Crawfordsville Weekly Journal, Crawfordsville, Montgomery County, 25 June 1868 — Page 4
WIT AND "WISDOM.
Rustic
pugilism—A box in the
country.
Sheet music—The cry of children in bed.
Sanguinary revolution Circulation of the blood.
Circulating medium—An itinerant spiritualist.
When is a swan's breast
woman's hair like When it's down
How long does a widow mourn for her husband? She mourns for a second.
The oldest hiccup.
cup on record—The
What is the worst kind of husbandry? When a man in clover marries a woman in weeds.
The London
Times
begins an edi
torial "Now that Italy has come by her own, would she be so kind as to take back her organ-grinders
Y'
An eminent painter, on being asked what he mixed his colors with to give so fine an effect, answered, -'I mix them with brains, sir."
A young thief, who was charged with picking pockets, demurred to the indictment, saj'ing that he had always taken them just as they came.
"Do you like Owen Meredith V" asked the poet of his rural friend." "I don't like owin' Meredith, or any other man}-," was the reply.
A gentleman, in lecturing for the Blind Asylum, began by gravely remarking, "If all the world were blind, what a melancholy sight it would be!"
A man out West, who offered bail for a friend, was asked by the judge if he had any incumbrance on his farm. "Oh, 3*es," said he, "my old woman."
CAUGHT NAPPING.—Anastute member of the legal profession, looking over some old documents recently, so far lorgot himself as to mistake the "will" for the "deed."
That young man to whom the world owes "a living" has been turnedout of doors—his landlady not being willing to take the indebtedness of the world on her shoulders.
Matrimony is hot buckwheat cakes, warm beds, comfortable slippers, smoking coffee, round arms, red lips, kind words, shirts exulting in buttons, redeemed stockings, boot-jacks, happiness, etc. Hurrah!
A sailor, exhorting at a prayermeeting in a London chapel, said that on dark stormy nights, wliile.on the sea, he had often been comforted by that passage of Scripture. "A faint heart never won a fair ladv."
TO HUSBANDS.
The edict is spoken! And skirts shall no more Of daughters and wives .«\voep
Society's floor. But, husbands, rejoicing Too soon would be wrong If the dresses are short. Still yotir bills will be long.
Sir Walter Scott, in lending a book one day to a friend, cautioned hiin to be punctual in returning it. "This is really necessary," said the poet, in apology "for though all my friends are bad arithmeticians, I observe almost almost all of them to be good bookkeepers."
"Good morning, Mr. Henpeck," said a printer in search of female compositors "have 3*011 got any daughters that would make good type-setters -'No, but I have got a wife that would make a very fine devil."
A gentleman who entered a barber's shop to get shaved, was recommended by the operator to raise a mustache. "It is impossible," replied the gentleman. "Oh, no," insisted the tonsorial artist—"Oh, no! I am certain, sir, you could raise a mustache!"
When you see a man in business lvho will not advertise or take a newspaper, look out for a mean, penurious skinflint, too tight too enjoy good health, and who holds a penny so near his eyes that he can't see a dollar. :AA clergyman happening to get wet, was standing over the fire to dry his clothes, and when his colleague came in he asked him to preach for him, as he was wet. "No, sir, I thank you," was the prompt reply "preach yourself you will be dry enough in the pulpit."
I was sitting beside My destined bride,
One still sentimental day: How I long said i, But to make you cry, And I'd kiss the bright tears away!"
Fair Cecily blush'd, Her voice grew liush'd, I thought she would cry to lie sure
But she lisped to 111 e, Pouting prettily,
"Prevention is better than cure!"
An Italian inn-keeper confessed to a priest, who asked him if he never greased the teeth of his guests' horses to prevent their eating. He replied that he had never done so. The next time he confessed that he ad committed the act several times. "Why," said the priest, "you told me last time that you had never done it." "Holy Father," replied the innkeeper, "I did not know the trick then."
Things We Should Much Like See. A fruit tree that keeps away pilfer
ers by its
own bark.
Gas that would go out at night and come in again in the morning. A sauce pan that will boil over with rage when the cook is insulted.
A clock that is so conceited as not to run down its own works. The coat of a poor man's stomach to see if it is out at the elbows).
irowrsi:. FARM AND OAKDJSX...
