Decatur Democrat, Volume 38, Number 22, Decatur, Adams County, 17 August 1894 — Page 6

STARTING horses. SrtNIE OF THE REASONS WHY THIS IS A DIFFICULT BUSINESS. Why It I* Harder Here Than In Other CouutrlcH— Bother of Short Dashes—Popular Misunderstandings of Good and Bad Starts. Starting race horses is a fine ::rt, and the man who fancies it isn’t will never be convinced until he stands, flag in hand, facing 10,000 persons, and with a dozen or so thoroughbreds, ridden by. anxious jockeys, upon the track, each rider doing his best to get an advantage over his fellows. In 19 cases out of 20 it is not the thoroughbred that is to blame for the trouble at the post, nor is it the jockey directly, but it is the owner, trainer or some speculator in the background who has told the jockey to get off in front, no matter what happens, and who has promised to pay his line or reimburse him for any penalty he may incur in carrying out instructions. It is all very well to sit in the grand stand and criticise the work of the starter. One must try the business himself to appreciate its difficulties and its trials. It is a much harder task to start race horses as wo race in this country than in England, France, Austria or Australia, where the pace is very slow at the start, and a length or two advantage ■when the flag falls does not count for much. With us, and especially of late years, since the system of short dashes has become so popular with horse owners, which, by the way, has had such a depressing influence on the improvement of the blooded horse, the style has been to ride pellmell from the start, and races are won and lost very frequently when the flag falls. Judgment of pace is fast becoming a lost art, and even our best jockeys now, with very rare exceptions, have no more idea of race riding than to get away well and take the shortest course home in the quickest possible fashion. Consequently every boy becomes imbugfl with the idea that to win he must get off in front The reader can easily picture to himself the scenO at the post when there are 15 or 20 horses, many of them ridden by boys not 16 years of age, all of whom have been told—some of them with threats and others with promises of large rewards —to get the best of the start. Any visitor to our race tracks is familiar with the scene at the post. Half a dozen horses will rush away at a false break when there is no possible chance for an equitable start, and when they come trotting back and before they have had time to wheel and get into line those that remained beirisd the first time will dash out and run perhaps a hundred yards, leaving the first squad in their places. This goes on indefinitely- . The public is also familiar with the sight of one or more horses Standing motionless some lengths behind, their competitors. The starter, asks the riders of the horses in advance of the laggards | to wait until they have taken their positions. Each boy seems to think it is his bonnden duty to walk his horse when tb.ose in the rear attempt to move up at a walk and to break away madly if an attempt is made by those behind to come up at a run. A starter should have a thorough knowledge of racing, should be a man of a high degree of intelligence, be quick of eye and hand and, above all, be of unimpeachable integrity. The issue of many thousands of dollars, often-, times hundreds of thousands of dollars, is decided by-the fall of his red flag, and it is his duty to see that every horse, no matter by whom he is owned, has an equal chance when be.leaves the. post. Every effort is made to catch thb horsey in motion and on as nearly even possible. The eye must take in the field in a twinkling, and if thejudgment is that the start .is satisfactory the hand will act in unison with the eye and thejbrain. Very often horses are in bad places, and what might look to be a good start from grand stand would be a poor one in the judgment of the an I the flag does not fall. Criticism follows,T and generally it is-of the harshest and most unjust character. Some horses are quicker on their f t than others and will make a good start look like a pornone through their ability to get under way much more rapidly than their competitors. A good start When the flag drops becomes to the unthinking and ignorant a poor start, and abuse is heaped upon t he head of the official. . ..... From time to t'inje mechanical appliances for starting race horses have been invented, but they have not been practical and have not achieved success. A Slanging gate to be raised by electricity was spoken of some time ago, but fractious thoroughbreds could not be got near if. There are, again, horses that are - not to be controlled.at times,, and collisions’with the obstacle would undoubtedly be, ,of daily occurrence. Then, too, it would take months of drilling to get horses to overypme the idea that they were not going to run into the gate. This and many other objections can be raised against this system. A western inventor has patented a gate to be lowered before the horses while they stand at the post, which may be moved away from them at a rapid rate of speed by electric power, the barrier moving onward and upward at the same time. —New York Sun. Had to Be. Aunt Surplice—How peacefully still and solemn it always is on guuduy. Little Nephew—Yes’m; that’s because so many children’s papas is at home.—Good News. An English curio collector has an old time watch which is shaped like a cow’s horn. At the end of every hour it discharges a tiny pistol. Happy the man who early learns the wide chasm that lies between his wishes and his powers.—Goethe.

