Bloomington Progress, Volume 5, Number 44, Bloomington, Monroe County, 28 February 1872 — Page 1

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HOOFLAND'S GERMAN BITTERS, HOOFLAND'S GERMAN TONIC, HOOFLAND'S PODOPHYLUN PILL, HOOFLAND'S GREEK OIL

A. Republican Paper, Devoted to the Advancement of the Local Interests of Monroe County. Establislie a7ik,185. BLOOM INGTOX, INDIANA, WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 28, 1S72. New Serles.-VOL.V.-NO. 44.

HENRY T. HELMBOLD'S COMPOUND FLUID

Extract Catawba HooflancTs German Bitters, Q R A P E FILLS

(hm2Jf'ent Ptrtx Fl:iid Extract Mhubarb and Fiuic'. Extract Catawba Orape Juioe.

A Bitten wit lion t Alcobol or Spirits otf auay kind,

Is different from all others. 1 1 is composed of the pure juices or vital fbiscipaj. of Roots, Herbs, and Babks (or aa medioioally termed, extracts), the worttiloss or inert portions of the ingredients not being used. Therefore, in one bottle of this Bitters there ia contained as much medicinal virtue as will be found in several gallons of ordinary mixtures. The Roots, etc., used in this Bit ters are grown in Germany, their vital principles extracted in that country by a scientific Chemist and forwarded to the manufactory in this city, whore they are compounded and bottled. Containing no sptritnotwing redients, this Bitters is free from the objections urged against all others , no desire for stimulants can bo induced from their use, they cannot make drunkards, and cannot, under any circumstances, have aay hat a beneficial effect.

Hoofland's German Tonic

Was compounded for those not inclined to extreme bitters, and is intended for use in casoa when some alcoholic stimulant is required in connection with the Tonic properties of the Bitters. Each bottle of the Tonic contains one bottle of the Bitters, combined with pure Santa Ckuz Bex, and flavored in such a mannet that the extreme bitterness of the Bitters is overcome, forming a preparation luy'iiy agreeable and pleasant to the palate, and containing the medicinal virtues of the Bitters. The price of the Tonic is $1.50 per bottle, which many persons think too high. They most take into consideration that the stimulant used is guaranteed to be of a pure quality. A poor article could be furnished at a cheaper price, but is it not better to pay a little more and have a goodarticlo? A. medicinal preparation should contain none but the best ingredientstnd they who expect to obtain a heap compound will most certainly be cheated. They are the Greatest Known Benedict For IXVEB COMPLAINT, DYSPEPSIA, NERVOUS DEBILITY, JAUNDICE, DISEASE OP THE KIDNEYS, ERUPTIONS OF THE SKIN, and all diseasees arising from a disordered Liver, Stomach, or ntPUBITY OF THE BLOOD. Bead the following symptoms Constipation, Flatulence, In war i Piles, Full neas of Blood to the Head, Acidity of the Stomach, Nausea, Heart-bum, Disgust for Food, Fullness or Weight in the Stomach, Sour Eructations, Sinking or Fluttering at th Pit of the Stomach, Swimming of the Head. Harried or Difficult Breathing, Flattering at the Heart, Choking or Suffocating Sensation when in a Lying Posture, Dimness of Vision, Dots or Webs before the Sight, Dull Pain it the Head, Deficiency of Perspiration, Yellowness of the Skin and Eyes, Pain in the Side. Back, Chest, Limbs, 4c, Sadden Flushes at Heat, Burning in the Flesh, Constant Imaginings of Evil, and Great Depression of Spirits All these indicate Disease of the Liver or Digestive Organs combined with impure blood. The ass of the Bitters or Tonic will noor. cause the above symptoms to disappear, anil the patient will become well and healthy.

Dr. Hoofland's Greek Oil,

Lightning Can for All Kinrta or Patina maul AeJus.

- Ajtukd Extkrsaixt. It will core all kinds of Pains and Aches, such as BueumatUm, Neuralgia, Toothache, Chilblains Spnuim, Bruises, Frost Bites, Headaches, Pains in tl:e Back and Laina, Pains in the Joints or Limbii, Stings of Insects, Bingworma, etc Taxes ItrracrAiXT. It will cure Kidney Compbints, Backaches, Sick Headache, Coli Dysentery, Diarrbosa, Cholera Infantum, Cholera Morbus, Cramps and Pains in the Ktonr ach, Fever and Ague, Coughs, Colds, Asthm i. etc Dr. Hoofland's Podophyllin, OR Kl'BHTITIJTK FOB .1JKRCUKY PIl.L TWO PILLS A D08E. The most powerful, yet innocent, VegetaljU Cathartic known. It is not necessary to take a handful of these Pills to produce the desired effoct ; two of them act quickly and powcrf illy, cleansing the Liver, Stomach, and Bowels of all imparities. The principal ingredient is Podoplrllm, or the Alcohclio Extract of Mandrakc.wliicU is by many times more Powerful, Acting, and Searching, than the Mandrake itself . Itb peculiar action is upon the Liver, cleaning : t speedily from all obbtractioa.-i, with all tie power of Mercury, yet freo from th9 injurious results attached to the use of tliat mineral. For all diseases, in winch the use of a cathartic is indicated, these Pills will give entire satisfaction in every case. They never fail In cases of Liver Complaint, Drspep&U., ud extreme Costiveness, Dr. Hoot ami's Gcr-.nin Bitters or Tonic should be used in connect:, n

with the Pills. The tonic effect of the V. ; : r rs or Tonic builds up the system. The Bitten' r , Tonic puriiics the Blond, utrongthens the nerves, regulates the Liver, and gives strength, energy, and vigor. Keep your Bowels active with the Pills, B'id tone up the system with Bi'teru or Tonic, e -d no disease can retain its hoid, or ever ase iil yon. Them medicines are sold b;' all Druggists and dea ers in medicines every where. Recollect that it is Da. Hoon-von's GrM s BsxEnrss, that are so universally used and highly recommended; and do not allow the Druggist to induce you to take anything c se that he may say is joist as good, bcrav.sb be makes a larger profit on it. These Kemct! i will be sent by Express to any locality, nj on application to the PRINCIPAL OFFICE, r.i the GERMAN MEDICINE STORE, 631 AH H STREET, PHILADELPHIA. CSLA. BK. UVAJra, Proprietor, formerly C. M. JACKS03 & CO. These Remedied art for Site by Druggi! , Storekeepers, and Medicine jMalers, erir;- , throughout the United States, Vanatt, 0vUh America, and the Wett Indies.