THE
Canada Farmer
is of the
opinion that clover seed is not reiliable when it is more than two vears old.
IT is just as easy to raise a bushel of good apples as a bushel of poor ones. What is a dollar or two of expenses in getting good trees
ONE cattle ranche in Texas is 50 miles in extent the number of head is 100,000 and 20,000 are sent to market every year, enough to supply the New York market six* weeks.
IT is said that sheep kept with cows are not so apt to be killed by do^s as alone. The cows fight for them.
Tine
Country Gentlemen
say's It-
cows are fed on early cut timothy, put up in good order, the butter will come with little trouble.
THE average income per acre from the vineyards on Lake Erie, last year, was about $227—and rather more than the usual average.
AXOKEW S. FUIJ-KH, of New York, author of
Small Fruit Cult wrist,
says that with him eoal ashes are worth $3 or 84 a load, especially on sandv laud.
IN setting out orchards, a register, in which every tree is marked and its name put down, should be regarded as indispensable. Memory can't be trusted to keep names and varieties until bearing time.
Fon French or Saratoga, Rolls— Boil one pint of milk, cut up two ounces of butter in one pund of flour, one egg beaten, one tablespoonful of yeast beat these well together: when risen, form into roll, with as little handling as possible, and bake in a brisk oven.
IN gathering apples, if straw is spread under the tree when the branches are being jarred, the apples falling on the straw will not be bruised, and will keep as perfectly as when hand-picked. By this means 11 fruit ladders are needed.
ADHESIVE wash for fences can be made by putting a half pound of tallow or lard into one gallon of slacked lime, and apply it while warm. The utility of adding tallow must be obvious to all minds, viz to penetrate the wood, and to shed the rain without destroving the. wash.
A CORRESPONDENT of the
J\rew Yorker,
Bur a I
says a neighbor of his
saved a fine litter of pigs from a ravenous sow by the following plan: He took the pigs away and gave the mother a pint of whisky, which made her drunk, and while in that condition he carefully replaced the pigs, and she was afterwards as good a mother as was necessarv.
STAY ON THE FARM.—The cities and villages are already overcrowded, and every kind of business languishes more than the cultivation of the earth In the cities the labor market is overstocked, and one can get any desired number of hands for any conceivable job. Clerks from the countrv have usually to serve two or three years before they can get living wages. The city throngs with unemployed men and women, waiting for something to turn up. Those who find employment have no security for permanence. Mechanics lose their places, and have* to lie idle for weeks and months together. All the products of skill and labor arc relatively cheaper than provisions and breadstuffs.
The great material want of the nation is cheaper meats, cheaper grain and vegetables. We have merchants, mechanics, and middle men enough, but far too few farmers. The best cultivated State abounds in uncultivated lands. Even in the vicinity of our large towns and cities, cheap lands abound, and splendid chances for enterprising 3roung men to win homes and fortune. Once settled upon his own acres the farmer has constant, profitable occupation before him. Nowhere is unskilled labor so sure of sustenance, nowhere will intelligent industry so surely win a happ3* home and competence. In the countrv one never need to lack labor, and labor brings there the necessaries and comforts of life.—Amer
ican Af/ric ultwrist.
Enoch Ar«leu Outdone at T,asl. Nathan Swin, a nice young mechanic, had a pretty wife and four children. Swin took a boarder, a freight conductor on the C. R. I. & P. Railroad, who stole the pretty woman's affections and became very naughty. Swin begged of his wife, at various times, to change her conduct and he he would forgive her. She wouldn't reform, and so Swin divided his goods with her and helped her ship them West in company with her seducer. The woman got into the caboose and bade her husband goodbye as coolly as though he were a rascal and said "You've got the woman. If you ever desert her or misuse her, and I hear of it, I'll kill 3*011. You've done enough to injure me— —don't repeat it with her," and off they started for the far West.