J® KES AND JOKERS. SOME OF THE FUN AND FUNMAKERS OF BYGONE DAYS. Fiona Dloffoneii to More Modern .Men—The 1 npllsli Furnluh Rather a Heavy Ct.a** of llnudr—lnexhaustible Supply of Irish Balia. There is more real humor in a modern clodhopper than in an ancient philosopher. The jokes that have come down to us from Greece are mostly poor stuff, but college boys are glad to got tuy comfort at all from root grubbing, and therefore they laugh at Diogenes and Aristophanes. It is said that the old cynic begged a tub to live in and toted this about where ho liked and squatted under it when ho pleaseu. When Alexander called on him in this palatial residence, he asked what he could do for him. “Get out of my sunlight, ” said Diogenes. That was tolerably good, but uncivil. The nasty oid cub with his tub could bo duplicated by a thousand tramps in America any day, and many of them are doubtless nastier and smarter. Plato is said to have preached fatality. When a rogue ran against him with a beam and excused himself as ’’fated to do it,” “Yes,” said Plato, ”1 see, but I also am fated to beat you for it, ” and gave the fellow a good canir For sportiveness Horace ! was the mo°t pleasing of the ancients, j but his verses are very amatory and some of them more suggestive than a ! French play. Chai les Lamb is worth 20 of him, only that Horace could be a ! poet when ha chose of a different sort : Homer's picture of Thersites is the oldest burlesque that I remember A joke coming down from 1000 B. C. ought to j be pretty good. Will M. Quad last as i long? English joking is generally heavy. Here is one told by James Payn. A witness in a slander case swore that Miss Iles was thrown over the wall a dozen I times. “Wirt, ” said the judge. “Who was Miss Iles, and why did they throw herover?” It was missiles. I cannot see anything so very funny in Sydney Smith’s wishing he could, on a certain hbt day, take off his flesh and sit in hit bones. But Hood and Charley Lamb are a brace that no one ought ever to be without. I have given up trying to keep a complete set of either. They are borrowed and relished, and, I suppose, read to pieces. Hood was capital in every direction he turned, whether pathos, satire, pun or pure joking. His taking off of celebrated characters was as good as anything. You should first, rtead BosweP’s “Johnson” and then read Hood’s ) ‘ * Johnsoniaha. ’ ’ But does anybody read Boswell nowadays? Alas, for once famous book! .Hood, says Johnson, was once consulted by a lady as to the degree of turpitude and spanking due h<j boy for robbing an orchard.- “Madam,” . said the ponderous doctor, “it all hangs i on the weight of the boy. I remember my school follow, Davy Garrick, who was a little fellow, robbing a dozen orchards with impunity, but the very first time I climbed an apple tree, for I was always solid, the bough broke, and it was ailed a judgment on me.- I suppose tlwit is why justice is represented with a pair of scales. ” Sheridan was the best of jokers, but half that is attributed to him is floating wit that needed a fatir r. It true that ho asked pis roistering but highborn crew one night whether they sho’ .ld drink like, beasts or e like men. Son: ? one said, “Men, of course. ” “Oh, then.” cried Sheridan, “we’ll get awful drunk, for beasts only drink what they need. ”’ Irish wit:is famous the. wpr’d over. Part of it consists, in the btfpie, but it is t re that an Irishman has not surpri. -s of speech, in which, consists the wit of the highest order. Le Fann, in his “Seventy Years of Irish Life, ” has cdl' cted a great deal that is delicious. A witness that was badgered by a lawyer was asked, “ You.’ro a ,nice fellow, now, ain’t j'on?” Witness answered, “1 ni, sir, and if I were not- on oath, sir, I’d say the same of you, ” Another witness was asked by a bullying counsel, “So you bad a pistol?” “I had, sir.' fWho did you intend to shoot?” “I wau’t intendin to shoot no one. ” “S--. you got it for nothing?” “No, I didn't. ’’ “Come, come! On your oath, what did.you get that pistol so-r?” “For thr- - and nineponce, 'sir, in MT. Richard: oil’s shop. ” Tbo Irish bull is often better than any deliberate wit. Sir Richard Steele incited these bulls were owing to the air of the country, “and, sir, ” he added, "if an Englishman was borii.her_e,. 