Democratic Sentinel, Volume 7, Number 17, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 25 May 1883 — [?]N EXACT WITNESS. [ARTICLE]

[?]N EXACT WITNESS.

A Scene in an Arkansas Court. A descendant of the ancient squatter who, like his predecessor, has from earliest recollection been living on lands whose title is just ftbout as genuine as the title of the average Colonel, was summoned before court as a witness. The old man had heard a great deal of courts, and how it was the aim of lawyers to “ketch a feller in a lie and make fun of him,” and he was resolved not to allow himself to be disgraced. •, “What is your name?” asked the lawyer. “Which one? I*ve got several.” “The one that you sign ?” “I don’t sign none; I can’t write.” “Is your name Peggleton ?” w “That’s part of it.” “What is the other part?” “You guessed so .»well the first time, now guess again.” “The summons says that your name is Josiah Peggie ton; is that correct?” . “I reckon it.is.” “You have known the prisoner a long time, I understand.” “I never seed the prisoner before.” “Look out, sir, you’ll perjure yourself. It is well known that you nave been intimate with the man Jackson.” “Yes, I know Jackson mighty well.” “Thought you never saw him before ?” “I didn’t say it.” a “Yes, you did. Your exact words were, Tnever saw the prisoner before.’ ” “I never did, for he wasn’t > prisoner when I seed him.” “Ah, a very fine construction. See that you continue to be so particular. Did you see the quarrel between Jackson and Alrichs ?” “No, sir; never seed it. ” “Look out, sir, look out! Were you present when the two men quarreled, and fought?” “I was thar.” “Thought yoii said that you didn’t see the quarrel ?” “I didn’t see it. I heard it.” “You are very exact. We’ll see how far your analysis will serve you. I understand then that you heard the quarrel?” “I don’t know.” “Didn’t you say that you heard it ?” “Yes, but I don’t know what you understand.” “How far apart were they standing?” “I didn’t measure it.” “How far do you think ?” “I don’t-think.”

“Your Honor,” exclaimed the lawyer, “I wish you would impress upon this man the importance of answering mj questions. The result of this case depends much upon his testimony.” “Mr. Peggleton,” said the Judge, “you must tell what you know about the fight in a straightforward manner.” “You’re the Judge, I reckon?” “Yes, I’m the Judge.” “An’ you want me to tell what I know about this fight in a straightforward manner? Well, the fight wasn’t in a straightforward manner, for you never seed sich a scratchin’ ana twistin’ around. The two men met, ; cussed each other, and fit. They fit because they ensued, but I don’t know why they cussed. One knocked the other down, and then the other knocked him down. Then they fit. Arter awhile the other one fell and got up and knocked him down. Then they fit. About this time the thing got sorter interestin’, and I sortv wanted to jine hands myself, but I didn’t. Arter awhile they stopped, and cussed while they was restin’. Then they fit agin, an’ both of them fell over a chunk. I couldn’t keep out any longer. The temptation was too strong, and while they layied on the ground I gethered a pole an’ says, ‘here’s to you, boys,’ and hit both of ’em at once. Then I jumped the fence an’ run away, and that’s all I know about the fight. Thank you for your perlite attention, ” apd before he could be restrained he had left the court-room.— Arkansaw Traveler,