Democratic Sentinel, Volume 7, Number 23, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 6 July 1883 — Waiting on the Combination. [ARTICLE]

Waiting on the Combination.

An editor, who had procured a Hall’s safe on an advertisment, is toying with the combination. Man waiting .to collect a bill. “Eighteen times slow, to the right stop at 32 j, ” the editor soliloquizes. “ ‘Copy!” yells the boy who up the paper. Hastily abandoning the safe, the editor cuts out a half-column article from an exchange, marksit “editorial,”hands to the boy and return to the combination. “Let’s see,” he muses, “stop at 324 Yes, that’s right. Now, then, to the left 15 times slow past 32| stop at 16 1,” and then, looking up at the collector, he paused and inquired, “How much is that bill of yourn ?” “Two dollars.” “Can’t you come in to-morrow? I haven’t any change about me, and I don’t like ask you to wait until I open my safe.” “Just as leave wait as not,” responded the collector. “Beside,” continued the editor, “I haven’t anything less than a $lO9 bill in the safe. Break a SIOO note?” “Yes, two of ’em,” was the disheartening response. “All right. Lemme see, 16$. Then to the right past 16 J —but hold up, seems to me half of that bill was to be taken out in advertising. How is that?” “No such thing.” “Sure?” “Yes. lam.” “Very well. Then to the right past 17j, fourteen times to the left, stop at 75. Look here, ”to the collector, “better come in to-morrow. This is an accommodation combination—stops at all the stations, and, beside that, it’s flagged every few minutes,” he added, as the boy called him out to see “that woman with some more poetry.” Thirty-five minutes later he re-ap-pears with an arm-load of mixed poetry. • “You couldn’t wait till I read this, could you?” he asks, “or maybe you’d like to skim through it yourself?” he added. , But the collector said he felt fainty like, and would just sit still and wait until the safe was opened. “Oh, you will, will you? Correct--75, then to the right past 75 thirtyeight times slow, stop at 994; then to left past 99 J a hundred and sixty-eight times, stop at 43; then to the right past 43—Say! I’d ruther you’d come in tomorrow. I’m a little pushed for time now. Can’t wait ? Then to the right past 43 six hundred and twenty-two times, stop at 13. This is a long stretch of country I’m going over now, ” said the editor, as he whirled the knob, “but when I get to 13 I’ll be nearly half through—confound it, I’ve passed it! Have to begin all over now. Eighteen times slow to the right, stop at 321—” ’ “Hold on there! Stop right where you are,” interposed the collector; “I’ll come in some time next month;” and he left. “It’s my opinion that no newspaper office is complete without one of these combination lock safes,” soliloquized the editor, as he deftly turned the knob twice, opened the safe and got out his last cigar. Cincinnati Saturday Night.