FOR L.T.VEB COMPLAIS'TS, JAfSDICE, BILIOUS AlYEOTKKiS, SICK OH NKRVOCH HEADACHE, :osnvtNEsa Ere. fithey vboetabi.e, OONTAlNISG NO MEUCJBY MINERALS, OR lELETEBIOTJS D.iUUS.

Theso Pills are the most dol ghtfully pleaaaut pu::ative,superstUiEg castor oU,talU,nutgnesU,etc. Ttore is nothing more acceptable for the atoitach, Ttu pive tone, ami auso neither nausea nor Rttpiufi; "laina. They are coiaposeu o! the finest ingveMcn 'i After a few do; ' nse of thum, such an invigoption of tho entirc'iyuteni taket place as toappesr minnAim to the v eak and enervated, whether arising from imprudence or diaeaae. H. T. Helmboid's Compound Fix .id Extract Catawba Grape Pill" are net angar-ooated, fremttefae: that sugar-coiled Pills do Dot dissolve, but ptuta tbi-ough the stomach without di-wilving, eenaeqnently do not produce tho de;Ued efliH-t. THE CATAV.-BAlBAPEPIIJt.S7be-

inf- ploaaaut, m taeto and oaor, 10 noi neoeaaitate th.ir lein BUgar-cOiited. PRICE FIFTY CENTS

PER BOX.

BBXflK.'Sr T. HXiUIEBOUD'S: HlOHLV CONCE-NTBi TED COKPOCHS Fluid Extract Sarsaparilla Will-readilv ertennir.ato fro-n thi system 8'.rofnla, RvpblUs. Fever Borer, Itlcerw, 8or Byea, Soi Iiegs, Bro Mrith, Korc Head, Brmchilis, Btin Biseaaes, Sa V Rheum, CanKen, Banning fr )m the Ear, White Sfl'elli: ga. Tmnors, Cancen-iue iilfeotic'na. Node, Rkketa, OlandiUnr Swellings Nl(ht Sweats, Bash, Tetter, Humors of aa kinds CUr mie Blienmatiam, Irrspepsia, anC all Aiiieasna tliat hare been established . u the eyatom for rears.

BEING PREPAR:!D ESPRE6SLT FOR THE ABOVE C0MPLAIM8, ITS BlXUVPORIFYINO PROPERTIES ARE '3REATER TUAK ANY OTHER PREPARATION OF 8AB8APAU11A.. IT GIVES

TEE COMPLEXION! A CIJ2AB ANT HEALTHY COLOR, AND RESTORES THE PATIENT TO A STATE OF HEALTH ANDPURl'TY. FOlt PURIFY-

INO THE BL001 BEMOVINU ALIj CHRONIC

C0NSTIT17TIONAI DISEASES ARIS-, 1 1TIOM

AK IMPURE STATE OP THE BIOOD, AND THE OVLY RELIABLE AND EFFECT! AT' RNOTN REMEDY 1'OR THE CURE OF PA tNS .A ND 8WELL1NO Of THE BOIIE8, CI-CERnTIONS OF THE THROAT AND LEGS, BLOTCHI.S, PIMPLES ON THE FACE, ERYSIPELAS AND A IMC ALY ERUPTIONS OF THE 8K::N, AND BEiUTTFYING THE COMPLEXION. PIJCEtl,50PiBOTTXX.

SEBZTRV V. BISZAXBOiZaD'S CONCENTRATED FLUID EXTRACT BUCHU, THE GREAT DITTRI.TIC, ha cured erery cast) of DIABETES in which it has Ijenn given . IBRI1 ATION OF TI !E NECK OF THE Bl ADDER AND INFLAMMATION OF THE KIDNLYS, MACERATION OF THE .1IDNEY.S AND BLADDER, RETEJTION OF t'HIWE, DISEASES OF THE PROSTRATE GLAND, STONE IN THE BLADDER, CALCIHiS, GRAVEL, BRICK-DUST DEPOSIT, AND MUCOUS OR MI LKY DISCHARGES, AND FOB ENI JELLED AND DELICATE CON' fVTlTTJTICNSOF BOTH SEXES, ATTENDED WITH THE FOL1X)WING SYMPTOMS : INDISPOSITION TO EXEI.TION, TX8 OF PCWER, LOSS OF MEMORY, DIFFICULTY CF BEUATHING, WEAK NJiRVES, TREMBLING, HORl'.OK OF DISEASE, WAKEFULNESS, I IMNES8 OF VTSIOX, PAIN IN THE BACK, HOT HANDS, FLUSHING OF THE BODY, DRYNESS OF THE 8KI, ERUPTION ON THE FACE, PALLID COUNTENANCE, UNIVERSAL LASSITUDE OF THE MUSCULAR SYSTEM, ETC. Csed by peraoni: from -he ages of eighteen to twnnty-tlTe, and from thirry-favetr flfty-flv or in i.ho d'cliiu orhnige oflif.-: afttT coiflnemsnt or iaor jrixtiu ; lieti-w tiina in chiMier..

3ELMMLD'S EXTRACT BT7CTU IS DrTJBETIC -CtD BLOOD PURIFYING, AND CURES ALL DISEASES ARISING FROM UJ3IT8 OFDISSIPATIC N AND EXCESSES JJJD IMPRUDENCE8 IN LIFE, IMPURITIES OF THE BDXID, l:TC, BUTERSE3r G COPAIBA IN AFFECTIONS FOR WIHCH Vr IS USED, AND EYPHIL::TIC AFFECTIONS !N THESE DISEASED USED IN CONNECTION WITH a:iLSII3CLD-S RO! J3 WASH. LADIES. nj MANY AFFE!TIONSPECTrjAB TO LADIES, THE EXTi t ACT BI CHUISUNEviUAJAED BY ANY OTHER REMEDY AS IN (.HT-OF 081 8 OR RETEST10N, IVIlEGULABITY, IAINFULSEBS OR SUPPRESSION OF CUSTOMARY EVACUATIONS, ULCERATED OR SCHIIJtUS STATE OF TO" UTEETIS, LEUt:011RHCEA OR W3ITES, STERILl T7, AND FOR ALL COMPLAIN'. S INCIIENT TO THE SEX, WHETHER ARISING FROM INDIS CltETION OR HABITS O.f DISSIPATION. IT IS PJtESRBIBED ESTENSIVELY BY THE MOST EMINENT PHYSICIANS AND MIDWIVE8 FOR EN-FEEBLBD AND DELICATE CONSTITUTIONS, OF BOTH SEXES AND ATX AOE8 (ATTENDED WITH ANY OF TUB ABOVE DliJSASESOR SYMP

TOMS.)

