Democratic Sentinel, Volume 5, Number 2, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 18 February 1881 — Something Missing. [ARTICLE]

Something Missing.

On a train going up the river was a young man in farmer’s dress, who had his overcoat pockets full of purchases. After inspecting two or three parcels he took the wraps off a 25-cent thermometer and examined the instrument with the closest interest. He looked at the face, then at the back, and the longer he looked the more puzzled he seemed. A gentleman who had been observing him finally remarked : “ Been buying a thermometer, I see ?” “Yes ; I bought her for a neighbor of ours.” “ What’s the temperature in this car just now ?” The young man took a long squint at the thermometer, turned it over two or three times, and then answered: “ It’s about middling, I guess.” Nothing further was said for ten minutes, and the gentleman was busy with his paper, when the other touched his arm and said : “ Say, are you used to thermometers?” “Yes; slightly.” “ Well, I’m a little green, and I’m willing to own up. Seems to me there’s something wrong about this ’ere.” “I guess not; it’s a cheap instrument, but it seems to be all right ” “Well, it maybe, but I had made up my mind there was something missing. I can’t find any keyhole, and if it ever had any hands on the face they’re gone now for sure !” It took about five minutes to enlighten him, and, when he realized “how she worked,” he put it in his pocket with the remark : “I’m going home and tell the old man that none of us know enough to tell when we git chilblains I”