Democratic Press, Volume 1, Number 38, Decatur, Adams County, 4 July 1895 — Page 7

All Out of Sorts I Tired, weak and weary. If this vour •on.itiun, stol> aud th nk You an? a su[ _ " * ,rr from dyspepsia, and gr.-at misery *«aiu jou if you d 0 dwek it Ilow< Mood s Sana] arilla is the best medkina you can take. It has peculiar power to tone and strengthen the stomach. Hood’s Sarsaparilla Is the only true blood purifier prominently to the public eye to-day. $1; six for $5. Hpod's PiIIS Summer Tourist Rates. Idle Northwestern Line (Chicago and ■gonnwebteru Railway) is now sellinuexen: ; -:i tickets at reduced rates to St. Paul, Miiinvapohs Duluth, Ashland. Bayfield, Marquette, Deadwood, Dakota. * Hot Springs. Denver, < dorado Springs, Maniton. Sa t Lake City, and the lake and .■-towurtain resorts of the West and NortliS'>2 /or rates and full information apply to Agents of connecting lines. Illustrated pamphlets, giving full particulars, J „ ni.i led free upon application to W. B. Kn. d em. <l. I>. A T. A.. Chicago and - Northwestern Railway, Chicago, 111. Prussia was at first Borussia, th •country of the Bor issi. IHB Nickel Plate road has published a juap of Boston, Mass., showing the locaDun of the ( hristian Endeavor Convention Ball and state Headquarters of the 14th International Convention, July ‘ t? an, i presenting the merits of tin ir through Drawing Room Sleeping Car line between Chicago and Boston, w rite ior a copy to anv agent ot the Nickel Plate road, or B. F. Borner, General Passenger Agent. A Little too Risky. Great Editor—‘-Here is SIO,OOO. Go to Madame Highart. the famous actress, now at the ;St. < .abriel Hotel, shake the money in her face, and tell her—before witnesses, remember that wo will give ter that if she will write us a short story.” Trusted Employee—■*! thinkshe will accept.” Editor ‘Mee Whittaker! Then don't | ?o.” —New York Weekly, What Man Expects of a Wife. I A man expects his wife to be better than he, writes Mrs. Burton Kingsland | in the July Ladies'Home Journal. No matter how little religion a man may I have himself his ideal wife is al wavs a woman with the purity of soul that , only a Christian can have: and to a , good man it is usually ] art of bis regs ligion to believe that his wife is morally I higher and nobler than himself.

six mocK. WEARY WOMEN WATCH FOR THAT BLESSED HOI R. Help for our Working-Girls and Women Near at Hand. [SPECIAL TO OCB LADT BEADKBS ] the stroke of six ends the day’s work at stores, offices, ■" I factories, mills, where women Q are employed. But their neces“T work •» home, sewing, e/x . '©U mending, etc., VBStoTttsHfiES must after that time, and ‘'theirwork \s,i"£sfr is never done." All women work; 1, 'bijK some for ambition, ■ some for econf M'-.-r’vl om y * n fl l ® jW household, but -f» 'At?*'® the great mass of women work 'TV' VtA f° r ,keir I f &*• '■> subject to the w. ' same physical 1 ' aws 1 a " suffc: ft' M, ..ito"! alike from the f. 'if’if rl same physical IL --'ly g M disturbances, and the nature of their duties often quickly drifts them into the horrors of all kinds ot female complaints, ovarian troubles, inflammation. ulceration, falling and displacement of the womb, leueorrlnea, and perhaps irregular or suppressed “monthly periods,” causing severe backache, loss of appetite, nervousness, irri- < lability ami weakness. Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound is the unfailIng cure for all these troubles. T It strengthens the proper mus- JBT cb <, and cures displacement. jCmH**, Backache, dizziness, faintIng, bearing-down, disordered stomach, moodiness, dislike of friends and society — all symptoms of the one cause — will be quickly dispelled. Write Mrs. Pinkham about HbrJYI.T your trouble. -1 You can tell the story of fv®,F'." a 'w your pam to a woman, and ■ W’J''' get the help that only woman ” can give. Mrs. Pinkham's address is Lynn, Mass. The Greatest Medical Discovery of the Age. KENNEDY’S MEDICAL DISCOVERY. DONALD KENNEDY, OF ROXBURY, MASS., Has discovered in one of our common pasture weeds a remedy that cures every kind of Humor, from the worst Scrofula down to a common Pimple. He has tried it in over eleven hundred cases, and never failed except in two cases (both thunder humor). He has now in his possession over two hundred certificates of its value, all within twenty miles of Boston. Send postal card for book. A benefit is always experienced from the first bottle, and a'perfect cure is warranted when the right quantity is taken. When the lungs a*e affected it causes shooting pains, like needles passing through them; the same with the Liver or Bow els. This is caused by the ducts being stopped, and always disappears in a week after taking it. Read rhe label. If the stomach is foul or bilious it will cause squeamish feelings at first. No change of diet ever necessary. Eat the best you can get. and enough of it. Dose, one tablespoonful jn water at bedtime. Sold by all Druggists.