H. T. HELMBOLD'S KXTRACT BUCKU C0KE9D"8KASES ARISING Yl OM IMHiUDJtXCE8, HABITS OF DISSIPATION, ETC., in all their atagm, at litllef xpense, little orno chnngo ii: diet, iioincunveulence.aQctnoexptwure. It causirt i: frequcut doaire, and givra atrentb to Uriiu.t, tl:.preby removinft 01tnictitnn, IhevorjtiuR s.ii't C-iring Strictorea of the Urethra, Aliasing Pain nnd I.ifiammation. bo frequent to tbte claaa of dieaaiie, iiu-1 expe ling all PoUonoiui matter. Tuouiwands wbo have been the victims of incompef :i! cr-:ti( a:id who havo paid heavy foes to to ci red lit a short time, hive found they have bf-en :ltcelrecl. nod that the "Ptistm n oas ny the use of ";r))werl'a aHtringjnte," bn dried up in tho uylein, to break out In a maio aggravated form, ind ; rbapx after Mari'iapn, Vee HELMBOLO'H E3TP-A0T BTJCHTT for all A(fi:tionn and Ltasea of tht Urinury Organn, wlietlitr Qxinting in Jlaie or FemUc, from whatever ranee oriflinating, and no matter of how long flti.nrt;nn. PKICE,ONIiIOI-L.UtAN) FIFTY CEHTH 5;a BOTTLE.

HENRY T. HELMBOLD'S IltPBOVED ROSE WASH eaonot he mrpaaaod an a I' ACE WASH, anil will he fc und the onlv aixtcific reiaedv in every species of C1TTANE()US AFFECTION. It Epeedlly ormlii-att P'D?LE8,POTf , SCOR 3UTIC DRYNESS, INDUI .TI0N8 Of the UUTANBOUS MEMB.ANK, etr., dlipels REDNESS and INCIPIENT INFLAMMATION, HIVES, RA SH, MOTH PA TCHES, DIIYN ESS

t).tf w'AU OH Hh Jfl, JJII'JMI mill an purpttm for which SALVES or OI TMENTS are used; rt tor tho akin to a atahi of parity ana softnens, anil insorefl contitined bejJthy iction to the t:nmn of lta veuaela, on vhich dependfl the agreeable clearnfwi and vivacity of coi Icvion eo much sought and admired. Bu: howevi-r valuable oh b remedy fr Dilating ifectao!' tho ski:), H. T. Helrtiold'B Kok Wash has long eui:ta1ncd ita prlaclpal cSahn to nntxjunded patronags.by pfieneefiijjUmahtiee wblcli rendur it a TOILET APPENL AGE of the moFt Kuperlative and Cengeniilchara'ter, wmhinlng in an elegant formula those pronrnent ;-equiaitea, BAI-'EI Y andEFFICA TY the invariable accompnlmeiit of it use ail k orew rvative and It pfreaher of the C. -mSloxion. It & an eicellHit Loti in for dlaeaaea -t a 1)i-.lllie Nature, and a in inj soticn for diseases of te Urinary Organs, arising fr( m habita of dineiraWo, iwe-I In ejnneotlon with the EXTRACTS BCCHC. 8ARSAPARI1XA AN1 CATAWBA GRAPE PILLS, in such disease is reeommendi-d cannot bf nrpasaea. PBICE, ONKDOIiLASPEK BOTTLE,

PRINTING! THE PROGRESS Job Printing Office ! , Xfoxtli Side ublii Square, ! With AV c Tfpf. iVfic Presw, and mtirflv .Vc Mah fiai f all klndB, is irepared to do Printing in a etlo ttival t i Cio best in the country. Particular attention pai d to

CONiNIERClAL PRINTING.

Intfudin n Bill ireadu. Hand Bills, Letter HeadR, Noto I-ltMtis, Olmuais, CardpT Pn-tors. kc, I'ino printing a niwcialty. Orders from a distance will receive prompt attention.

ORCHARD HOUSE !

S. Til, Orchard & Sons, PROPRIETORS.

Heaven. Ueyoti'l thene flhilling winds anil gloomy skhs. Beyond death'n elondy portal. There in ;i liind where beruty navar dieA. At.d love becomes immcrtal. A land whoao l(tht b nevr dimmeit by shade, AVboae fields are ever vernal : Where nothinc Keiuitiful can ever fado. Ilut hlooinn for aye, eternal. We may not. know how sweet tl.c bKlmy air. How bright anil fair it flewerj -. We may not hear the rnnf that who there. Through thogo enchanted bowers. The eity's shining towers we may not see. With our dim CRrthly vision ; Fordeatb. the silent warden, keeps the key That opes those eaten olypian. Rut riomettiueH when adotvn the western fk' The fiery sur.flet linRern. It? golden enteii swing inward noiselessly. IJliloeaed by unseen fintrers. And while they stand . moinent hnlf ajar, U le.in?i from the inner elory Strrnm britihtly through the aiure rault a ar. And half reveal the story.

Opposite the Depot, Bloomington, Ind.

T& .Ye RUns vrill frs spared to nceommorae th4 traveling public. NATIONAL H O TE L!

L. IS. McKINNEY, PROPRIETOR, BL00M1NGT0N, IND EAST OF THE PUBLIC SQUARE.

This Hole isuv'go and coinmodionp, nr"t-claa in. all ita appointments, d.irally located, and. ia qniA and conifortablo. Charges moderate.

& CO,

GENERAL

Produce, Gommission

AND FORWARDING MERCHANTB.

Wholesale and Retail Grocers, And dealers In Nails, Kanhawa and Lake Salt, White Fish, &c, BLOOMING-TON. I N I. J. W. HARR7MAN DEALERS IN Choice Family (Jroceries tnen8n're and Xfotions. The b:.gheat price paid for country produce

ISortlu oat C orner of Public Square. I3LOOMINGTGN. - INDIANA.

