern exposure, opens right out 'on the alley, and is as bright and airy as a hayloft.” “I’ll take a look at it,” was the noncommittal response, and the clerk turned to give attention |o a man who wanted to know whether Mr. Jones and wife had registered there “a week ago Saturday night last,” while a bell-boy stood with a card in his hand repeating the words “Not in,” and another person begged to know whether anything had been heard from the occupant of No. 458. But the clerk was equal to the situation. Shaking his head to the man who asked for the Joneses, he said: “Notin,” to the Other, and dismissed the boy with a wave of the hand, the latter movement being prolonged into a friendly “shake” with a newcomer. “It’s rather dull to-day,” he was about to say to the last arrival, when down came a great, huffy individual, in a fever of excitement, bearing a heavy valise which he refused to permit any of the porters to touch, as if it were liable to suffer from contact with the “luggageman’s” fist. “Do I owe this house anything?” Iqe asked, as the key rattled on the marble. “Not yet, sir,” said the obliging clerk. “Well, I never will,” was the nervous> retort. “Why, sir?” “Because I am going to leave you, and I don’t propose to return. That’s why, and that’s all I’ve got to say, ” said the man with the valise. “Well, goo<J-by, sir,” said the clerk, extending his hand. But the fat man seized the traveling-bag, which had rested temporarily on the floor, and hurried toward the door. “Judge, Judge—why, wait a minute,” the clerk appealed. But the person so addressed pulled his slouch hat close over his eyes, hugged his valise tightly under his arm, and hurried away as if he were afraid he would be persuaded to stay if he should confess the cause of his singular conduct. “I guess he’s’ mad, ” was the comment of the affable man behind the counter when he qaw the porter gaping after him. “Did you do anything?” *“No, sir;” said the porter.’ “Then what ailed him ?” asked the clerk, as he shook the hand of the newest and latest arrival. “T(he bed was not made up,“ said the porter. “How do you do, Mr. Roberts?” placidly said the “great unruffled.” “How do you do, sir ?” said the possessor of the last name on the registeJr. “Really, you have the greatest, hotel on earth.” “Now, there, you are right,” was the response. “Show the gentleman to 108. -—Chicago Tribune.

Wanted a Chance.

In the smoking car of a Michigan Central train a Detroit man got to going on the political situation, and as a crowd gathered around him he kept his chin working away for a full half hour without a stop. Finally- a stranger came up to him and whispered in his ear: “Cut it short, my friend—cut it short.” The Detroiter launched forth with a new idea, but at the end of ten minutes the same man whispered again : “Say, friend, aren’t yon going to divide up ? I want a chance at this crowd.” “Eh? Do you belong to the opposite partv ?” “No, sir—Pm a three-card monte man, tod I want to work the crowd and get off at Jackson.” He was given a chance.— Free Press.

Heng Kong’s Prosperity.

Hong Kong occupies an enviable distinction. It is one of the very few eommunit’es in the world which is absolutely without a public d bt. On the contrary, it possesses a balance fund invested at interest, and amounting to £209,000, which is nearly equal to a year’s revenue. During forty years of the reign of the Queen, between 1843

and 1883, the city of'Victoria, in Hong Kong, which was not in existence at the time of her Majesty’s accession, has added to the British empire a vast shipping trade. The tonnage of the shipping entered at the port of Hong Kong in 1882 was nearly 5,000,000, a total larger than the tonnage of the shipping entered at the port of London in 1837, or six years before the annexation of the colony to the British crown, and when the island was a desolate rock uninhabited save by a few Chinese pirates and fishermen.— London Letter to the Manchester Courier.

“Pumps.”