THE JOKERS’ BUDGET. JESTS AND YARNS BY FUNNY MEN OF THE PRESS. No Contest--Just the Thing--The One Thing Lacking--A Splendid Man.-Etc., Etc. NO CONTEST. Teddie—What are woman’s rights, pa? Pa—Everything they want, my boy; always remember that. JUST THE THING. Morton—What do you intend doing with that mouse? . Baldwin—Use him for bait. Morton (astonished) —Fur bait? Baldwin—Yes. I am going to try to catch some catfish. THE ONE THING LACKING. “I hear, Miss Itnpecune, that you ’ have the bicycle craze.” "Yes. That is, I have the craze, but I’m sorry to say that I haven’t the bicycle.” A SPLENDID MAN. Husband—Do you think that doctor you have is doing you any good? M ife—lndeed lie is. He lias just told me that nothing but a trip to Europe would save me. HOW IT STRIKES EACH. Wife—That’s a perfect dream of a bonnet. Husband—Yes; but I’ll bet it cost a regular nightmare of a price. LITTLE THINGS THAT WORRY. "What is the matter, old fell iw; you look worried?’’ "Well, lam. I’m being dunned up hill and down dale by my creditors.” "Ch, you owe a large sum of money?” “No; but a great number of small sums—and debts are like children, the smaller they are the more bother they are.” ONLY FAIR. "This is passing.strange” said the passenger as the conductor handed back to him the lead nickel. “Not so much as it is passing queer,” returned the conductor, as he forgot to ring up the next fare. THE NEW WOMAN. * “Caroline I” In the darkness of night he clutched the coverlet wildly. "Caroline,” he gasped, "I’m sure there's a woman in the house 1” But his wife only laughed at his terror, and with a little moan he covered up his head. TROUBLE EXPECTED. First Doctor—What do you have to stay in your office to-night for? Second Doctor—Expect a call to attend Hadley’s family. First Doctor—Why, they're not sick. Second Doctor —No, but I just saw Hadley take home a chafing dish, together with a book on "How to Prepare Your Own Food.” A WESTERN VERDICT. Coroner (of Woollytown)—Wh at is your verdict, gentlemen of the jury, as to the deceased’s death? Jury—Thet he committed suicide by not drawiii’ his gun in time . NOT A FAIR TEST. Charlie came crying from school. "What’s the matter, now?” asked his father. "Teacher said I didn’t pass my examination,” wailed Charlie, "and I’d just like to know how she could tell—she only asked me the things that I didn’t know.” SPOILING THE JOB. Jaggles—The man was lying in the street where he had tried to kill himself. I began to question him and it seemed to make h m angry. Waggles—No wonder When a man has gone to the trouble to poison himself he doesn’t like to be pumped. AN EXCUSABLE TIP. Bilkins—Seems to me the custom of tipping is spreading everywhere. It's outrageous! ’’ Wilkins—ln some cases it is excusable. "I’d like to know in what cases?” "Well, you can’t get weighed without tipping the beam, you know.” ONLY DODGE THEM. Doctor —The bicycle gives people the best exercise in the world. Patient —But I can’t afford to .‘ide a bicycle. Doctor —Oh, you don’t need to ride one. DAY DREAMS. Farmer —Look how many blossoms are on those trees. If every blossom would bring forth an apple I would be rich next fall. Dr. Bolus—And if every apple were eaten when green, and every eater got a colic, my fortune would be made right off. A SAD CASE. De Chappie—lf there’s any one nuisance I hate more than another, it’s a fellow who is always going around introducing people. There's Goodheart, for instance. Bouttown —What’s he been doing? De Chappie—The fool! the other day he introduced me to a man I owe money to, and I’d been owing it so long he’d forgotten all about me. Now I’ll have to pay or be sued. Short Way With Intruders. Hans von Bulow was taking infinite pains in drilling his orchestra (or an early performance of Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony, and the musical epicures ot Meiningen were reveling . in the anticipation of a huge treat

