Democratic Sentinel, Volume 7, Number 31, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 31 August 1883 — Obsequious Jones. [ARTICLE]

Obsequious Jones.

Jones, who is reading the morning paper: “I declare, poor Smith, is dead. I’ll have to go to his funeral.” “You don’t have to go, do you?" asked Mrs. Jones. > K “Yes, I have to go to- Smith’s fnneral, for he did as muchfor me. He was kind enough to attend my funeral, and I shall always be grateful to him for it.” “What stuff is that? How could he attend your funeral?” “It’s the simplest thing in the world. Last summer, I didn’t die precisely, but another man named Jones did. Smith thought it was my funeral, and went to it. Now, Smith has died, and I am going to get even with him. ” “But, perhaps, this Smith who has died is not the Smith you know. ” “That’s all the better. I hope it is some other Smith that I don’t know." “Why so?” “Because I am not so busy nsw, and have plenty of time this afternoon to attend funerals. I’ll have it off my mind, and when my friend Smith really does die, I’ll not be bothered tramping a mile and a half out to the cemetery.” —Texas Siftings. Hannibal Hamlin, while in the Senate, spent four or five hours every day in writing letters, and it was his boast that he answered every letter he received. It was painful to see him write. He squeezed his pen as though it was money, and his hand, arm, and body were all so unnaturally distorted that it seemed a shame that he did not employ a secretary, but he ’worked away, hour by hour, until he had got done with his mail.