“Do you think you can sell dressgoods and ribbons?” inquired Mr. Nathan Watrous, senior member of the retail firm of Watrous & McGill. The party addressed was a florid young man, ■with a florid nose, florid mustache, and florid hair. He was, in short, quite a Florida youth, and his name was Theopolis Duggan. “I reckon so, ” he replied. “ Can von. be sauve ?” “Which?” “Can you support a becoming address in the presence of ladies—politeness, sauvity, you know?” “O, yes,” answered Duggan, “in the last place I worked the boys all said I was the sauviest man in the troupe, and a rustler among the customers.” “"What business was it?” “Pumps—wooden and iron pumps, and hydraulic rams.” “Quite a different line from dress"goods and ribbons.” “Well, yes, but I ain’t afeared to tackle ’em. Mr. Watrous gave him a trial. The boys in the store labeled, him “Pumps” from the first moment of his initiation into the dress-goods and ribbons department, The second day a petite brunette inquired for some “chicken down” nun’s veiling. Pumps commenced to sweat. “What color is it!” he blurted out. The girl only rewarded him with a stony stare. Pumps rushed off after a new stock of information, and inquired: “Is this a provision store or a butcher shop?” “Why?” answered a one-hundred-and-fifteen-pound salesman. “Because, there’s a gal up there by the show-case who wants some chicken down.” The 115 pounds of pure and unadulterated sauvity waited on her. “Show me some elephant’s breath cashmere,” said an elderly lady in goldbowed spectacles. Pumps dropped a roll of paper cambric and again started down the road after some more intelligence. “What’s elephant’s breath ?” he gasped. “Hanged if I ain’t thinkin’ I’ve struck a menagerie.” “It’s a shade of woolen goods,” murmured another salesman, moving up toward the elderly lady, and selling her a large bill. “Bet your boots I’ll catch on,” said Pumps, swaggering before the glass where the ladies tried on bonnets and hats. Another young lady interviewed Pumps in the afternoon and said: “You know steel sSutache on gray velvet is considered very chic.” “It’s just the chiekiest thing agoin’,” observed Pumps. The young lady looked grieved. “Show me some giraffe-colored cashmere,” she said, quietly. “Another animal wanted,” muttered Pumps, breathlessly, as he reached the other end of the store. He, of course, lost the sale. “Show nje some crinolettes,” demanded a spare woman with a cast in one eye. Pumps was nonplused. “If I was you I wouldn’t get a crinolette,” he ventured. “Yoii wouldn’t!” sneered the lady. ”No, not at this season of the year. I’d get a pair of striped stockings and a poke bonnet.” The lady walked out. “What did she want?” inquired Mr. Watrous, who had kept his eagle eye on the proceeding. ■‘Slio was hankerin’ after a crinolette,” said Pumps, “and I don’t think we have ’em in stock.” “These are crinolettes,” said Mr Wat ? rous, sternly, and pointing to a pile of the garments. “Them! Why, I took them for base ball masks,” said Pumps. “You will have to do better than this,” remarked Mr. Watrous, impressively. “There is a woman up at the front end who wants .some Apollinaria. Hadn’t I better go out and get her a glass of seizor ?” Some mor6 condensed suavity waited on the lady, and sold her polonaise, a moliere waistcoat, an oatrich feather fan, and ten yards of plum-colored velveteen. Pumps was paralyzed. “You fellows have got the thing down pretty middlin’fine,” he.said, pulling his vermilion mustache before the mirror. , “Evidently you have considerable to learn in. this business,” observed th© head salesman to Pumps. “All I ask is a fair show for my money,” returned Pumps, dejectedly. “What would you do if a lady should inquire for an imported jersey ?*” “What are you giving us ?” whined Pumps, “this is no stock yard or dairy ”That', my friend,” said the head salesman, “is a short jacket, introduced into this country by Mrs. Langtry. What if she should inquire for a tournure?” “Me—oh, I’d-—” “That will do!” shouted Mr. Watrous, bobbing up from behind a bale of sheeting, “you can tournuije back on this establishment and hunt work in a lumber yard.”— Texas Siftings.

Why He Wouldn’t Get Up.

Domestic midnight scene: “Robert, you get up now and carry the baby awhile; I’m tired out.” “I can’t, Jenny; I’ve got the headache.” “So have I the headache; still I must keep up. It’s as much your baby as it is mine. J “No. it isn’t. It’s a girl. If it was a boy I’d carry it all night ” “So you are still angry about that. Oh, dear me!”— Christian at Work.

The Fern-Gully of Melbourne.