1 don’t doubt he’d do the same. ” : In a debate'on taxation an Irish member of parliament insisted that “a tax on leather would press .heavily on. the barefooted peasantry: ” Sir Boyle Roche replied they could “make the.under leathers of wood. ” The same Sir Boyle urged the union of England and Ireland, so that “th- barren hills would become fertile vail ys. ” In another debate he answered, “I boldly answer in the affirmative -No!” He was author of “You should, refrain from throwing open the floodgates of democracy, lest you should pave the Way for a general conflagration. ” At a rage an Irishman was delighted Because he was “first at last.” When they laughed, he added, “Sure, wasn't I behind before.” One day a friend of Bishop Bramstone approached him with the remark that he wanted “a wife, young, rich and pretty,” and he wanted the bishop to pick her out for him. “Tut, tut F’ said the bishop. “My name is Bramstone, not Brimstone! 1 do not make matches!”—E. P. Powell in St. Louis Globe-Democrat. What May Be. Old Fashioned Passenger (awakening suddenly from a doze)—l beg your pardon for not seeing you standing, madam. Please take my seat. Woman Conductor (shaking him again)—Say, uncle, how much longer are you going to keep me waiting for your fare?—Chicago Tribune.

RIPE AND UNRIPE BANANAS. Those Allowed to Ripen on Tree Are Not the Best Flavored. Whether for shipment or for home consumption the banana is cut as soon as it is ••full”-—that. is, when it has reached its adult form and size, but is still quite green. The plant is cut oft by a single blow of a machete wielded | by a powerful arm. As it falls the | bunch is caught, lopped off and laid aside, while the harvester goes on to the next bunch. It is a popular supposition that bananas “ripened on the tree” are incomparably superior to those cut green. But, as a matter of fact, one never eats them thus ripened in Jamaica. They are said to bo not so good. At all events, one finds no better fruit in texture and flavor than the best of our , own markets. But every lover of this 1 fruit knows that its quality varies extraordinarily as it is offered to us. This I is due partly to the different sources I from which it comes. : The best that is brought to us comes j from Jamah a. It is also due still more ; to the condition of the fruit when cut, 1 Bananas which are perfectly full will ; ripen mellow and delicious, but those i cut when immature, as too many are, will turn yellow, yet never truly ripen, retaining always their hard texture and unripe taste. In Jamaica, as elsewhere, the competition of buyers leads the unscrupulous ones to accept fruit of any sort, even when totally unfit, and this sort of competition makes all the more unavailing the efforts of honest buyers to raise the standard and to teach the people to withhold their fruit until it is properly developed. Americans can give more moral support to these efforts by accepting only such fruit as is mature at any price. A little pains will soon enable one to distinguish good from poor fruit, though it is difficult to give a general statement of the distinctive differences. But, as a rule, it will be found that bananas which arc largest, deepest yellow and least a -alar are the most mature and best.