A high personage at court, more impatient than the rest, expressed an ardent wish to attend one of the rehearsals. The conductor was greatly annoyed, but could not decline the honor. However, lie planned a little scheme for speedily getting rid of his unwelcome audience. When tlie exalted lady and her attendants had taken their seats and the rehearsal was about to begin, Bulow called upon the bassoonist to play his part alone from beginning to end. The man obeyed, and began to draw from his weird instrument a series of incoherent grunts and groans which were painful to listen to when unaccompanied by the other parts. It was the most horrible solo that had ever been heard. Bulow occasionally interrupted the performance, demanding a repetition of certain particularly discordant passages with suggested modifications, and when the bassoonist had finished lie ordered liiin to play the whole of his part over again. This was too much for the great lady She hastily rose and confessed to the conductor that the affair had been ratner different from what she had been lead to expect, adding that "it was very interesting, no doubt, but somewhat fatiguing, ’’whereupon she took her departure. Bulow s face beamed with satisfaction, and he gave the signal for tlie rehearsal proper to commence. Bees Swarmed on the Coffin. A strange incident happened at a funeral near Parsons, Kan., the other day. A little son of Samuel Carson, residing southwest of the city, died and was buried in the neighborhood cemetery There being no hearse, the remains were placed in a spring wagon and conveyed to the cemetery. On the way to ths cemetery a swarm of bees gathered on the lid of the coffin and there remained. When the cemetery was reached all efforts to drive the bees from the coffin were without avail, and the pallbearers were forced to take charge of the coffin with tlie bees swarming about them, and before the remains were deposited in the grave every pallbearer suffered, being stung in more than one place on the face and hands. The bees clung so tenaciously to the coffin that many of them were buried with the body of the dead boy. The dead boy was very fond of bees, and whether the bees were thus i showing their grief over the loss of I their young friend, or what the signfi- ; eance of such an act on the part of the bees was, is a mystery yet unsolved. Careless Drivers. When an omnibus or a cab driver runs over a passenger in London streets the possible loss of a license ! exercises a wholesome restraint. The I private coachman and the driver of i the tradesman’s cart has far less ' compunction in teaching an old gentleman to get out of their way by running him down. At the worst i they are fined ; not infrequently their tines are paid by a sympathizing emi ployer. But no one pays a poor cabman’s fines, and ihe loss ot a license i in addition means the loss of his i means of livelihood. In Paris, we believe, the driver of a fiacre is generally' allowed by the law to run over one bourgeois in ; the course of a year. In London magistrates are less lenient. Moreover, the law makes an unfair and i arbitrary distinction between tlie cabman’s case and that of the unlicensed driver. The former is lia- | ble to be removed from the box for good and all; the driver of the cart may continue to go on in his wild I career, though he destroys several citizens in the course of the year. Leaps of a Mountain Sheep. No; the mountain sheep does not i leap from great heights, and land either upon his horns or his feet. He knows the strength of his mai terials too well to try it. His horns and skull might successfully with- ! stand the shock, but the weight of ; his body would break his spinal ! column in two or three places, to say | the least of it. It is true that when ! hard pressed a herd will sometimes i plunge down a terribly steep incline, i sliding and bounding from point to I point, until they plow into the i "slide-rock” below: but as to leaping ' over a sheer precipice, I never saw ’ any one wlip even claimed to have ; ever witnessed such a thing. The old rams often fight by butting each i other terifically, and often splinter, lor sometimes break off, the ends iof their horns in that way.