Democratic Sentinel, Volume 7, Number 27, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 3 August 1883 — I Am the Doctor, Madam. [ARTICLE]

I Am the Doctor, Madam.

Surgeon Blank lVas noted for his success with the ladies. He never liked to poke along at the rear of the regiment in accordance with regulation rule, and was finally made Brigade Surgeon for no better reason than that he might ride with the General at the head of the column. This increased his opportunities for forming acquaintances, and, as he remarked, enlarged his circle of usefulness. On one occasion as the General, staff and escort were riding easily through a pleasant country, some distance in advance of the infantry, a fire of musketry brought the detachment to a halt. The cavalry were ordered to go forward and discover what the trouble was, with instructions to report to the General at a house near which they had stopped. The cavalry went, and the General, sending instructions to the regimental commanders behind, went with the staff officers into the house. They sat near the fire in a large room. Opposite the fire was a low bed on which reclined a woman apparently sick. She had a comely face, and did not appear to be suffering much. The surgeon was quick to see the advantage he-possessed over the officers. Laying aside his hat and gloves, he assumed a professional air and approached the invalid. “I am the surgeon, madam. Are you sick.?” No answer. The doctor repeated: “I am the doctor, madam; perhaps I can help you.” The woman did not seem to hear him. Conscious of the smiles of his fellow-officers, and conscious, too, that he was very much confused, the doctor, in a sort of desperation, repeated: “I am the doctor, madam; I am the physician; I am the surgeon, you know.” Even this emphatic statement elicited no reply. The doctor thereupon took up the hand of the woman, and proceeded to feel her pulse, saying, as he seated himself in a chair near the bed: “I am a doctor, and I think I can help you.” At last the woman turned her head and said in a twanging, doubting tone: “Be you, now? Then you air the nineteenth doctor who has felt my pulse this morning.” The doctor retired abashed. The bummers had passed over the road, and every bummer had represented himself as a doctor, and had felt the woman’s pulse and gravely expressed his conviction that he could help her. The firing in front was caused by bummers who had been practicing on running porkers. The doctor heard this report, and, forgetting to prescribe for the woman, left the house and was the first man to resume the forward movement. — Chi- . cago Inter Ocean.