Melbourne, the capital of Victoria, possesses a large and beautiful botanic garden, which, under the management of Mr. Guilfoyle, as the London Garden informs us, has been so remodeled and beautified that it now ranks among the most picturesquely planted gardens in the world. Esch class of plants is, so far as practicable, grouped by itself. The place devoted to Ferns is a naturally favorable location—a gully of about 300 feet in length, the average width ,of the Fem-ground on either side being about fifty feet. A meandering pathway, some 900 feet in length, crosses and recrosses the gully every here and there. Along this narrow pathway one passes under the beautiful green fronds of native Tree Ferns, Dicksonia antarctica, Atrophila australis, etc., the trunks of which stand like so many columns on either side. A large number of these and other Tree Ferns of various heights, from one to fifteen feet, many of which are indigenous to New Zealand and Norfolk Island, are planted along the water-course, as well as promiscuously over the whole Fernground. On the trunks of the Tree Ferns, and also in the forks and on the stems of most of the large, umbrageous trees which have been placed about in order to provide shade for and protection from undue exposure of the Fernshave been fixed hundreds of the Queens, land and New South Wales epiphytal Ferns, Platycerium grande and alcicorne (the Elk’s-horn and Stag’s-horn Ferns), and Asplenium nidus (the Bird’s-nest Fern); while all over the gully som.e thousands of hardy outdoor Ferns, including Lomarias, Aspleniums, Asphidiums, Blechnums, Dooddias, Polypodiums, Pteris, etc., have been planted extensively as an undergrowth. A perforated pipe is placed all around the edge of the Fern-ground, by which the place is conveniently watered by the mere turning on of taps. At almost any point along the narrow, meandering pathway beautiful vistas may be had, while from either of the large walks which pass across the gully charming views of Ferns, with glimpses of the lake and rustic bridges in the distance, serve to make some of the most beautiful natural pictures one could desire to look upon.

The Rain-Tree.

Some travelers in South America, in traversing an arid and desolate tract of country, were struck with a strange contrast. Ou one hand there was a barren desert, on the other a rich and luxuriant vegetation. This remarkable contrast was due to the presence of the Tamai Caspi, or the Rain tree. This tree often grows to the height of sixty feet, with a diameter of three feet at its base, and possesses the power of strongly attracting, absorbing and condensing the atmosphere. Water is always to be seen dripping from its trunk and branches in such quantities as to convert the surrounding soil into a veritable marsh. This tree also grows in the Canary islands and other tropical climates, where it seems like a God-send to the poor people, who must almost perish from thirst during the dry season, were it not for this curious water supply. And what seems most remarkable of all, is that during the hot season, when the streams and lakes are most or quite dried up, the tree is most active, and sends forth abundant supplies of water.

The Tails of Comets.

The spectroscope has furnished us with the only evidence as to the material of which the tails of comets are composed. Several, which from their- remarkable development have deserved to be noted as great comets, have had multiplied tails, or streams flowing from the same head, but separating so as often to be distinguished by the unaided eye. These were supposed to be formed of different chemical elements, and the spectroscope has shown that such is actually the case. Thus when the comet has an abundant supply of hydrogen the finest of tails are produced; others are formed of carbon, chlorine, or even of iron as principal ingredients. Philadelphia Times.

A Voice from the Northwest.

Milwaukee, Wis.—The Daily Sentinel, which is the leading morning paper of this State, writes \ “St. Jacobs Oil, the wonderful remedy for rheumatism, has been used by a large number of people in this city, and with effect truly marvelous. ”

High Treason.

A European, who was about to start for America, was asked by an acquaintance : “And do yon think fried pigeons will fly into your mouth over there?” “Oh, no. I don’t believe that; but if one should fly there. I’d have the privilege of eating him myself. I’ll not have to give two-thirds of the pigeon to the nobility and gentry, and the rest to the robbers. Texas Siftings. The name of the Gladiolus, one of °ur most popular and beautiful summer«blpoming bulbs.is almost invariably mispronounced. The accent should be on the second syllable instead of the first, thus, Gla-df-o-lus, The name is derived from the Latin word Gladius, a iisword, on account of the peculiar sword-like shape of the foliage. The sunbeam is composed of millions of minute rays; so home-light must be constituted of little tendernesses, kindly looks, sweet laughter and loving words.