—St. | Nicholas. Palace Plated With Gold. The Czar has a palace just outside St. Petersburg, known as Czarskoe- • Selo, which was built by Catherine the Great. Itisot vast extent and | plated over with gold. It took nearI ly $1,000,000 worth of bullion to do the work, and when, owing to the dampness of the climate, it began to peel off, Catherine ordered it to be painted instead. Some Russian speculators wanted to scrape off the old gold and melt it over again, and they offered Catherine s.’>oo,ooo for the job. She sent them to prison for insulting her with the proposition, and covered the palace with yellow paint. An Anti-Fly Flower. German housewives say that the old-fashioned rose geranium will keep Hies away. A moderate-sized geranium will prove so disagreeable to flies that they will avoid its neighborhood. and two or three in a room will banish them altogether.

Highest of all ia Leavening Power.—Latest U. S. Gov’t Resort Royals? ABSOLUTELY PURE

A Queer Proposition. How could two persons be bom at the same time and die at the same time, at the end of fifty years, and yet one of them live one hundred days more than the other? The answer turns upon the familiar fact that a jierson who goes round the world towards the west loses a day, whilst the person who travels in the opposite direction gains a day. \Ve will suppose, then, that tlie two men in question were bom at the same instant in New York, from whence a trip round the world may easily be made once a year. One of them goes always towards the west, the other towards the east. One loses a day every year, the other gains a day every year. When the men die, at fifty years of age, one has seen one hundred days more than the other. Not Always a Good Plan. Daughter You told me that when I wanted a favor of my busband I should ask him after dinner. The first time I tried it he nut only refused, but he was just as cross and ugly as could be. He never refused me anything before - boo. l 00, hoo! Mother—Bless me. my dear, you shouldn’t have asked him after a dinner that you had cooked yourself.” Don’t Get Scared If you should hear that iu some place to which you are going malaria is prevalent. To the air poison which produces chills and fever, bilious remittent and dumb ague there Is a safe and thorough antidote and preventive, viz., Hostetter's Stomach Bitters. The great antl-maiarial specific is also a remedy for biliousness, constipation, dyspepsia, rheumatic and kidney trouble, nervousness and debility. The Cheerful Idiot. “It is a rathor severe refle tion on the vanity o’ man." said the philosophical boarder, “the fa t that his skeleton will fetch no more than $25 in market.” ‘T had the idea,” said the Cheerful Idiot, "that it would amount to a little over two hundred cold bones.” Nicotiuized Nerve*. Men old at thirty. Chew and smoke, eat little, drink, «r want to, all the time. Nerves tingle, never satlsSed, nothing s beautiful, happiness gone, a tobaeco saturated system telij the story. There's an easy way out. No-Te-Bac will kill the nerve-craving effects for tobaeeo and make you strong, vigorous aud manly, gold and guaranteed to cure by Druggists everywhere. Book. -Don't Tobacco Fplt or ta-oke Your Life Away." free. Ad. Sterling Remedy Co., New York City or Chicago. Opium Fiends. Twenty per cent, of the inmates of the state prison at Charlestown, Mass., are habitual opium-eaters, a ,d Warden Bridges says that it is next to impossible to prevent the smuggling of this drug into the ; rison. For Whooping Cough, Piso’s Cure is a successful remedy.-M. P. Dieter, 67 Throop Ave., Brooklyn, N. Y. Nov. 14, ’94. Canada is an Indian word meaning "collection of h .is.” Dr. PIERCE’S Golden Medical DISCOVERY Cures Ninety-eight per cent, of all cases of Consumption, in all its Earlier Stages. Although by many believed to be incurable, there is the evidence of hundreds of living witnesses to the fact that, in all its earlier stages, consumption is a curable disease. Not every case, but a large per tentage of cases, and we believe, fully gS Per cent, are cured by Di. Pierce’s Golden Medical Discovery, even after the disease has progressed so far as to induce repeated bleedings from the lungs, severe lingering cough with copious expectoration (including tubercular matter), gi CUI iCiSS vs flc-ll and eulreme emaciation and weakness.

