Democratic Sentinel, Volume 3, Number 41, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 21 November 1879 — Never. [ARTICLE]

Never.

Three old gentlemen are sitting around a table on a steamboat, waiting to get another party to a game of cards. Presently they espy a nice-looking young fellow. One of the party goes up to him and says: “ Pardon me, young man; we want somebody to join us in a game of cards; would be happy to have you with us.” “ Thanks; I never play cards.” “ Take a drink with us.” “ Thanks; I never drink.” “ Well, have a cigar.” “ Thanks; I never smoke.” “ Eh! Now X rather like that in a young man. Come into the cabin, and I’ll introduce you to my wife and daughters.” “Thanks,” said the demure young man; “ I shall never marry.”