Democratic Sentinel, Volume 6, Number 31, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 1 September 1882 — Wasn’t Posted. [ARTICLE]

Wasn’t Posted.

A grave-looking man in a brown coat tapped one of the most energetic dancers on the arm and requested a few minutes’ private conversation. “ Well, sir,” said the heated waltzer, after he had excused himself from his partner and elbowed his way into the dressing-room. “ Speak quick. What can I do for you ?” “I see you wear Feeley’s old-style knob extension,” said the grave man, earnestly. “ Now, that was all very well five years ago, but science, my dear sir, is always on the march.” “ What the blazes are you talking about ?” asked the round dancer, much mystified. “ Another great objection is the extreme weight of the old style. They are really no better than the solid wood. Now, why not try one of our latest improved, with Dutlicker’s patent attachment ?” “Patent what?” “Why, patent leg,” said the agent, blandly fishing out an order book. “Ours only weigh four pounds, and have the new side-pivot action, French - kicking spring and all the latest wrinkles. Only $45 by ex—” “ What the blazes do I want with a false leg ?” roared the other, much disgusted; “ I have got two real ones of my own.” “ Why, you don’t mean to say that you haven’t got a false leg ?” said the agent, much bewildered. “ No, sir—you can see for yourself,” and he held up his calves to be pinched. “False leg, indeed I” “ Then what in the name of thunder did you mean by staggering round in there just now like a pair of tongs in a fit ? Are you knock-kneed, or what ?” “ Why, you old fool,” retorted the young man, with deep scorn, “don’t you know anything ?' I was dancing the racket,” and he rushed off, consulting his programme, while the unsophisticated leg-man went around trying to convince the floor managers that a dangerous lunatic had managed to work his way in there somehow.— Derrick Dodd.

The date of the first invention of sewing needles is unknown. Their use was known to the ancient Egyptians, needles having been found in their tombs. They were of bronze and three or four inches in length. Pliny mentions bronze needles as in use in his day. The steel needle was introduced into England in the time of Elizabeth; but the process by which it was made was kept secret and the art was unknown till the year 1650, when it was revived by one Greeningin Buckinghamshire. Hkiidio coaches are a failure in Philadelphia. Too slow, too small an 1.100 much fristkm is the verdict against them.