'C ./X Out of sorts ) — an d no wonder. Think of the conI y dition of those poor women who have V*." f to wash clothes and clean house in the old-fashioned way. They’re tired, vexed, discouraged, out /aI 7/ \ I/ of sorts, with aching backs Z'h 'V-wL // z \ and aching hearts. N fill If They must be out of C \ \ their wits. Why don’t Nu \ "—f / / they use Pearline ? That 4 S is what every woman who S' values her health and strength 'umfl I \ v*' is coming to. And they’re coming to it now, faster than ever. Every day, Pearline's fame grows and its patrons increase in number. Hundreds of millions of packages have been used by bright women who want to make washing easy. it Was Before the Day of SAPOLIO They Used to Say “Woman’s Work Is Never Done.”

The heart ordinarily beats about seventy times a minute, ana throws about two ounces of blood at each contraction. When Traveling. Whether on pleasure bent, or business, take on every trip a bottle of Syrup of Figs, as it acts most pleasantly and effectually on the kidneys, liver, and bowels, preventing fevers, headaches and other forms of sickness. For sale in 50c. and $1 laittles by all leading druggists. Manufactured by the California Fig Syrup Co. only. The chemical composition of the epidermis of the heel is nearly the same as that of the matter of nails, horns and ho fs. Madam Boisvert. lam a mid-wife and have been giving McF.lree’s Wine of Cardui and Black-Draught tea to my lady patients both during pregnancy and alter birth as a tonic, and have found the treatment will do moro than is claimed for it. Two years ago I was so troubled with female weakness myself, that I could not work at all. I heard McElrec’s Wine of Cardui recommended, and gotsixb ‘tlesof it, and a mammoth package of Thedford’s Black-Draught. I began the treatment as directed, and in two weeks I had improved so much I could do my work, and have never been tr. übled with it since. Mrs. V. M. Boisvert, Zurich, Kansas. Mrs. Mary F. McClarin, Rockmart, Ga,, writes: “I have always been a great sufferer during child birth. I used Mcl.lree's Wine of Cardui before confinement the last time, and the pains were much less and shorter than ever before, and tny baby is larger and much healthier than any of the others. Henry IV. of France had the “cat ague,” or trembled whenever a cat was in sight. Hall's Catarrh Cure Is a constitutional cure. PTiee 75 cents. Corsica has a Phenician name, meaning "wooded islands." Ripan Tabules. Slip a vial into your vest pocket and your life is insured against the tortures of Dyspepsia and all kindred ailments. One gives relief. Chile isaPeruviantword, signifying ‘the land of snow.” NATIONAL EDUCATIONAL ASSOCIATION MEETING. Denver, Colo., .July 5 to 13, 1895. For this occasion the Wabash Railroad has made a rate of one fare for the round trip to Denver plus $2.00, added for membership fee. For full particulars in regard to this meeting, time of trains, rates, route, etc., call upon or write to any representative of the Wabash R. R.,or connecting lines, or C. S. CRANE, Gen’l Pass. & Tkt. Agt., Wabash R. R., St. Louis, Mo. Low Rates to Colorado. On account of the meeting of the National Educational Association at Denver, Col., July 5 to 12. 1895, the Northwestern Line will sell excursion tickets to Denver. Pueblo, Colorado Springs and Manitou at a rate not to exceed one fare for the round trip (with $2.00 added for membership fee.) The time limit of these tickets will be extremely liberal, and an excellent opportunity will be afforded for a summer sojourn in the “Rockies,” or enjoyable side trips to the Black Hills. Yellowstone National Park or the Pacific Coast. For full information apply to ageuts of connecting lines, or address W. B. Kniskern, General Passenger and Ticket Agent. Chicago and Northwestern R’y, Chicago, 111. Half-cured eruptions always recur. Eradicate them with Glenn's Sulphur Soap. "Hill’s Hair and Whisker Dye,” Black or Brown, 50c. Enclose a stamp to any agent of the Nickel Plate road for an elaborately illustrated art souvenir entitled “Summer Outings.” Wln«lnw*o Soothing Syrth* for (’liildron toething: sotteus the ctuns. reauces inflammation, nllays pain, cures wind colic. 25 cents a bottle.