—Popular Science Monthly. AS TO THE FLOOD, DOCTORS DIFFER. Some Think It Local to the Euphrates, Others the Melting of the Ice Age. Suess, in “Das Antlitz der Erde, ” and Neumayer, in “Erdesgeschichte, ” have attempted to show that the Mosaic account of the deluge was copied with little from an original Assyrian version, and that it was a local flood which took place in the plains of the Tigris and Euphrates, not in the valley of the Jordan. In a recent number of Natur Wochenschrift, however, HenRichard Hennig tries to prove that a general flood took place in the ice age during the quaternary period. Many facts, such as evidences of glaciation and lowering of temperature, jfouml in the rocks and in sagas and myths, as well as the vast extension Os a great lake in the far west of Amqjic', • whose level was r, 000 feet above that of the Salt lake; go to prove that floods accompanied the retreat of the glaciers. Countries in warmer latitudes—for example, the Sahara—were Converted into seas and swamps or were locally flooded. Isolated’ lands k< pt clear of the inundation —for instance, Egypt—but we may remind Herr Hennig that, according to Herodotus, Egypt was formerly in great part- a marsh. It is curious to note, ill connection with the glacial theory, that an. old Aryan tradition tells of the “Aryans” having been driven from their original seat by the country becoming colder and the winter longer. The German flood saga tells that “thq floods of the north came far from their home and w’ere turned into ice, and the ice stood still, and the mist which hungover it froze, ” The sun warmed the drops, however, and Ymir of Hrimthursen, the frost giant in the form of a man, was born. Bors killed the giant, and in his blood drowned the race of. Hrinithurseii except- Bergelmir, who, in a boat, saved himself and wife, and from them sprang the new race of Hrimthnrsen. —London Globe. Queer Guests. Lady Morgan records in her “Diary” that while dining at the palace of the archbishop of Taranto she met with guests whose presence would have been' more becoming to the playroom of a boy than to the dining room of ; n Italian prelate. Between the first and second courses the door opened, and several i-normous-ly large and beautiful cats were introduced by the names of Pantaioone, Desdemona, Otello, etc. They rook their places on chairs near the tabl and were as silent, as motionless, as-we 11 behaved, as one could desire. On the bishop requesting one of the chaplains to assist Signora 1 ’esdemona to something, the butler stepiied up to his lordship and observed: “Desdemona will prefer waiting for the roasts. ’’—Youth’s Cemt'- ■ Hot Water For Cows. “Hot water for cows” is the maxim of the French dairy farmers in tho department of Finistere. They,,claim to have'proved by experiments that when cows drink hot water they yield onethird more milk than when they are refreshed with cold water only. Caution must, of course, be observed in adopting the new system. Avaricious dairymen must beware of scalding th,■ throats of their cows in their haste to avail themselves of this discovery, which is vouched for by our consul at Brest. The proportions, we are told, are half a pail of boiling water and half a pail of cold. — London Globe. Right In His Line. A man from the country heard some one talking about the Woman’s Exchange. “Woman’s Exchange?’’he inquired, “what’s that for?” “For the exchange of women,?’ said a wag. „ “Golly,” said the countryman, who looked as though he was henjecked, “I’ll go around and see.”—Kingston Freeman. ' - .

HERE IS CHANGE.... From now on to[the First of January, 1895, You can have THE DEMOCRAT FOR 40 CENCS. Remember this is the Only Democratic Papei’ Published in Adams County.