A Valuable Medical Treatise.

The edition for 18S4 of the sterling Medical Animal, known as Hostetter’s Almanac, is now ready, and may be obtained, free of cost, of druggists and general country dealers in all parts of the United States, Mexico, and indeed in every civilized portion of the Western hemisphere. This Almanac has been issued regularly at the commencement of every year for over one-fifth of a century. It combines, with the soundest practical advice for the preservation and restoration of health, a large amount of interesting and amusirg light reading, and the calendar, astronomical calculations, chronological items, «fcc., ard prepared with great care, and will lie found entirely accurate. The issue of Hostetter’s Almanac for 1884 will probably be the largest edition of a medical work ever published in any country. The proprietors, Messrs. Hostetter & Smith, Pittsburgh, Pa., on receipt of a 2 cent stamp, will forward a copy by mail to any person who cannot procure one in his neighborhood.

A TERRIBLE PROPHECY.

The Red Sunsets, Cyclones and Earthquakes Foretelling Coming Disaster— How to Meet It. The recent mysterious appearances following sunset and preceding sunrise have attracted wide attention from students of the skies and the people generally. During the days of recent weeks the sun seems to have been ots ?ured by a thin veil, of a dull, leaden hue, which, as the sun receded toward the horizon, became more luminous, then yellow, then orange, then red; and, as night settled down upon the earth, a dull purple. At first it was thought these appearances were ordinary sunset reflections of light; but it is now pretty certain that they are either tte misty substance of the tail of some unseen comet, in which the earth is enveloped, or a surrounding stratum of world dust, or very small meteors. Prof. Brooks, of the Red House Observatory, Phelps, N. Y., has turned his telescope upon these objects, and discovciel what he thinks are myriads of telescopic meteors. If it is unorganized world dust, or decomposed vapors, as the Democrat and Chronicle, of Rochester, N. Y., remarks: “How is this matter to be disposed of? Will it settle and form a deposit upon the earth, or remain a partial opaque shell about the earth, to cut off a portion of the sun's light upon it?" Whatever the mystery is, there is no denying that some very strange forces are at work in the upper airs. The terrible tornadoes and cyclones which have swept our country, and the fearful volcanoes and earthquakes which have destroyed so many cities and thousands of people—the tidal waves which mysteriously rise and fall on coasts hitherto unvexed by them—the tremendous activity which is evident in the sun by the constant revelation of enormous spots upon its surface —all indicate unusual energy in the heavenly bodies. These circumstances recall Prof. Grimmer’s prophecies, that from 1881 to 1887 the passage of the five great planets—Mars, Neptune, Jupiter, Uranus and Saturn—around the sun would produce strange and wonderful phenomena. He says: “The waters of the earth will become more or less poisonous. The air will be foul with noisome odors. Ancient race< will disappear from the earth.” He attempts to prove his prophecy by the fact tha’t in 1720, when Mars and Saturn made their passage around the sun coincidentally, great destruction and mortality visited all parte of the globe. He also found the same results in previous perihelion passages of the planets, and argues that these circumstances always produce epidemics and destructive diseases which will baffle the skill of the most eminent physicians; that the poor will die by thousands, the weak and intemperate falling first, those whose blood has been impoverished by excess of work or dissipation next, and only those who are in comparative vigor shall escape to enjoy the era of renewed activity and prosperity which will follow the period of destruction. Inasmuch as the entire world seems subject to the sway of the heavenly bodies no part of the earth, he thinks, cs.n escape scourging. He even predicts that America will lose over 10,000,000 of people; that farmers will be Stricken with fear and cease to till the soil; that famine will make human misery more wretched. That hundreds will flee to overcrowded cities for aid in vain. That sudden changes in ocean currents, temperature and surroundings will entirely transform the face of nature and climate of countries; that the air will be so foul with malaria and other noxious gases, that those who survive will be troubled with disorders of the digestive organs. That many who escape other ills will bloat with dropsy and suddenly pass away, while