Tlie School master Abroad. This famous expression of Lord Brougham is explained by him in a letter, dated August 15, 1857, to a correspondent, and now published for the first time. Brougham says The expression of the schoolmaster being abroad, was first used by Lord B. in the debate of 28th of January, 1828, in the House of Commons. What he meant was that the schoolmaster was in the field to instruct the people, and that they had no occasion to fear oppression from other quarters. It had been a common saying before that the soldier was abroad, and would have his own in the world." The soldier was the duke of Wellington, and Brougham intended to assert the impossibility of governing England bv military law.
DRY-COODS.
McClure, Fry & Co.
HAVE THE-
BEST ASSORTED
-STOCK OK—•
O O S
IN THE STATE,
A.VD A RE HETEimrXEl) TO
SELL THEM CHEAPER
—TIT AX
ANY OTHER HOUSE
-IV-
ATI. WHO WANT TO BUY
GOODS FOR CASH
A X-
MAKE MONEY
-BY
Ml
r/l'MV?
MEDICAL.
PURIFY YOUR BLOOD.
Hurley's Sa.rsapari 11a
Ocovedthe
Fall remedies that have boon lisduriiigthe present age for (lie housand ills which flesh is heir to, none equal this wonderful preparation. Only ten years have elapsed since the discoverer "(who spent a decade in studying experiments, and perfecting it first, introduced it to the public., and it is already recognized by the most eminent physicians in all parts of the country, to be the most surprising and effective, remedy for certain diseases of which they have knowledge.
All other Compounds or Syrups of Mi is root have hitherto failed to command the sanction of faculty, because being tested, they have been found to contain noxous ingredients, which neutralize the good effect of the Sarsaparilla, and oftentimes injure the health of the patient. It is not "so with Hurley's preparation.
This is the pure and genuine extract of the root, and will, 011 trial, be found to effect a certain and perfect cure of the follow ing complaints and diseases: Affections of the Bones, Habitual Costiveness, Debility, Diseases of the Kidney, ...... .Dyspepsia, Ervsipilas, Female Jr. regularities, Vistula, all Skin 1 )icases, Liver Complaint, Indigestion, Piles, Pulmonary, Diseases, Svpliiliis, Scrofula'oi
King's Evil.
i:. J. liI 1 A liltOTEI 10 It. A»KXTS.
Hurley's .Ague Tonic!
PERFECTLY RELIABLE.
The only remedy for Chills and Fever or Ague and Fever that is or can be depended upon is .HURLEY'S AGUK TOXIC. There have been thousands cured by using it who had tried the usual remedies "wit hout benefit: but in no case has
HURLEY S AGUE TONIC
failed to effect a cure. All who have used it cheerfully tell their afflicted friends of it, as I a sure and certain cure for Chills and Fever. I Any one suffering from the Chills would consult their own interest by sending to a drugstore and buying a bottle. It is pleasant to take, compared with others, and will be certain to cure all cases of Fever and
Ague or Chills and Fever. Send for it to the proprietors, James ituddlc it Co.. LotiisI villc. Ky.
K. J. BlXKOIll) & liltO.. Airents. ('ratvfonlsrlllv.
lllHLKV-S
POPULAR WORM CANDY,
As this is really a specilic for worms, and the HEST AND MOST L'ALATABI/K KOK.M to give to children, it is not surprising that it is fast taking taking the place of all other 'preparations for worms—it being perfectly tasteless, and children will take it. .1 A^I FS IS I" I I I l"Z iV' ('(Proprietors.
HURLEY'S STOMACH BITTERS!
For
I Debility, Loss of Appctile, Weakness. Indigestion, or Dyspepsia.
Want of Action of Liver. OH DISORDERED STOMACil, There are 110 Hitters can compare with those in removing the distressing complaints. For sale or can he had at any druir store in the United States, or from the proprietors..
ail
A W FORDS VILLE.
JAMKSHi:ilLK CO.. Louisville, Ky.
K. J. ItlN'Kol'I) it I,11(.. Agent-.
mcTTisoiNr.s
I ENGLISH HORSE LINIMENT
Has proved itself to lie one of the hest Liniments made for Sprains, IJruises, etc., in all cases when tried for man or beast, and will da all we claim for it. Try a bottle, and we are satisfied you will never afterwards use
(it lllT.
soricn
I JAMES
OF THEJfl.
MCCI/TRE. FRY & CO.
my23'GG (noS CG.)