Rest. Rest if not quitting The busy earct-t : Rest in the flittinc Of self to its spere. Tin the brook's motion Clour without fli rife ; Fleeting to oeenri After its life. Tis living and serving The Highest and Best : 'Tis onward, unswerving ! And that is true rest. intbf: CLIPT WIXJ8. Ttir ai;thor or "rideon's rock," Thu most trying thing about. Uncle T; 1 wan tlio resemblance to his brother. It w.is sufficiently flisagteeable to have an oUl man with tastes so low and habits no unjilenHjint fastened upon the family at ail ; but to sec, and to know all saw, in tlm person the Leffler feautures, and all the Leffler peculiarities to tho very finger-nailp. was ti miiifortune. which demanded the whole of that fortitude of tvhicli tho family motto boated. All attempts at reforming Uncle Ted had long siiif'C been abandoned. His brother, the doctor, had now grown accustomed to filenne the complaints of hia wife and children by half-reproach-lul reminders of that complete and final Telease which the whitening hair and battered frame eraed to prophecy was near at hand. No other comfort concerning the old man presented itself : and even this, tuggested by his appearance and sometimes rambling mind, was made f.iint av.'d dotibtfcl by his :ood appetite, long walkf, and early hours. Uncle Ted had for many years rubtnitted himself to abject dependence on his brother. lie could not work, he could not cope with strangeiB. Innumerable were the situ.itiona his brother had obtained for him. ami the wardrobes Mrs. Leffler with willing fingers had prepared, and the departures that Uncla Ted had made: but swift

had been the return on each occasion,

JHore Tight-rope Performers Needed. It is obvious that we do not hnrg enough people in this eoun'ry. As si missionary work alone, hanging should become more common and popular.

Nothing has ever been devised that win j pathetic the tale, irresistible the prayer be compared 10 it for efficacy in pro- j to be allowed to slay, moting piety on the part of the subject?, j The doctor continued his efforts ftom There was Buckhout, the perpetrator of j time lo time; but, finding them always the murders t Sleepy Hollow, New j followed by the same results, and findYork, and about as unconscionable a j ing also ths.t as the tall old form and liute and malefactor as the criminal noble looking, half-vacant face grew annals of the country can produc . If j more and more like his father's, it belie had keen limply reotonced to ten- ! csime more .tnd more difficult foi him prisonment for life there is reason to i to furo him from under hU roof. The appreher.d that he would not have been ! doctor, therefore, had settled in his

brought 1:0 any saving sense of the er

ror of hiii ways ; but just before he was hung, tho other day, he gave the smiling assurance that he bad repented and secured forgiveness. If juiies, and courts, and governors will not be moved to the infliction of hempen punishment by the demand? of justice or the safety of societ;;; h t ".hem take, into the ne count thi; spiritual welfare of the culprit, and bang him forwith. Chicago

Junes. Uses of the Sunflower. The cultivation of the sunflower is likely to become popular in India. An Indian authority says: Tho oil extracted from the seed i s iid to be superior to both almond and olive oil for "able use, and to be employed in manuliicturing woolen goo Js, oap, and cancies, as well as for lighting purposes. The leaves have, been tiiar.ufac' uied into cigais, having pectoral qualities, sind might perhap. be tound n:ore tdhcacious than stramonium. The blo:mis furnish si brilliant jellow dye, which stands well. Kach ;.cro will conts in from 15.0IKJ to 20,0lK)

plants, and the average quantity of seed

own mind and made the family aware

he should not again seek a situation for Uncle Ted unta he was compelled to to place him in that from which i-eturn is impossible. He was certainly a formidable incumbrance one whom it was impossible to conceal from society ns it was to expect society to receive. Though his peculiar habits rendered it necessary for him to be banished from the room on th-3 arrival of visitors, no one could be sure he would not come back for his snuffy pocket-handkerchief le ft on his niece's work-basket, or one of his enormous slippers dropped in his nrecipitr.te re

treat, and in seaich of which all the lnl.es would have to rise, and turn about, and look under their chairs, while the doctor and Mrs. Loftier stood 111 sick, smiling patience; and uncle bowed, and apologized, sind uttered most absurd complimenta. and made as his nieces afti-: wards would declare a " fcsii'f-jl exhibition' of himself. Uncle Ted was full of admiration for these nieces, but they were scarcely able to appreciate his high opinion of them, their beauty, elegance, anil ac

complishments, since he was in the

will be .'ill bushels, each of which will j ,!,lt r conrirfinn his nnininn In 11, p

give a Niton of oil. The quantity of : f()0,u, ;imi ti,o .ook, who were kept seed is n uch ncreased by dwarfing '.he ! ,vtji informed by him as to the con plants, he best manure for which n j qU(.3ts and matrimonial chances of aid to be oH mortar broken up. ' he liw voug hulie; and, indeed, s to plant, should be kept clean and tree nl05t ol- t,.,, family affairs, private or from weeds, and the quantity of seed ; otherwise, with which he might happen required is about six pounds per sicre. ; jo become acquainted.

It was no longer of any use trying to

keep him from talking to the servants.

I Who else could or would talk to him ? 'His brother had. done his utmost to

1 frighten and persuade him out of the ; habit, had insisted on each member of i 1 1 1 . : 1 .1 . : - . . ,

Our Aaieri;ran Kuloff was supposed to """, """""S " "our a nay to devote his leisure between murder to j h"' ,h.Hl '' t not be driven to this ,inmon.iroiie.ili!,i.4llh..mi.nl.n,. w ! extremity, but it wsis all of no use.

They shrail 1 iave sufficient interval be

tween them fsr exposure to the sun. as

under such circumstances they beet it: lunier and more fully stored with seed.

Full and eipU-it iirectlona aooompany tle mad) cljca. Eviden of th moat n-apon ble and reliable ona wter ftirnlahed on applicaUc n with JiundredB of Uiouaandu of livlig wltn sees, and np wd of 30,0 0 OiisoIlcltJ-.d certif. cataa at d ret ommead&torv lettia, many of which a; e from i.he b .gheat aonreea, lncludInq emipent Phynteian, Clergymen, Btateauen, eic. T!:ie proprietor b ia never rest rted to their puhliitinn l'i the ufiwHi apera: lie doos not do this from the

i f net that hia artli leu rank aa fitandard Proiaratl'!lB, ! and do not need u be pnjppal op by cnrtu.catiia. ' Henry T. Itelmbold's Oenniiie Twpara tic ns. DeJiver.jilto any address. Bocnrcfrom obnerrat on. , ESTABLISHED UPWARD OF TWESTT TEARH. ' Sold liv lrnggiala eyeryvhe c. Aifldreae lettere for information, in confidence, to HENRY '1'. HEjjMi X3 ')LO, Drtigsifit and (SiirniMt. Only Depots: H. T. HKLMiJOLD'SDragrad C3)em- ' ! l Wrehonae, So. 694 Br' -odway, New fork, ( r to i If. T. II KLMBOLD'H Mo lied Depot 104 SiiUth Tontb i 81 rent, it;lln'!(;lp!iia, Pa. ' iltWAKK 'IT CHTII'HT8. Aak f. HXJ1RT j T. HELMBOLI) 1 TAlii: V0 OTHEB.

