Democratic Sentinel, Volume 1, Number 48, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 11 January 1878 — A Modern Munchausen. [ARTICLE]

A Modern Munchausen.

One of the Boston restaurants boasts of an Irißli Munchausen, who acts in the humble capacity of waiter, and adds much to the entertainment of guests. One of them, being served with a small lobster, asked: “ Do you call that a lobster, Mike ?” “Faix, I believe they do be callin’ thim lobsters here, surr. We call ’em crabs at home;” “Oh,” said the diner, “you have lobsters iu Ireland ?” “Is it lobsters? Begorra the creeks is full of ’em. Many a time have I seen ’em whin I’ve lepped over the sthrames. ” “How large do the lobsters grow in Ireland ?” “ Well,” said Mike, thoughtfully, “to shpake widin’ bounds, surr, I’d say a matter of five or six feet.” “ What 1 firo or oLx feet; how do they get arouhd in those creeks ?” “Bedad, surr, the creeks in Ireland are fifty or sixty feet wide,” said the unabashed Mike. “But,” said the persistent inquirer, ‘ ‘ you said you had seen them when you were leaping over the streams, and lobsters here live in the sea.” “’Deed I did, surr; we’re powerful leapers in Ireland. As for the say, surr, I’ve seen it red wid ’em. ” “But look here, my fine fellow,” said the guest, thinking he had cornered the Hibernian at last, “lobsters are not red until they are boiled.” “Don’t I know that?” said Mike, reproachfully; “bnt there are bilin’springs in the ould countliry, an’ they shwim troo ’em an’ come out ready for ye to crack open and ate;” and Mike walked calmly off to wait upon the next guest, leaving his interlocutor to digest the lobster and the story. Indian Representation in Congress. It is gratifying to know that the Indian Territory is far enough along in civilization to deserve a delegate in Congress. A concession of this character will do something to correct the general impression in this country and in Europe that we have done nothing for the Indians but to hunt ‘them, and will aid, perhaps, in bringing more wild tribes into the Territory. The consideration which leads to the step, however, is the fact that the Territory is now put to an annual expense of $60,000 to send tribal deputations to Washington. The Territory has 60,000 inhabitants, in five tribes, including 10,000 whites, who have intermarried, and is increasing quite rapidly in wealth, raising large crops and great herds of cattle. The full status of a Territory does not seem to be too onerous a Government to impose upon them. We trust the Secretary of the Interior will urge the qualification of suffrage by the educational test, as the majority of the inhabitants already speak and read the English language. We hope it will be a good while before the Indian or any other Territory is made a State. We have made too many States out of a few ranches and a small purchasable voting population. Springfield Republican.