TO JIOTIIIM
I»K. KF.AIlltOOK'S
Infant Soothing Syrup!
"We have by purchase of the original re-
cei]t,
became sole proprietors of this celebrated Medicine, We ask you to give it trial, with an assurance that you will in future discard all those nauseous and destructive stuffs, such as Btateman's Drops, GodI'rey's Cordial, Dawec's Mixtures, etc., combinations of a past and anti-progressive age, when it was thought that the more disgusting the mixture the better the medicine.
Use in the future only SEABTlOOIv'S a combination quite up with the advancement
I
of the age. Pleasant to take, harmless in its action, efficient and reliable in all cases. Invaluable in the following cases:
SUMMER COMPLAINT, IRM'XiULAIM-
TIES, OF THE BOWELS, RES
TIVEXESS. TEETHING.
1
trial. -K
RUDDL &
llt.
WOOL
4
ttc., Arc., «fcc., »tc.
1 (Jives health to the child and rest to the mother. Wc could furnish any quantity of certilieat.es bearing evidence'of its superior qualiI ties, but prefer that our medicine should stand 011 its own merits, which it will upon
co.,
l»KOI»IUKTORS. fiOiiisvillc, Ky
J. IMMOltl) BKO., A are 11 is. t'rawforris villc. Intl.
SE.VBItOOK'S
ELIXIR OF PYROPHOSPHATE
OF IRON AND CAUSAYA.
This elegant combination possesses al the best tonic proprieties of Peruvian Bark and Iron, without the disagreeable taste and bad effects of either, separately or in other preparations of these valuable medicines. It should be taken in all cases when a gentle tonic impression is required—after convalescence from fevers or other delibilitating diseases, or in those distressing irregularities peculiar to females. No female should be without it, if liable to such diseases, for nothing can well take its place.
JAMES RUDDLE & CO., Prop'rs,
I.Ol'lSVlLLE, KENTUCKY.
E. J. l!IFOItD. «fc RKOT1IKK. Agents, Orawfordsvillc. Indiana.
.Jtilv 11, 1.SG7. yl.
Of the best English make. A large stock of MECHANIC'S TOOLS, cheap for cash.
Superior to ail others in the market, than you can get at any other place. May 28, 1868.
iSLT
OK*'noons,
GRAHAM HOUSE.
E A S 8 I N E S
BLANKETS, FrAIVlVEL.S,
YAM.S, and all kinds of
A O W O O E S
In Exchange for
AGRICULTURAL IMPLEMENTS AND HARDWARE.
AGAIN Il¥ FULL BLAST
Having purchased the entire slock of Canine Ar: Gregg, I am now prepared to olfcr extra inducement:may need anything in the Hardware line. I have a large assortment of
IRON, NAILS, GLASS, STEEL, HORSE NAILS AND SHOES,
At Lafayette or Indianapolis prices. Also, a good assortment of lilaeksmilii's Tools. s.ueh as
Anvils, Vises, Stocks and Dies,
EVERY VARIETY OF BUILDING MATERIAL
At a small advance on ."Manufacturers' prices.'v Also the largest stock of
Pockoi, & Talle Cutlery, Silver "Plated "Knives
Forks and Spoons, ever offered in this market, Having imported them direct from manufacturer, am ofl'erin them at prices that: cannot fail to suit everybody. Farmers come and see the In.rgest sloe
AGRICULTURAL IMPLEMENTS
Evei .offered in this market. I am agent for the world-renowned
"Willi Dropping Attachments, the most complete "Reaper & Mower A!.-
McSherry's GRAIN BRILL
"Which has no equal as a Seed Sower. Also
A. GARR & CO.'S RICHMOND THRESHER & SEPARATOR
WOOL WANTED.
"W-A-HSTTIEID! W-A-ItTTIEIDH
ONE MILLION POUNDS OF WOOL
ET EXCHANGE FOIL GOODS,
AT FACTORY PRICES.
ALSO, A
FIFTY THOUSAND DOLLAR STOCK
—OF—
HEJin I* lifitMIMMS CldOTMHJYf*,
€\flRM*FTS,
Ij W It .F Ml,
MMTS, C.fMPS,
Come cvervbodv and see the Mammoth, and buy more goods for less inonev
BOOTS SHOES
WOOF, SMWGFjFS
NEW GOODS RECEIVED DAILY
From New York, Boston and Philadelphia, for the next ninety days.? Will give the hisrhest price for WOOL at the apr23] GRAHAM ESTABLISHMENT.