others will grow thin and drag out a miserable existence in indescribable agony for weeks. Neuralgic paips in different parts of the body will torment them. They will easily tire and become despondent. A faint, hot feeling will be succeeded by chilly sensations, while hallucinations and dread of impending ill will paralyze all effort. “The birds in the air, the beasts of the field and even the fish of the sea will become diseased, poisoning the air and poisoning the waters of the globe.” We are told on the other hand that those who shall pass through this period of trial will have larger enjoyment of life and health. The earth will yield more abundantly than ever before. The animal kingdom will be more prolific and life prolonged very materially. This prolongation of life will be owing to the healthy electric and magnetic influences that will pervade the atmosphere. It would, perhaps, seem that the present rdfiness of the sun, and the presence of a belt or veil of cosmic matter, justified, in a measure, the prediction of Prof. Grimmer, but disturbing as h!s prediction may be we are told for our comfort that the strong and pure-blooded need have little to fear in these calamities, that those who are delicate or indisposed should adopt means to keep the system well supported and the blood pure and that the most philosophical and effective method of accomplishing this is to keep the kidneys and liver in good condition. From the tejtimonials of such men as Dr. Dio Lewis and Prof. R. A. Gunn, M. D., Dean of the United States Medical college, New York, and thousands of influential non-professlonal people, it seems almost ce.'tain that for this purpose there is no preparation known to science equal to Warner’s Safe Cure, better known as Warner’s Safe Kidney and Liver Cure. This medicine' has acquired the finest reputation of any preparation that was ever put upon the market. It is a radical blood purifier, which soothes and heals all inflamed organs, strengthens the nervous system, washes out all evidences of decay, regulates digestion, prevents malassimilation of food in a philosophical and rational manner, fortifies the system against climatic changes and malarial influences and the destructive agencies which seem to be sq abundant in these “evil days.” It is not our purpose to dispute the correctness of Prof. Grimmer’s prophecies. As we have said, the tnarked disturbances of' the past few years would seem to give a semblance of verification of his theory. It is certain, as above stated, that we are passing through what may be regarded as a crucial period and it is the part of wise men not to ignore, but to learn to fortify themselves against the possibility of being overcome by these evils. It is a duty which each man owes to himself, and his fellows, to mitigate as much as possible the suffering of humanity; and in no way better can he accomplish this purpose than to see u> it that he, himself, is fortified by the best known preparation in the strangest possible manner, and that he exert the influence of bls own example upon his fellows to the end that they, too, may sharp with him immunity from thedestructive influences which seek his ruin. There is net always honor among thieves. A society reporter is something of a pirate himself; yet he frequently attacks private ears. —The Judge. There is talk of lynching the man who evolved this toast: “ Our fire-engines, may they be like old maids—ever ready, but never wanted.” Mb. Oliver Mvers, of Ironton, 0., says: “Samaritan Nervine cured me of general debility." , Emerson said: “ There is always room for a man of force." He had probably met Sullivan in a crowd. — Kinderhook Notes. “It quiets the patient and J.timately cures him." A late encomium on Samaritan Nervine. “I am the power behind the throne,” soliloquized the mule, as he pitched his rider heels over head to the ground.— Fulton Times.

The Best in the World.

Dr. J. W. Hamilton, of Merrillan, Wig., says: I have sold Warner’s White Wine Tar Syrup for years. It is the best cough medicine in the world and has no equal for asthma. From Cal. C. H. Mackey, Thirty-eecond lowa Infantry: I have derived more benfite from Ely’s Cream Balm than anything else”! Lave ever tried. I have now been usin'# it for three months and am experiencing.no trouble from Catarrh whatever. I have been a sufferer for twenty years.—C. H. Mackey, Sigourney, lowa, Feb. 22, ’B2. A baldreaded man, who has heard that the hairs of a man’s head are numbered, wants to know if there is not some place where be can obtain the back numbers. Carboline will supply the demand. I» a cough disturbs your sleep, take Piso’s Cure for Consumption and rest well.

