Democratic Sentinel, Volume 5, Number 23, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 15 July 1881 — Something in the Bed. [ARTICLE]

Something in the Bed.

Judge Pitnam has a habit of slipping his watch under his pillow when he goes to bed. One night, somehow, it slipped down, and as the judge was restless, it worked its way down toward the foot of the bed. After a bit, while he was lying awake, his foot touched it; it felt very cold; he was surprised, scared, and jumping from the bed, he said: “By gracious, Maria, there’s a toad or something under the covers; I touched it with my foot.” ” Mrs. Pitnam gave a loud scream, and was on the floor in an instant. “Now, don’t go to hollering and waken up the neighbors,” said the Judge. “You get me a broom or something, and we’ll fix the thing mighty quick. ” Mrs. Pitnam got the broom and gave it to the Judge with the remark that she felt as if snakes, were creeping up and down her legs and back. “Oh, nonsense, Maria! Now turn down the covers slowly while I hold the bioom and bang it. Put a bucket of water alongside the bed so we can shove it in and drown it. ” Mrs. Pitnam fixed the bucket and gently removed the covers. The Judge held the .broom uplifted, and as the black ribbon of the silver watch was revealed, he cracked away at it three or four times with the broom, then he pushed the tiling off into the bucket. Then they took the light to investigate the matter. When the Judge saw what it was he said: “I might have known—it is just like you women to go. screeching ana fussing about nothing. It’s utterly ruined. ” “It was you that made the fuss, not me,” said Mrs. Pitman. “You needn’t try to put the blame on me,” then the Judge turned in and growled at Maria until he fell asleep.