sentett by the letter " U, anil tiiete is no knowing how complete he might have m ide hi. demonstration if tin- law had iml. cheeked his researches with ;t rope. But now comes an Ungiisb

writer, one Morgan Ksivar.rti.h. i.nd

?-eeks lo propjotc the letter ')' to that

dignity. He had published two large njiumes to (irove that "t ) ' was the first J letter ever pronounced by human lips, j ami in defer s of his theory he biings I forward such cogent consideration! j that, this le tter represent-! the disc of j the sun and the shaj e. of the human mouth when open. Iteally the mei6t ! impressive ii,.;gun.ent, so far as appears at present, is his defunt proclamation

of a Willingnes- to bet 1:00 on it, and leave it to a, committee tif referees consist ng of the ablest philologists in Eulope, iiuch us Max Muller, Lit tie, and Kenan. This presents to the scl o lasts the sporting dilemma, " Put up or shut up," and ie a happy device to brinj; the mooted questirms ef s-cience to the crucioal test of the prize-ring. The Hartford Ewnmg Put say : " A Cinaanrnin hung himself, and a jury of neighbors wis impanneleti in accordance with the r. -cuircments in the case. After mature de.li'ienition upon the evirleiue add'jceii, one of the number was tfcked what corieluaion he hud reached, when he franl; v icsiionded : 'O, there baint

l-.e,

was tiresome, ard failed to

his appointments. The voune

opie were full of their own cares and

pleasures, or rather of the pleasures which were thtir cares. The strong wings w.-itrie 1 trying te fly mi low a.s ibis maimed and degraded old eaple, so

i tin v lefi it. am: pursuer! their own i 1 riiJht flight. Uncle Ted, now, therefore, almost 1 unchidden canied his p.ip?rH down to the kitchen every morning, and re:ad i I siding articles to the r.ok, who withI out ceremony ordered hisii from place j to l ine.', to suit her convenience t while

the hem-emaid would peep over his shemider at the K 1 1 tisemeii ts, and the footman -it on t!ie table, discussinc

j politics with him, undi.sguise.eilv patronI izingly. j The. doctor eoultl do nothing but ! eigd lieljilesslv in tie, passing the j kitchen stairs tor a stroll in the garden, 1 heard that, fine old voice losing every j day something of its nobility of tone,

sind ill it pure accent becoming so uncertain smel vulgaii'.e;d. Yet it would have been well for the family hael Uncle Ted ennfinrd his friendship to his brother's servants' solely. This, how. vet, was not the case; for the eloctor bad more than once, surpri.-ed him,

iieloie iireaklast, suineling on the Btep, ! leaning against the area railings his i skull-cap on the back ef his bead, his t har.ds in the pockeU of his old dressing-

gown -iislting the mil k man s a Ivice on

uie leas, moatoi 01 tiouo. ... i....... u. mw(. ,Ioli U(, trinli!y inatu.tf hitherto the critter s guilt. j su.josed to have been a seciet from

Uncle 1 e;(l ri ini.se-II.

Ciioum. and desirable with fish, meats, soups, etc., is the famous Halfonl Table Sauno. l'ereons who make a single trial, woiuinr that they hnve never before used thia capital jiooiia. For sale by every grocer. Core.

Led gently away by his brother's trembling army, ariel stearnly, yet enneat ingly remonstrated with in the seclusion of the doctor's study, Uncle Ted defended his conduct on the score

of tho milkman's being a very remarkable man, gentlemin under a cloud, a persen of considerable mental eadownments; and the interview would be brought ,to an abrupt close bv an earnest recommendation from Uncle Ted that friend should be asked to dinner. Among. the nursemaids in the park no les-i than arr;ongt his brother's domestics Jtjdd tradespeople, Mr. Edward Leffler was incessantly eliscovering some " higly-gifted mind," or some "fine nature," Unit demandeel not only the devotion Of Ais morning hours, during which he would sit in speechless or eloquent luiiiration of the "minel" ir "nature' question, usually to the' embarra-ienf of Us owner, and of some po ji e,7ian or li egurdf Ui m near at ham' Vat,' tinforf inat.'iy, too often itmaided nVo heSue ge, in the liape of a silver thimble, brooch, or tibuori, pilfered from the toilet table of one of Uncle Ted's nieces. When the fsiniilv vi-ent out of town. Uncle led was left behind. To carry such a disgrace among fresh scenes and seivants was of course out of the question j yet the alternative was a serie.us one. In thct. it generally happened that, from th moment of the family's return to the rn nnent of its departure again, fresh revelatioi s were constantly being made eoneernin j Uncle Ted's peculiar mxles of passing this interval of separation from his relatives. At first when the elector, on opening one after another of his favorite books, ' found himself possessed by a strong inclination lo sneeze, and tracetl this strange effect to its cause nimply, a few grains of brown powder sullying neaily every page he concluded that Uncle Ted had been devoting his time exedusively to study during the family's absence. Sunelry odd volumes being missing from their j 'laces, ami undiscovffrable anywhere else, Uncle Ted's bed-room and favorite little retreats would be searched. An to the volumes themselves, the search would be in vain, but would result in he finding of mysterious little tickets bearing mention of the missing books send their whereabout n; and not o1' these aione, but bejiring mention abo of other liUle trifling sit tides : and ti eir whereabemts. Perhaps the whole amount which the exchange of the things mentioned on the tickets themselves had brought Uncle Teel would not be more than ten or twelve shillings. But the most alarming thought to the family was not, after all, the way by which the money hael been obtained, but the way in which it had been spent. Who could tell for what purpose it had gone? Perhaps in wooing to be Mrs. Edward Le ffler, Mr?. Woods, the tobacconist, a widow with six children, and a person for whom Uncle Ted had confessed feeling of no common friendship, through her likeness to a certain Lady Emily, bis first love ; or pei haps it had purchased ft betrothal gift for Mrs. Webfoe, the charwoman, whom the. nustor of thu house was ever in fear of having introduced :o him as his sister in-law. It cannot be supposed thct the discovery of these tickets oouhl he, passed over as ctvily as Uncle Ted's other little eccentricities. A sense of unavoidable but useless ehity cotnpelleeJ the doctor to summon his brother ;o his study, and endeavor to awaken in him some feelings of shame and penitence, but when, in obedience to his stern command, the tall form appeared, there was still so much of the old nobility about it that the doctor felt himself almost overcome with shame at the accusation he had to bring against him, and his voice would tremble, as, pointing to the tickets on the table, he would say " Well, Edward, so it lias come to this, has it. again I" Uncle Ted. though seited in an attitude as dignified as his brother's, woulel iraze on the tickets with the expression of a child being chidden fo::1 a broken toy. and wondering timidly whether the