Rescued from Death.

william J- Coughlin, of Somerville, Maas., says: In the fall *f 1878 I was taken with bleeding of lungs, followed by a severe coughI lost my appetite and flesh, and was confined to my bed. In 1877 I was admitted to the hospital. The doctors said 1 had a hole in my lung as big as a half dollar. At one time a report went around that I was dead. I gave up hope, but a friend told me of Dr. WinHall’s Balsam for the Lungs. I got a bottle’ when, to my surprise, I commenced to fee 1 better, and to-day I feel better than for three years past.

“Put up" at the Gault House.

The business man or tourist will find firstclass accommodations at the low price of $2 and $2.50 per day at the Gault House, Chicago, corner Clinton and Madison streets. This far-famed hotel is located in the center of the city, only one block from the Union Depot. Elevator; all appointments first-class. H. W. Hoyt, Proprietor.

Universally Approved.

J. A. Rogers, M. D„ of Kenton, Ohio, says: I must say Warner’s White Wine of Tai Syrup has been universally approved by my customers: never hear any complaints about it here; sold it for years. Pube Cod-Liver Oil, made from selected livers on the sea-shore, by Casweia., Hazard & Co., New York. It is absolutely pure and sweet Patients who have once taken it prefer it to all others. Physicians have decided it superior to any of the other oils in market For three winter < I have been afflicted with Catarrh and Cold in the Head. 1 used Ely’s Cream Balm; it accomplished all that was represented. T. F. McCormick (Judge Common Plea’s), Elizabeth, N. J. (Price 50 cents.) Chapped Hands, Face, Pimples, and rough Skin, cured by using Juniper Tab Soap, made by Caswell, Hazard &, Co., New York. ■ -•> A .in ■ First effectual, then good to take, then cheap—Piso’s Cure for Consumption.

RSOB FOR Rheumatism, Neuralgia, Sciatica, Lumbago, Backache, Headache, Toothache, Bare Th resat. !»*■• Burns. Ncnlda. Fi-ort Bites, AND ALL OTHER BODILY FAINS AND ACHES. Saldbr Dreiatata and Dealersererrwhere. Filly Cenua bottln. Directions in 11 LauriMeaTHE CHARLES A. VOGELKR CO. «IIT w A. VOOELEE A CO.) Baltimore, ■<!., C. S. A. NiSvSR < (ngflißEAf) 18. V (H|E|R|V|E) I \ (COHQUEBOR.) I A SPECIFIC FOR ST EPILEPSY, SPASMS, CONVULSIONS, FALLING SICKNESS, ST. VITUS DANCE. ALGHOHOLISM. OPIUM EATING, SCROFULA, KINGS EVIL, UGLY BLOOD DISEASES, DYSPEPSIA, NERVOUSNESS, SICK HEADACHE, RHEUMATISM, NERVOUS WEAKNESS, NERVOUS PROSTRATION, RRAIN WORRY, BLOOD SORES, BILIOUSNESS, COSTIVENESS, KIDNEY TROUBLES AND IRREGULARITIES. per bottle.'Tßß ~~ For testimonials and circulars send stamp. The Dr. S. A. Richmond Med, Co., Props,, 3k£o. (11) Correspondence freely answered by Physicians. Sold by all Druggists. THE FIRESIDE, Matrimonial Paper. Sample, 10c. FIRESIDE PUB’G 00., Newton Upper Falls, Mass, AGENTS WANTED for the best and fastest-selling Pictorial Books and Bibles. Pricesgreduced 8S percent. National Pchlishimg Co, Chicago, DI. STEEL ENGRAVINGS for XMAS or Scrap Books free tor postage, (J cents. Send to BROWN, Box, 11. H„ Philadelphia, Pa. Vnimcr Man learnTxijioiiathy here ana T OUDg Iwien we will jzlv 3 you a situation. Circulars free. VALENTINE BROS., Janesville, Wis. , f TTMTO HO PATENT, NO PAY! I* a I pMB i m R. 9. *A. P. LACEY, Patent ■ • JMI ■ • W Attonieys, Washington,D.C. Full instructions and Hand-Book of Patents sent free. I CURE FJTSI When I say cur«T <o not mean merely to stop them lor a time and then have them return again, I mean a radical cure. I have made the disease ot FITS. EFILEFSY er FALLING SICKNESS a life-long study. ' warrant my remedy to enra the worst cases. Because ethers have failed Is no reason for not now receiving a cure. Send at once for a treatise and a Free Bottle of my Infallible remedy. Give Express and Post Office. It costs you nothing for a trial, and I will cure yon. IF Address Dr. H. G. BOOT, IM Pearl St, gew York * ■. Lay the Axe * 'to the Root If you would destroy the cankering worm. For anyexternal pain, sore, wound or lameness of man or beast, use only MEXICAN MUSTANG LINIMENT. It penetrates all muscle and flesh to the very bone, expelling all inflammation, soreness and pain, and healing the diseased part as no other Liniment ever did or can. So saith the experience of two generations of sufferers, and so will yon say when you have tried the “ Mustang.

