Democratic Sentinel, Volume 4, Number 42, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 26 November 1880 — Wouldn’t Call Names, [ARTICLE]

Wouldn’t Call Names,

Bill Jones had been to sea, and, on his return, he was relating to his uncle an adventure which he met with on board a ship. “ I was one night leaning over the taffrail, looking down into the mighty ocean,” said William, “ when my watch fell from my pocket, and immediately sunk out of sight. The vessel was going ten knots an hour ; but, nothing daunted, I sprang over the rail, and, after a long search, found the watch, came up close under the stern, and climbed back to the deck without any one knowing I had been absent.” “William,” said his uncle, opening his eyes to their widest capacity, “how fast did you say the vessel was sailing ? ” “Ten knots an hour,” replied William. “ And you dived down into the sea, William, and came up with the watch, and climbed up the rudder chains ? ” “ Yes, uncle.” “And you expect me to believe your story?” “Of course,” replied William, “you wouldn’t dream

of calling me a liar ? ” “William,” said his uncle, gravely, “ you know I never call anybody names; but if the Mayor were to come to me and say, ‘ Josiah, I want to find the biggest liar in town,’ I would come straight to you and say, ‘ William, the Mayor wants to see you. ’ ”