Democratic Sentinel, Volume 3, Number 25, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 1 August 1879 — Philosophers at a Picnic. [ARTICLE]

Philosophers at a Picnic.

“Xenophon,” said his master one dav when he had dismissed the academy and taken the students out to a picnic—- “ Xenophon, 1 do not like to see the young men of Athens so much given to hugging the maidens of Greece on these occasions. Their actions are dangerous to public liberty and free institutions, and they are a check upon the free expression of popular sentiment.” “And whyfore is it?” asked the future man of the “Anabasis.” “Because,” replied Socrates, “it’s muslin they press.” “True,” said the astonished Xenophon, “but then it is done in the interest of lawn order.” Socrates wanted awfully to say, “of corset it,” but he happened to think that same remark was made six or seven times a year by every paragrapher who could strike a lead to it, so he simply said: . . “But it’s unrepublican, it isn’t democratic; it makes' our young men run after the prints.” “True,” said Alcibiades, who had just joined the group, “but you know, ‘None but the barege deserve the fair.’ ” “Yes,” replied Xenophon, “and they are unflagging in their devotions to the bunting.” “Pekays,” cynically remarked his teacher, “it’s the most expensive.” “Ye-es,” said the pupil, “and then it requires protection.” “It is, then,” Alcibiades said with an inquiring accent, “a monopoly?” “Womantic idear,” said Apollodorns, who had just come up, but nobody let on they heard him; and when he feebly added that “anyhow the custom was a waste of muscle and time,” he was ordered off the track.— Burdette.

Mr. Hugh Monro, in walking around Lake Jackson, some four or five miles from Tampa, Fla., found an aligator’s nest with eighty odd eggs. He bagged the whale lot, and is contemplating whether to go into the propagating business. >