BEST 1A THE WORLD. I \ ani Wfl \s Vtu\\) ©THE RISING SCN STOVE POLISH ia cakes for general blacking of a stove. THE SUN PAST® POLISH for a ouick after dinner shine, apniied and polished with a cloth. Moru Bros., Props., Canton, Mass., U.S.A. An injury to the tongue is said to be repaired by nature with greater rapidity than is the case with any other part of the system. The Nickel Plate road has compiled a list of country homes along the south shore cf Lake Erie, willing to accommodate summer boarders, and a copy will lie mailed to any address by enclosing a stamp to any agent of the Nickel Plate road or to B. F. Horner, General Passenger Agent. Costo Rica is a Spanish expression signifying "rich coa.-t." » REMEMBER it. I (r ! ROCKING® /Friends w^ necessary ® < Girl M cerILI ...» < J Dll!. 'J FOOD • YOU TM.toCj priends'Oats / FOR OLD AND YOUNG. 1 ALL GROCERS SELL 3 s FRIENDS’ j Beecham’s pills are for biliousness, sick headache, dizziness, dyspepsia, bad taste in the mouth, heartburn, torpid liver, foul breath, sallow skin, coated tongue, pimples loss of appetite, etc., when caused by constipation; and constipation is the most frequent cause of all of them. One of the most important things foj everybody to learn is that constipation causes more than half the sickness in the world,especially of women; and it can all be prevented. Go by the book,free at yous druggist’s,or write B.F. Allen Co. ,365Cane’ St., New York. Pills,los and 254 a box. Annval sales more than 6,000,000 boxes. * ASK YOUR DRUCKHST FOR * ★ The BEST ★ /Nursing Mothers, I n fants Z CHILDREN * JOHN CARLE & SONS, New York. * ■" . ,1 THE BABY'S LIFE depends on the food It gets. Insufficient nourishment is tho cause of DtiH-h of the fatality among infants. Improper tood brings on indigestion. If the food is right tin digestion will be good . jhl KidgeS Food is tin- best, there is nothing "j ist as good’’ or • nearly as good.” It is th.- b.-st in the whole world Have you a baby? Its 'ife depends upon how it is fed. Sold by Druggists. 35c up to $1.76. WOOLRICH & CO.. PALMER, M ASS. WE SELL PRINTING OFFICE OUTFITS at reasonable rates and upon liberal Terms. Writb for Particulars. FORT AA AA\E NKAAsi’A* PZK UNION, Fort Wayne, Ind. H OMESjEtHESOUTH. Geod farms: tine climate; low prices: easy terms. AddressD. H. ROGAN, Colonization Agent Q. * C. R. R., BIRMINGHAM. ALA. ni'rriSVO Thomas P. Simpson, Washington. t MsLft Io D- No atr " fe ® Until Patent ob. ■ " ’ ■ w tained. Write fur iurentor t Guide. TF ftrUPOQ f iring positions for the com.ng I LnunLnu year can h-ar .»f same. Amer ham I J tai hers’ Bureau, li. 67.241-3 state st.. Chicago. r. w. N. U. • - - - No. «7-9« AV hen Writing to Advertisers, say you •aw the Advertisement in tins paper. dEßSßßinuxarih CtJKES WHtRE ALL FLbE Hl’ Best Cough S v rup. Tastes Good. Use in time. Sold by druggists.