tact of its being rendere-el use-less ought not to be considereii sufficient punishment, without further interference. .Sometimes when the doctor's words were more than usually stern and rousing, when his eloquence- over the family honor uume strongly, like the winel from mountain heights, to this poor fallen human eagle, rie was stirred, woulel ruffle his feathers, and struggle to sosir to where he had fallen from. His brother, pausing for want of breath, would naze upon him with some hope,

sis he saw the thin figure elraw itself

suddenly up, as it stun;, the long hand trembling and hurriedly stroking the long chin, the fine blue eyes kindling to something like horror us they rested on the tickets; but tbe very next instant, catching sight of his brother's relenting eye, Uncle Ted would forget everything but the fact that ho ws aboMt to be forgiven and set free, and tho doctor saw that he had seized upon that thought

with the joyous avidity of a child, though he still tried tC' keep the corners of his mouth eirawn down, and an affectation of remorse in his eyes during the rest of the lecture. When it was over, and the tloctor lookeel after his retreating form, trying to cover its relief by a greater show of infirmity than usual, he sighed to think how useless it seemeel e ven to point out to him a better state, since it was so impossible for him to reach it. Not only hael fate so cast him down, but had taken away all by which he might ever hope to 1 ise had dipt the wings which in this world could surely never grow again. The poor eagle might ruffle its feathers and struggle, but never soar. It did coitinue to struggle at times, even while its decadence, went on se rapidly, when, while reading his paper, the housemaid, in hen- anxiety to heal of a more eligible siti ation, so far forgot herself as fo lay her black-leadeel tingets on his shoulder; or when, in the heat of a political discus-ion, "he footman addressed him by an opprobriously familiar name ; er when the t:ook, after the failure of repeated hints as to the kitchen fire being needed lor other purposes than teiasting the sol of his slipper by, dropped the poker accidentally on his foot; on such occasions Uncle Ted was seen to change from his normal state. The half startled, meditative look would come suddenly into his eyes the long hand begin stroking the chit 1 with eiuick, agitated fingers, the figun elraw itself up, atnl make its retreat from the kitchen with 11 elignity that accorded but ludicrously with the set eif the ragged and pate lied Indian dressinggown, whicli had something of the character of the garments worn by monkeyR 011 barrel-organs. These Attempts at flight were very rare, and of brief duration. Before his friends in the kite hen had enjoyed his absence a quarter of an hour, Uncle Ted woulel prohally be again amongst them, assisting the offending housemaid to shell peas, helping John to spell out a love-letter from the country, or bow

ing a, cook's elbow with his newly-filled snu T-box, anel the request " Madame, eibleege me. I have deBirei Mrs. Woods to put in a little more rappee than Hcotcji on purpose to suit your taste. You trill obleege me?" The gravy or iiauco of such a day usually seemeel fo suggest thutco k had not spurned t he prayer, though it might have happened aha haii not sufficiently recovered her temper to utter her ac customed magnanimous reply of "Certainly, Mr. Eelward, sir." while her huge thumb and finger filled his tiny box whicli he held toward her, perfectly cone aling his dismay, not only .it so much of its contents being covcreel by the finger and thumb, but at to mudi more twing scattered around in their efforts to sqeeze themselves out of !he box again without losing -i grain of what they had secured. One day it was exceedingly desirable that Uncle Ted sk.ould be so disposed of sis to leave no danger of his intrusion at ti little dance to take place in honor of bis eldest niece's engagement. The task had l:en undertaken by Dr. Leffler at the tearful entreaties of his daughter, who, in consideration ot the high bir h and poetic temperament of her betrothed, implored that he might be spared the sight of Uncle Ted untiil a closer intimacy would allow of some explanation as to his condition. The queen of the evening was Uncle Toil's special favorite and the object of his most intense admiration. Ever since he had heard of the engagement he had been in a state of wild anxiety to see the perton for whom all those affairs of .'Sophy's, in which he had shown her i'uch lively though inconvenient syrapahy, had been brought to so sudden a. termination. But though TJncle Ted 1 us lied out into the area., and started up nvery time he. hnrd a e:nrriage stop sit the house, he had always as yet managed to miss ii carriage; though he had pa ;od the hall for half an hour when he

knew him to be in the house and on tbe point of his departure, be had been always been beguiled away before the moment came, nod listened at a distance to the buoyant step and voice in indignant disappointment. He did at last obtain t, sight of him through the keyhole, snd spent some lime there rushing elown every minute to confide to the servants his impressions of the biide(room elect from this narrow point of iew, then rushing back to it again, "heso impressions, unfortunately, were such sis to make him more eager than e ver for an introduction. Countless pieces of paper were found about the Louse, the beginning of letters presenting " Mr. Edwird Leffler's compliments to Captain Aldyse," and begging for an iateiview at Mr. Woods', or at some e ther of Uncle Tec's caoics resorts, at

ti:e captain's earliest e-onvenience. These notes sadly alarmed Sophy, who fjlt sure the writer w&j waiting his opj ortunity to throw one into the captain's carriage, or have it delivered to him in t ie house, or perhaps it would bo in h er own presence. All hiB efforts failing, Uncle Ted had of late begun to give way a little to despondency. This bad been brought on by s. severe cold he had caught through waiting half an hour in the area on a foggy evening just to see the captain's carriage-lamps Hash try. He had not bseu out for tho las t day or two, to the wonder ot several small pensioners of his to whom he made a daily allowance or" hard-bake out of tho little money with which the doctor ventured to trust h ,m fcr his snuff. He had passed most ol" his time in the kitchen, had been ri.ther more silent ''mopish," as cook expressed it and altogether less sociable than usual, mu.tering, when ae.ked what he would tako to eat, some gloomy illusion to a dry crust, and snappishly eiifer'.ng, when asked where he would sit, to go to the coal-hole, if his doing so would affortl anybody natisfaction. Dr. Leffler found him seated by tbe ti e, and his first glance at h'.u led him ti expect even more opposition to So-pay.-) wishes than tie had anticipated. " I'm sorry to hear your cold's worse, l-'dward," he said in a professional tone. " You must go to ked very early." To his surprise Uncle Ted answered immediately Yes, Theodore, I think I will go to bed early tonight." " I would, indeed, .Edward," urged 1 lie doctor. " I think I'll go now, Theodore," declared Uncie Ted, rising from his chair. "Well, 1 really would," agreed the Jootor, trying hard not to appeal- too much telieved. tie began to think, as he gave Uncle Ted his arm up the stairs, that he must hove forgotten alut the party altogether, but as he gave him over to John's a?e in the hall he wsis untlecoived in Ibis matter by Uncle Ted's observing quietly as he looked round at the cimelias and lights

