Democratic Sentinel, Volume 2, Number 9, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 12 April 1878 — A Milkman’s Mad Mathematics. [ARTICLE]

A Milkman’s Mad Mathematics.

When Thomas drove up to the house on Elizabeth street yesterday to deliver the usual quart of mixture, the gentleman of the house kindly inquired: “Thomas, how many quarts of milk do you deliver ?” “ Ninety-one, sir.” “ And how many cows have you ?” “Nine, sir.” The gentleman made some remarks about the early spring, close of the Eastern war and the state of the roads, and then asked: “Say, Thomas, how much milk per day do your cows average?” “Seven quarts, sir.” “ Ah—um,” said the gentleman, as he moved off. Thomas looked after him, scratched his head, and at once grew pale as he pulled out a short pencil and began to figure on the wagon-cover. ‘ * Nine cows is nine, and I set seven quarts down under the cows and multiply. That’s sixty-three quarts of milk. I told him I sold ninety-one quarts per day. Sixty-three from ninety-one leaves twenty-eight, and none to carry. Now, where do I get the rest of the milk? I’ll be hanged if I haven’t given myself away to one of my best customers by leaving a durned big cavity in these figgers to be filled with water !”— Detroit Free Press. Motheks ! Mothers ! I Mothers!!! Don’t fail to procure Mrs. Winslow’s Soothing Syrup for all diseases incident to the period of teething in children. It relieves the child from pain, cures wind colic, regulates the bowels, ana, by giving relief and health to the child, gives rest to the mother. It is an old and well-tried remedy.