Democratic Sentinel, Volume 5, Number 30, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 2 September 1881 — Donlevy’s Door. [ARTICLE]

Donlevy’s Door.

“ I want a piece av a board sawed off, planed on the outside,” said Mr. Donlevy ; “ we’d a few friends in at the house last night to a christenin’, and the lower part av the dure got kicked out in the merriment. ” “How wide do you want the piece cut ?” asked the carpenter. “ The width av the dure, av course,” replied Mr. Donlevy. “ And how wide is the door ?” “ Well, it’s as wide as a chair is long, jist. Ye kin jist lay a chair across it to keep the childer in an’ the pigs out, an’ it fits as though it war matched fur it.” “But all chairs are not the same size,” said the carpenter. “Aw, thundher an’, turf ! yer thikerheaded nor a railroad spike ; tlie chair comes up jist even wid the edge of the windy-sill. ” “But how high is the window-sili?” asked Mr. Chips. “Bother the badgerin’ tongue o’ ye,” growled Mr. Donlevy; * ‘ it’s only the widness av me hand, barrin’ the thumb, higher than theTain-watlfer that sthands outside; an’ av ye can’t make it from that ye can lave the job, an’ I’ll take it to some carpinther that understliamls his business aud knows tlie measure av a dure in his head widout making a chatychism av himself. Say, can ye cut me a piece ass the size av that, ye leather-headed wood butcher, ye, or will I go find a man av yer craft that has half the sinse he wur born wid?” And he had to go find one.