I STORE
lo all who
lab pallern^ and best make, verv
S. H. CRECC.
FOR THE HAIR.
Pit FJl I I'M
OF A SILVER MEDAL
j-y BARRETT'S HAIR RESTORATIVE By tbo N. H. KtJitc Agricultural Society.
BAHRETT 3
Vegetable Hair Restorative iRbecomiug the pulur article for Restoring ami Beniuilyuig the Hv.r. throughout the Kast, West, North ami Sooth. Its superior quality aud adaptation to tnc wuuts of the public, must Insure its complete success.
It will shortly appear in the Kurt pean Journao. 4 R.BARRETT 3*
CO-
Prop's,
^'(-'/JESTER.
LORD & SMITH, CHICAGO, leneral Agents for the northwestern States
For sale by
F. J. milJYFOMtn A' BKO.,
CIt A WFORDS VI LLE, 1NDI ANA. je4yl
COLD PEWS.
"TIic Pen Is im-lillcr tlian tI»o Sword.
DO NOT EJIl OUT.
A
SINGLE ONE WILL LAST A-LIFETIME
I3Y TPIJniR TJSI3
TIIE LAS0P. 0V WRITING IS SEDUCED. Grenter Uniformity is Obtained.
K'tsf,. FJajmice and Beauty are acq nil"
PLEASURE AND PROFIT C0\.-i!'!/u:
The Llest, Cheapest, and most Durable ments for Writing ever used.
SS&ST
BY EV3AIL SAFELY a. FiUy Ccnls and upward.
i- Prio
NO TRAVELING AQT5ITTS EMPLOYED
!nll iiti'l you will liiiil IVu rx.iotly to
I.i
-I'tinl Hlylcof v. iliiij-: or
I II
I-
S
011
#c. &*c, &'c.
8tii!
25 MAIl'K.V l,AXK.
NEW
BLACKSMITH INC.
A S I I N
IN ALT.
ITS BRANCHES.
TIE undersigned would respect, ully inform the public that they are carrying
the above, business in all its various brandies. From along and practical experience in the business, they feel confident in assuring the public that their work and prices will give entire satisfaction. They are well prepared to iron wagons, buggies, ifcc., and shoe horses in the most desirable and approved style, and
011
short, notice.
Repairing of all kinds done with despatch. Particular attention given to mending and sharpening plows.
They ask the public to give them a trial, as they feel confident of giving satisfaction. &3F" Shop on Green street, between Pike and South streets. apr23 GEO. IIIGIITOWER & FIIOI.
WACONS.
Superior "Wagons.
JS.
MILLER & CO. have on hand and for sale the celebrated Studebaker Wagons. aprl'.T
MEDICAL.
FOUTHE
•^li^ht Insertion, Palpitati ii'-. ,Vf.. and *.vi1 clH'Cl a oil have failed and. alt!', not contain 'iiloiti rirtfid to the ciusstir ii'd ladies »:i 1 Vi regul.iti-.i- th' arwill, in a s:.nrt Ii o.| with regularity. irrioN.- -Marii-.l i! when there is any
do
:r
1M
nr.-
if
A Positive Remedy for all kinds of Humors,
Scrofuia, Scurvy. Salt-Rheum, Carbunies and Boiis, Ulcers and all obstinate vfFections of the Skin, Inflammatory
Chronic Rheumatism, Piles, Cbrcnio Jiarrhosa, Mercurial Diseases, and ov .ry 2int of the System Dyspepsia, and fuse iffcctior.s originating in the Deran^enivnt if the Digestive Organs viz., Ci'lous Jomplaints, Neuralgia, and Nervous Abactions, Headache, Languor,and prcsion of Spirits,
Loss of
tation.
rHprepared
Appetite, Cor.sti-
IS exoollonl rhtdiclnal conipM first by Dr. .1. W. POLAND, in 1M7, ml was tliou employed with preuf siui-es- in spelling humors from tlio blood but in isjs ledic.i! friend who was quite celebrated a nliysi ian, especially in the treatment of h:imoi, sus?ested some important improvements, which were dopted, and which hns made it (so th" people say) lie very best remedy lot all kinds of humors known r) the faculty."'
