Democratic Sentinel, Volume 6, Number 26, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 28 July 1882 — IMPUDENCE SAT DOWN UPON. [ARTICLE]

IMPUDENCE SAT DOWN UPON.

Some timejsince one of the brightest and wittiest of Cincinnati’s girls went abroad, and when she returned home, about the first person to congratulate her on her safe return wasß., a young blood of the city, whose dollars exeeeded his sense in the ratio of about a million to one “Aw, Miss X.,” he said, “permit me to greet you. J know you have had a very pleasant trip abrqad.” “Yes,” she answered “very pleasant, indeed. I was all over the continent, and through E gland. Ireland and Scotland ” “Ah, In Ireland; and did you see the Blarney stone?” “Yes; I was there.” “Oh, I should so delight to see it. It has always been a desire of mine to kiss that celebrated stone, but I have never had tbp opportunity. ” ‘‘lndeed, then, you should.” “I know !butl have not doneso;but why shouldn’t I kiss it by proxy? You have been there and kissed it; why should I not take the influence of the Blarney stone from your lips?”— and the smart Aleck stepped forward to kiss the young lady. She drew back, and looking at him squarely ip ffie face, said: “I beg your pardon, my dear Mr. 8., but I sat upon the Blarney stone.” Like a man with a great sorrow, B. sank down in a heap, and he hasn’t said “Ireland” since, and the very word “Blarney" makes him delirious.

An Austin widow was contemplating the pc rpetration of matrimony for a second time when the rumor reached the ears of her little boy, who burst into the room where the widow was ehtortaining the young"pflan who bad been mentioned jn tfir.t oopuecr tion, and exclaimed: “If pa was alive he would cure you of wanting to get'married again.” The marvelous durability of mortar in Italy is attributed by the London Builder to the fact that tbp lime rp mains In a pit covered with water for two years before it is used, whereas in England lime is slaked and used the same day. Most building specifl ca ions even require newly slaked lime. Mayor Wilson, of New Bedford, gave somo homely advice to the graduating class of the high school, telling the boys that a trade was a deferrable accomplishment, and the girls that house work ought to bo included in their accomplishments. Borne of the boys and girls listened with manifest scorn. THE DISTINGUISHING CHARM. A delightful fragrance of freshly gathered flowers and spices is the|distinguishing charm of Floreston Cologne. 9