CAUSE AND EFFECT. j No wonder that tho sea is sod, 1 Or that tho ooean roars; -i ■ The love tales they hear told and told . Must bo such awful bores. J From yachts and Isiats tho story floats, i V All through the summer weather; From stream and strand, where hand 11W hand, Walk man and maid together. . ? - Tho level’s always like damp spots Wherein their vows to make. IB ’ . They mostly choose some brookside or i, Malaria giving lake. | Tho sweet, shy summer budlots come: Till numbers would appall. 1 Perhaps each girl hears one youth rave— fl Tho waters hear them alll Roar pn,O wa! Baugh on, O streami J Anu murm’rlng brooklet bubble. But don’t you take to telling talcs. Or you’ll make lots of troublcl —Now York Recorder. ( PERILS OF BULL FIGHTING. It Is an Easy Matter For Toreros to Meet a Violent Death. ' One is accustomed to hoar bull fighting denounced as both cruel and cowardly—cruel because of the suffering it inflicts upon animals, cowardly because the risk run by the bullfighter is infinitesimal. The first charge is absolutely true, so far at least as concerns the unfortunate horses. The second is equally false, as the tragic death of Esparterq should serve to teach the amateur crit< ics who so" the most part have never seen the spectacle they denounce iu such: unqualified terms. If the Spaniards would only revive the original form of the sport they borrowed from the Moors—that is to say, the riding, not of wretched cab horses, only fit for the knacker and mounted by professional picadores, but. of valuable horses, with “owners up,” wlq would, of course, exercise their skill in trying to save their mounts—there’ would be little to be said against bull fighting on the score of cruelty. As to the Current sneers at the cowardice of the bullfighters, they are the outcome of sheer ignorance. One hasbut to witness the entry into the ring of a fresh caught Andalusian bull twice the size and weight of a lion, fully as I fierce and almost as active to under- ; stand that everyman in the ringcanies j his life in his hand, and that a momen- ! tary loss of nerve, of judgment or of : footing will probably mean instant death. That terrible fighting “spear”— Spaniard never talks of a bull’s “horn’ll any more than an Englishman of a fox’# J “tail”—would make short work of anyll man who had not devoted the flower ofl his age to tbo study of the most perils • ous of all forms of sport. Those whdw have seen such daring and accomplished toreros as Lagartljo or Frascuelo tak« the cloak from the hand of a nate and play with tho infuriated beast | as a child might with a kitten, know-1 ing all, the time that the slightest mis-1 take would be fatal, cannot, if theyl speak the truth, refuse to admit that tho 1 combination of skill and courage is un- 1 paralleled. Tbo peri Is of the plaza re- i deem the sport from the charge of cow- •: ardice, though not. as it is at present conducted, from that of cruelty. —London Graphic. Size es a Whale’s Throat. One of .the favorite arguments of the skeptic is that the Biblical story of Jonah and the whale cannot be true simply because the books on natural history say that such animals have very small throats. A photon’s American Cyclopedia says, ‘ ‘The food of whales consists only of the sniallest of the marine mpllusca, a herring "being the largest fish they can swallow. ” Chambers’ Encyclopedia, in the article “Whale,” says: “The gullet of whales is very narrow. It is said not to be more than linches in diameter cyen in a large whale, so that only very small ainmals can pass through it. ” In McMillan’s book on the curiosities of the ocean, “The Sea and Its Denizens,” chapter 3, page 69, I find the following: “That the story of Jonah and tho whale cannot be refuted, simply because such animals have, as a rule, very small gullets or throats may be inferred from the fact that there are certain species of tho sperm whale now : living that can swallow an object 2 feet in diameter. I myself was present at i Lamarck when a buoy as large as a 12 ] gallon-water cask, and greater in diam- 1 eter than tho chest and shoulders of a j 200 pound man, was taken from the ) belly of a whale which was not more than two-tuirds grown.”—St. Louis: Republic. A Dog With Eyeglasses. Pedestrians on Market street the other morning jostled each other to see a novel sight. A huge dog, With a sleek drab skin and a generally contented look, plodded along the thoroughfare; wearing spectacles of large size astridehis shapely nose. The dog was not at all inconvenienced seemingly, and ap*a parently was not aware that ho was do-1 ing anything out qf the ordinary, as he critically surveyed tho public through the spectacle glasses. The were much too large for any human be-| ing, and probabjy were made with glasses without magnifying power, at; the order of some waggish owner.—Sam Francisco Bulletin. ■rThe Reverend Jasper. / Rev. John Jasper, of Richmond, tho most noted of all slave preachers, is nowover 80 yer .s old and believes as firmly as he did in 1878, when his famous sermon was preached, that “the sun do move. ” He recently gave an outline of that celebrated discourse, which, he says, was composed in order to set at rest some doubts which had arisen in the mind of a young member of his flock. —Chicago Herald. A man may float in salt water without moving his hands or feet if he has the presence of mind to throw his head back and allow the body to sink to the 4 position which it will then naturally takb. In 1287 a teacher in Florence hhdl his bouse burned and built a now resi-1 denoe by selling two volumes of Cicero. 1