" I should l:ke to nave seen Sophy

when s.he'a dressed." ' You shall do so," said the doctor. Sophy shall run up and see you, only you must not trouble her about anything. .She ia over-excited, as it ia ; you must not aeti to her excitement by troubling her in any way." " No, Theodore'," answered Uncle Ted meekly, sun! .fter one dazed, lingering look at th'i ligats and flowers, passed up the stairs with John. He kept his word, for when Kophy went up to his little room at the top of the house, John carrying two candles before her. anel her maid keeping her elress from touching the floor, Uncle Ted only raiseei himself on his elbow and gazed at her fid the tears cameinto his eyes, then lie lay down again, saying gently " Thank you, Sophy ; I am much obleeged to you, 'Sophy. I havn't excited you, have I, f-kiphy ? Tell your father i haven't excited you, my darling.'' Cook hud promised, to Bend him up some gruel, but forgot all about it, and he lay in the dark listening to the music, thinking of his darling, all loveliness and love, floating among the lights and flowers, and of the bright young conquerer whom he was not allowed to see. After ly-ng to a long time, he heard John boumiing up stairs to take a peep at himself before attending at supper. Uncle Ted called to him, but he tripped down agJim, calling back carelessly " Can't s'op now Mr. Uedward. Just agoing into supper. Lie down anel keep warm naw or we shall be 8-havin' hrunkeetiti net in. Bo up directly. Haw rewora " It was f.bout half an hour past midnight when John whispered something to Dr. Leffler that caused him to go out of the room, ard go straight up to Uncle Ted's attic. The doctor Hit down upon the edge of his brother's bad, scarcely knowing for a moment or two what it was which had

bo shaken him his sudden ascent of he stairs, the sight nf Unele Ted's f. oa, or the weak cry with which he had greeted him. " Theodore, I will see him I've a right to see him." " Be quiet, Edward ; you shall sea whom you like ; but don't excite ycu:-. self. What is the matter? Have you been alone long?" The quiet, authoritative, professiontj tone and manner had some effisct. Uncle Ted became a little calmer. The doctor gve John some elireetions, sent him down stairs, made aa alteration in the arrangements of the pillows, then Bat down again and felt his brother's pulse. "Theodore." " Don't talk Edward ; don't talk juat

now, said the doctor; "presently fill

"No it won't, Theodore. Iwant lo

tell you something." "Well, if it will relieve you. But fou must be very quiet." "Theodore, the night father died you know I was alone, taking can of the house me and Mrs. Webfoe I was out when they brought him home j in the fit : I was taking a cup of tei at a friend's excellent woman, Theocoire perfect lady, though reduced to a 1 mangle." " Don't excite yourself, Edward pruy ," said the doctor, beginning to have appalling forebodings as to the actual existence, after all, of the long-dreaded sif ter-in-law. " Well ? " " We had (Kniversed on the subjeot of your quarrel with poor father, and she joked me about being likely to have trill if he should die before you made it up, and said that people did. say he bud a will made in my favor. Then f hey fetched me, Theodore Mrs. Webfoe came in a cab for me." " Now you art. exciting yourself, Edward." "Theodore, he rtMhave a will, lea ring all to me ; he put into my own hands this this " " Be quiet ; pray be quiet," said tSe doctor, half dreamily, keeping one of his brother's hands as he took the tiling they thrust into his. He was almost startled out of Ids usual inscrutable pulse feeling expression. How great and sudden a chsinge must have come to the poor weak isolated mind all unnoticed for sue a an idea to have found place and conviction in it I At that moment a recollection of his brother's manner when he had returned home after bis father's suddeath, caused the doctor to think over the words he had just heard in an entirely different spirit. After sitting looking into his face a

minute, he got up slowly and wert to the candle with the paper Uncle Ted had given him. There was nomistakicg it for the very same whose repcrted existence twelve years ago had filled his heart with misgiving and bitter aosa. "What made you do this, Edwird? How could you receive me as owner of all, tnd remain yourself almost God forgive me I almost penniless? How could you, Edward?" " Was I fit to be anything but nlnost penniless, Theodore?" " But why not have told me hare shared it with me equally ?'' asked the doctor, with almost pastionate reproach. Uncle Ted sighed and shook his head. " Ask your own spirit "he said "sperit,:" in imitation of cook 'wk your own spirit, Theodore. You "know lis well as 1 do, you would almost have cursed your poor father, Theodore you know you would and let tdut children starve, rather than let ihem touch a penny of his money so left. Ah, knew you, Theodore I knew yo i. I knew it must be all or nothing. I says to myself, What am I ? I only want; to see the children happy, and find a home amongst 'em. And I have found a home, and been a turrable trial to you, Theodore ; but it won't be long I feel it won't be for long, Theodore." The doctor sat with his face buiixl in his hands. The story had not startled him. He knew that such an act was

natural to Uncle Ted. There hac. not been the slightest heroism about it ; it had been his easiest course, and therefore the one most pleasant to him. " But, Theodore, you wouldn't always let me see you happy, Sophy wen't let me see her happy ; she won't let me see young Al lyce. It's too bad, this is, Theodore."' " I will fetch them," said the dsstor huskily ; " they shall both come up." " Stop, Theodore," cried Uncle Ted, with a vehemence that left him breathless. When the tloctor reached the bedide, he had turned his cheek to the pii".ow, and closed his eyes. ' Don't call 'em." he said faintiy. " I like to hear tbe music, and to think they're happy. Don't make 'em eaye off' for me. I'd rather not see Aim now.