ALLEN’S Lung Balsam! A 600 D FAMILY REMEDY! THAT WILL CURE—COUGHS, COLDS, CROUP, his Mrnd-to Irv F«lm.»»ry Cowumpiloa Allm’?Linr Balum after Ml and wm pronounowl l.rahim. We hare hi. letter >■ ». that it at one. cured hh rurlihl? W w“ S »»le to mum< nu pra. W ( b«t ia the U ‘* y ’ world. CONSUMPTION. 1 Pi - that tokww .111 Zatieerille, Ohio, write ... .V. T”? ■ of the our. of MoUblu eXd Frwniau, . well iw.» .r!„ I rfdwen. who had b~u> as- ■ ffieU ? wlUßra. r .b 1 1b... taken the Balsam and been MW curwl him mtl ban cured cured, lie think, allwtaf- <ffi| ulh,r * U “'“*■ dieted should give * ALLEN’S LUNG BALSAM Is harmless to the most dellcat* child! It contains no Opium in any form! Recommended by Phyelelane, Mlnlatere and Naraea. In fact by everybody who hat given it a good trial. It Never Adie le Bring Belief. As an Expectorant it has no EqualSOLD BY ALL MEDICINE DEALERS. MONTH. Agents Wanted. 90 beat \ / Hll selling articles in the world. 1 sample Flthh. Vi.UU Address JAY BRONSON, Detroit. Mwu. ORGAN AGEINTS Wanted in every County. REED’S TEMDEE OE, MUSIC, 139 State Street, CHICAGO. beard eEMi AfterU Forw loxwnaat UuMaeba. Whi.- ■fUCot, h S’AKe» fl W® SI tlk * *wh. Wlit prove it ar Awfbit SIOv.OU. Frit* par Perltage with Mirretrons aaalsd aad p*«Kiu t-eaae, • ter W MU. L. 5. u SMITH a CO.. Arwu. I'.l.Mm. 111. H MIK WHUi All ElUMia, BT IjM Beet Cough By run. Tastes good. IZJ Use in time. Sold by dnigyists, .CONSUMPTION*. W I have a po.ltlvs remedy for the above dlaosae; by It, UM thousands of cases of the wornt kind and ot long standing have been cured. Indeed, eo strong 1. my fnltu In Its efficacy, that I will Mti.l TWO BOTTLK3 FHEK. together with a VALUABLE.TKEATISK on thia dtouuw, t<* any eufferor Give Expreaa and F. O. addroaa. PE. T. A. SLOCUM. U 1 Fear! Bt.. New York. —-■ ——> ■ ■ people have become rich working for uh. We offer you a bu.-mer. >jyU®ji ft Ml M wUii'ti is easy to leant—one juiymg IB K VC yoularge bums ot ipom-y in pi olti-. 4 tB M B I Kvery one who is willing to woik nJ? E cangetrtch. lien, women nnu n boys and g rls.a'e making fortunes. Nocapitil required, "o wi .l start yon in the I tininess. You run no risk whatever. Yo-, need not be sway front home. Fuil particulars free W. V. R. POWIS, 89 Randolph St., Chicago, lil. A copy of Bijou edition .of GODEY’SB Send sc. stamp to Publisher. Box H. 11., PMludelpliio, Pa, CHRISTMAS THE YEAR ROUIID. " gL. BAB YL AND Our Little Men and Women ./JS SSSTHE PANSY t'ooni. Folks WIDE , Address D. LOTHROP & CO., Boston, Mast. CThe Oldest Medicine in the World it MR| probably Ur. Isaac ThoinpNoii’s IM elebrated Eye Watell This article is a carefully prepared physician’s prescription, and has been