Democratic Sentinel, Volume 6, Number 48, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 29 December 1882 — How Not to Talk to Children. [ARTICLE]

How Not to Talk to Children.

One day I sat in -a car seat on the Eastern road behind a pale, care-worn lady who was taking a little boy from Bostoji to Malden. As the little boy was of a very inquiring mind, and everything seemed to attract his attention, I could not help listening to some of his questions. “What is that, auntie?” the little boy commenced, pointing to a stack of hay on the marsh. “Oh, that’s hay, dear,” answered the care-worn lady. “What is hay, auntie?” “ Why, hay is hay, dear.” “But what is hay made of?” “Why, hay is made of dirt sind water and air.” “Who makes it?” “God makes it, dear.” “Does he make it in the day time or in the night ?” “In both, dear.” “And Sundays?” “Yes, all the time.” “Ain’t it wicked to make hay on Sunday, auntie?” “O, I don’t know. I’d keep still, Willie, that’s a dear. Auntie is tired.” After remaining quiet a moment, little Willie broke out: “Where do the stars come from, auntie ?” “I don’t know, nobody knows.” “Did the moon lay ’em?” “Yes, I guess so,” replied the wicked lady. « “Can the moon lay eggs, too ?” “I suppose so. Don’t bother me!” A short silence, w hen Willie broke out again: “Benny says oxins is a owl, auntie, is they?” O, perhaps so!” “I think a whale could lay eggs—don’t you, auntie ?” “O, yes—l guess so,” said the shameless woman. “Did vou ever see a whale on his nest?” “0,1 guess so!” “Where?” “I mean no. Willie, you must be quiet; I’m getting crazy!” “What makes you crazy, auntie?” “O,dear! you ask so many questions.” “Did you ever see a little fly eat sugar ?” “Yes, dear.” “Where?” “Willie, sit down on the seat and be still, or I’ll shake you. Now, not another word!” And the lady pointed her finger sharply at the little boy, as if she was going to stick it through him. If she had been a wicked woman she would have sworn. There are eight million little boys like Willie in the United States.— Brockton Gazette.

A man who imagines he has solved the problem of perpetual motion is always an object of commiseration to his friends; but with how much pity must the resident of Ware, Massachusetts, be regarded, who thinks lie has invented three perpeutal motion machines.