Democratic Sentinel, Volume 4, Number 14, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 14 May 1880 — COLLOQUIALISM--NO. 3. [ARTICLE]

COLLOQUIALISM--NO. 3.

See proceedings ’of Democratic convention on third page. “And Satan came also,” is the phrase i logy in which the Republican introduces Bob. Ingersoll to the Methodist General Conference, at Cincinnati. Bob furnisaed a leading editorial for the Republican a few weeks since. The way the Republicans have managed the finances of the Government is shown by the investigation of the books; erasures and alterations, and $.140,000,000 in lump gone—no telling where—probably into a Republican election corruption fund. Secretary Evarts’ reqtest to the Committee on A[.propriatiocs to pro vide $50,000 for the entertainment of the King of Siam is reported by the St. Louis Republican to have called out this statesmanlike remark from one of the Committee: “It is just as I expected. Grant has been entertained over there, and lias invited everybccy to return his visit, expecting the Government to pay the expense.-, and this is the first in the.raft.” The Democratic Convention of last Saturday designated te morrow for conventions to appoint delegates to the County Convention which will as semble at this place Saturday of next week and put in nomination a Democratic County ticket. The time given ' is short—too short—but we trust this fact will prompt to greatly increased effort# to secure full attendance in the several township meetings, and deliberate, careful attention to the business entrusted to them.

The meeting of the Democratic Central Committee in the parlors o» the Nowels House, on last Saturday, was largely attended, not only by members of the committee, but by solid, substantial representative democrats from all parts of the county. Horace Strong, whose years number over the alloted three score and ten was called to the chair and presided with a vim that would have done cred it to many of half his years. All in all, the spirit manifested betokened that the Democracy of Jasper county mean I usincss year, and will go into the contest, with a determination it hasnever before felt to win. So be it.

Ringster—Well, Bitters, you took it into your head to respond to Mack yourself, this week? Bitters—Yes, and didn’t I Ringster—Hold on, old brsg. No you didn’t. In your first item.you attempt to furnish a reason for the very general impression that you do not furnish the brains for your paper. - The simple, plain reason is they know you lack in the brain department. They know, too, that ’Tro-quois,” our beloved consul, myself and others, do it for you. Bitters—H-h-h-how do you know» then, that I am the author of the a-a-attaeks upon Mack, this week? Ringster—Their brevity and extreme emptiness point very readily to the author. Then, again, the stupid falsehoods you utter with reference to the standing of Mack with members of his party. Everybody knows that the utmost harmony and good feeling exists between them, and they know, also, that your imaginary democratic leaders entertain for you feelings of pity and contempt, and laugh at you r discomfiture. You are the last man in whom they would confide. Bitters—W-w-why you instructed me to pursue that p-p p-policy. Ringster—Y'o i lie; I didn’t. I told you to work to create a feeling of distrust and dissatisfaction. Instead of that, fool-like, you parade the idea that it is an existing fact, and now they are all laughing at you. Bitters—Well, I can’t heip it. The older I get, the bigger fool I become. I wish I was as free from interference as Mack. He takes the liberty to map his own line of action, of course with a view to the success of his party and principles, but they don’t hamper him as you do me. If I could I’d sell out.

Ringster—Yes, but you want us to do by you as they did in Rochester—give you three prices for your office in order to get shut of you, but we can’t do that. Don’t be such an old ass. Try and do better. Follow out our orders more explicitly in the future, aad may be things may take a turn for the better. Bitters - I don’t know. I’m equally unfortunate in the otherdepartments. I got the deuce last week for intimating that the nomination of Grant might occasion the organization of a third party. This week I- try to explain, and now I am catching h—hot shot for that. Ringster—You infernal old fool! What else could you expect? Bitters —But I nave pledges from Blaine, in case of his election— Ringster—Let Blaine go to the devil- You are not fit for the most insignificant position. Most likely he’d put you off, as our Fraud did your predecessor, with an appointment to Turk Island. James indignantly refused it. You, however, are fool enough io accept anything. Bitters- But, I think Blaine’ll act fair. I have his picture on my office door. He’s a large man, good looking—looks something like me— Ringster—You conceited package of asafoetidft, onions and garlic! If he looks anything like you, then let us have Grant and a third party! Bitters - Well, I can’t help my make up any more than I can write a fair

news item. A few weeks ago I published a three or four line local, the only production of my own in the whole paper, and in the evening up come a respectable old lady to the office. She didn’t get sight of me, I was hid. But didn’t she go right across the hall and request Mack to inform that l}ing old fool of tire Republican tnar rotten eggs were as cheap here as in Rochester. Ringster—What did she mean by leaving such a request and warning? Bitters—Why, you see, I was egged once in Rochester. Ringster- So, then, change cf location has not improved your disposition nor qualification to conduct a paper? Bitters—No. Wish I bad never seen Rensselaer. \\ ish I was back in Rochester. Ringster—Well, Bitters, so do I» ami the Republican party. You have proved to be a"n a-u-c-i-a-t i-n-giiz-zle,” and through your blunders we wjH “loose”the county.