in couHtant use for nearly u century, and notwithstanding the many other preparations that have been introduced into the market, the sa eof this article is constantly increasing. If the directions are followed it will never fail. We particularly invite the attention of physicians to its merits. John L. Thompson, Sons Co., Troy, N. Y CHICAGO SCALE CO. TH® 1 S TON WAGON SCALE, o*o. ■ TON, 060. Ton 800, Ueain Box Included. DBtectfve,*! «00 OTHER 81Z&». R»dured PRICE LIST FKKM. FORGES, TOOLS. &c. f fyifn BEST FORCE MADE FOR LIGHT WORE, «!•. lazffi I 4Olb. Anvil nnd Kit of Tools. 810. Ifflß I 1 Farmer. tin, and mnney doing odd job». I®H-J Blowers. Anvil-- Vices a Other Articles LOWEST PRICED, WHOLESALE * RETAIL. A THE BEST. WILOUN © LIGHTNING SEWER I Two tkouaand atltehes a minute. The onlyabsolutely flrat-elaaa Mewing Maaehlne In the world. Senton trlnl. Warranted A yeara. Send for Illnatmteii (!nta!o -u» and Ulrenlnr WII.SON SEWING MACHINE CO.. Chicago or Mew York. iiJ-TMBBiJlliiiii- Tni ® Ncw |gz~ TRUSS Hm a Fad dlff.rlng from .11 nlb.r., I. c«pahi>p. f with S.lf-AdJu.Uny ball @ tn Mntar, adapia lueif io all pwtloa. ■iwKMMISLEK o f th. body, wbll. th. llti t.i Uthe Hernia Is held Mcnrely day and aigkt. and a ndlaal earn eertaln. 11 is ea»y, durable and oh.ap. Bent by siail. CUvulart *"■* Eggleston Truss Co., Chicago,. iiL, 8 Thia porous plaster is MB ‘absolutely tie best ever made, combining tho M a virtncn of hops with DI AQTri> gums, balsams and ex- ■ ■ «sl*| treats. Its power is wonderfnl la curing diseases wherw other plasters simply relieve. Crick in the Back and’ Week, nln In the Side or Limbs, Stfff Joints and Muscles, Kidney Troubles, Rheumatism, Noumlgio, Sole Cheat, Affections of tho Heart and Uvor, and all pains or acheain any nort cured Instantly by the Bop Plaster. GF Try' ■ ja ma| y it. Price 25 cents or five for RLW. EL Mnltod en receipt of price. Sold by all druggirts and country stores. 13 Ab-K Eop Plaster, Compann, ( Proprietor#, Boston, Maat tyFor constipation, loss of appetite and dlsease»of ’.he bowels taJte Hawley’s Stomach and Liver Pl I Is. 25 cents. B— ELY’S[REAMBALM hen applied l>y the tiger into the nostrils, ill boah.sorbed.effecially cleansing the esd of catarrhal virus, lusiug healthy »»<;reons/lt allave infiamation, protects the lembrane of the nasal tssagea from adflional colds, oomplete- - heals the sores, and stores sense of taste id smell. OT A MQUIP M> SNUFF. A few applications sieve. A thorough Satmeni wUI cure. jreeabletouae. Bend tor circular. Price 50 cents. b*Y»siLorat. druggists. ELY BROTHERS, Drnggists. Owego, N.Y. CIkM’ 1 ; ‘ No. 68-H3. VTTHEN TO ADVERTISERS W pleaM aay you naw the odvertUemettl * in thia paper.