This preparation is composed en!i-elv of vefrcta Ics, among which are Sarsaparil!.!, Yellow Duck, i'oble 1'ine, JIandrako, aud Iiloodroo
When the originator lived in New Hampshire, at Joflstown Centre, for the space of thirty or turfy niles around, and in Manchester particularly, I he Iumor Doctor was well known and highly valued or the numerous and wonderful cures which i: el
ected. Though manufactured iu largo iiuanihit's, he supply was frequently exhausted, and jmrc'iav rs had to wait foi more lo be made. In that reion, some very severe cases of Krysipelas wenreated with, —and they were cured! Erysipelas ores, or carbuncles,—those ujjiy, painful ulcer.-, -were entirely removed wherever this medicine ras faithfully used. So it was with .S.-rofula and iHlt-Iihoum. The Humor Doctor cured ,'tfni.
It is free. Irom any dangerous drugs, Is ph-usam to lie taste, safe, yet sure and effective in its action.
l'KIil'AKKO
AT THE
SEW- ENGLAND BOTANIC DEPOT,
And for sale by all Dealers in Medicine.
C. DAMON & CO., Proprietors.
For sale by
Vy & Co.,
T. Fr ('rawfordsville. and \rent, Cincinnati. je4yl
J. I). Park, Wholesale
Ladles, Take £*»rtir.u!»r iVotli-e.
THE REAL VELPEAU I'FiALF PILLS.
[WARRAN I E!'
1M1.I
ceit-b'a
many years agn in Paris fur tin: relief of female irregularities. «Uil afterwards so notorious for their erioiinal employment, in t'r.o practice of a hot tion, are
t!BD
IIU*
olV"I il
LOR
sale for tho first time in America. They have been kept in comparative o'lsemiiy, from the fact that the originator. Dr. Velpt-au, is a physician in Paris, of great wealth and Miiet conscientious principles, and ha^ withold era a for unlawful purposes.
In overcoming Fem '.le O'o-tinc:ions. 1 11 *5 af the Womb. Whites. (Jreen Si -kiies-. 1 j» .r 3ion. Iietentiou, or Immodi'iat*' lo.\ o. i.o Monthly Discharge", Xorvo^s no .-'j.mal W the Back n.i-l l.iiu'os. «.•
of the Iie 11 11
ulies sV
ii-'
ili--.irri. »i rim—• rii:Ij.ti j,
•I.
to M. W. MACITJIBER, General Agent for tlie United Stales and Canadas, at Albany, X. Y., or li. K. Krout, and I3inford it Bro., TJrawfordsville, and Druggists everywhere. apr23 till octS'08
RING'S VEGETABLE AMBROSIA. JRIIVGS-'S
GRAY HAIR.
This is the
AMBROSIA
that KiDgmndo.
This ifl the Cure that lay In the A that King made.
This is the Man who was bnld and gray, Who now tins raven locks, they say.v He used the Cure that lay In the AMHUKSIA that King made.
This is tlie Mniden, handsome and guy, Who married the man onee bald and gray. Who now has raven locks, they say. Me used the AMUKOSIA that Ring mane.
This is the Prirson, who, by tho way, Married the maiden, handsome and gay, To tho" man once bald and gray, Hut who now has raven locks, l!i"y say. Because used the Cure that lay In the
Ahe
MBROSIA that Rine tna«ie.
This is .,:- -!1 thnf rings away To aroi ,-e ji:i• peopi" sail and L'nto lliis wlii' hero does I:. If yon vmthl }c hi- h- hi or tyuji. (:.e. the Amr: ,s .\ ir.
E. «J. TU3BS & 00., Pao
jr
For sale bj'
fUU
T. W. Fry & Co., Crawfortlsville, Ind. May 11,1868-mG.
71 VERY Business Man needs somethin
in the way of Job Printing. We neeel ,T
scarcely add that you can get your Printing
done to the best advantage at the JOURNAL JOB OFFICE.