I won't have her made to leavj off dancing, and set a crying with her happy eyes. Not to-night, Theodore. Let her dance; let her be happy. Bless her ! " After watching him some little i.ime, Dr. Leffler ventured to disobey the Pinaster of the house so far as to summon his relatives and Captain Aldyce to his bedside. Uncle Ted was so favorably impressed by Sophy's choice, that he left him a verbal introduction to carry to his special friend the policeman, lodging at Mrs. Woods's, whose acquaintaneas he strongly advised thecaptain to cultivate. He passed away at seven o" clone in the mornhii!. in the presence of all he

loved, r.nd looked on by a landing; full of honestly-regretful eyes. The Indian dressing-gown wat bequeathed to Captain Aldyce, and now serves as a nursery divan, the I light colors of which baby hands pat sooringly. The slippers were left to cook, their owner having observed, he ;said, that she had a Cleopatra foot. The snuff-box had so many claimants that the doctor, to settle the matter, decided to retain it in his own possession. A Drunken Brute Allows Ms Heroes .to Starve. A saloon-keeper of Galva, 111., named James Holmes, got on a continuous drunk, in which alcoholic bliss L'J re mained for ten days, and left his iam cf horses standing in the stable without any attention during that time. Cue of the poor creatures died from stai v:ition; the other was found alive. The fa dishing brutes had eaten their mangers, the manes and tuils of each other, ar.c even t1ir excrements. Taerewas plei.ty of feed in the stable, but no kindly hand to deal it out. Much indignation was felt when the case of cruelty be:ame known, and a feeling was expressed to deal with the drunkard summarilr, but tho lawless disposition was satisfied upon the arraignment of the bra a before Justice Shurtliff, and a tine ci' $50 being imposed Upon Lira.

WiM aad OUMrivsttB. , Air attached couphy oy ster-ahells. Epitaph on a wtiw : " Ha is gone; he could wait no longer." You may always recognize a champagne maker 6y hu fizz. WnEK a kettle just begins to boil is ita music that of a dull simmer. War is s pocket-handkichief like a snake ? Because it belongs to a generation ol wipers. A man that boards his riches and eajoys them not, is like an ass that carries gold, and eats thistles. A mxkbeb of the House, specking of a fortunate fellow-member, remarked a day or two since : " I'd rather have his luck than a license to tueal." Betton Journal. " What is your conaolt tion between life and deiath?' sskei a Sundayschool teacher of a young lady in the Bible clas, who blushed, sDd aaid: " I'd rather be excuied f om speaking

his name."

A witt in Zanesville. hio. who ha

buried three wives, has their photo-ri-!Lnha in ft mn. within 'which his

evn ninttnm iathe central fieure. and

underneath is this teaching inscription:

" The iiord wiu provide.

X vitr t n. mm-n-mee-sini; ant West

boasted that he had been manied twen

ty-five yeare, during whic'i he had never given his wife a cros word or look. Ha omitted to tell his hearere that he dared not to do the one or the ether.

No kan's spirits were ever hurt by

doing his duty ; on the contrary, one

and overcome, one menu je-ot -or interest purely for conscience sake, will . - . . . - -1

prove a corcuai icr weajr. ana iow apu-iso far beyond what either indalgenoe ar diversion can do for them.

God has written on Uie flowers that

sweeten the air ; on the breese that

rocks the flower ; upon uie rain-drop

that refreshes the sprig of moss that

lifts its head in the desert ; upon every

penciled shell that sleepa m tbo cavev

of uie deep, no less than upon the

mighty sun wat warmn and cheers millions of creatures which live in lta light upon all his works he hac writtn. Nnna liveth for himself."

A. Fish Story.

The last fish story comes from New

Jersev. Lately in the interior of that

State a mild-looking countryman entered a railway car, bearing a bundle tied up in a handkerchief, which he . . ,. . ... . a r: . .

placed under tne seat at uie ena or ue

car. Alter traveling aiong ior annt half an hour, a lady sitting in front of the countryman was observed to move uneasily on her seat, and to cast savage glanoes at a seemingly respectable man sitting by her side. In a few minutes another lady, still further in frost,

"became uneasy," ana at last, rising in her seat, requested some gentleman to protect hei from an elderly looking gentleman by her side; and who, she stated, had insulted her. A dozen persons offered their (tnstance, and before the accused oould apeak in his own defense his ha was jammed down over his eyes, and he was dragged to the rear f the oar. While there, and carrying on with ihe aveneers a

war of words as to wnat uie indignity meant still another lidy rose, also

fteated farther up t" s cir, snd accused

a gentleman sitting Den ma ner wiin improper conduct. A msh was made for insulter number two, but this gentleman vigorously defended himself with a large walking stick he happened to hAve and which, by Uie way, was one cause of the last trouble, bis accuser stating that he had indesooroasly been nipping her ankles under the seat with the same) and while -Jae struggle to gut at him was still in progress, somebody in front of the car shouted, "There's a snake on the floor !' A scene then ensued. The ladies in the car clambered up on the arms and backs of the' seats. One elderly lady managed to stand on the backs of two seats in tbe best circus manner possible under ta oireumstances, while a young mother threw her baby into a parcel rack, and than hung convulsively to a ventilator. The confusion awoke the countryman who, on being told of the snake, first felt in bis bundle, and then eicl aimed, " I'm blamed if that old eel heint got loose," and started for the front, soon returning, grasping firmly an immense eel, which he hsd caught out fishing, but which, when brought into the oar, had managed to get out of the bundle and had wended his way to the front, lovingly caressing the different varieties of ladies' gaiters which he encountered on the way. Apologies giv sa and reoeived straightened everything in that car but -the bat that was jammed down, and the countryman leavixg at the next

station no Mood was amwn. A Celestial Kite-Iyer. The extreme spiritualistic circles of New York city are agitated over the sudden appearance of Benjamin Franklin in their midst. The philosopher does not bear a strong resemblance to his lately-built statue, inasmuch as be has returned to earth in tne Kuiseof a cadaverous woman, who ctvw hersnjf Uie " Celestial Kite-Flyer." TAo tlurifty" spirit within her has revealed the faot that she must make, and tell for $1 each, precisely 9,999,999 magnetic kiios. She is, conaeqaenuy, busily engaged in making them. They resemble the ordinary plaything, and are supposed not to become endowed with '.heir wonderful virtue until the wholi number have been sold. When this happy consummation has been arrivod at, the nine million nine hundred and rinety-nine thousand nine hundred and ninety-nine owners are to meet and fly their kites. When they reach the rquisite height, their macnetiBOi will beom apparent. The luckless spirits w"io, according to Franklin, are floating around in space, will be attracted and held fast. At a given signal, the kites will be hauled down, the kite-fly era wilt grab tho spirits thereunto attachetl, ar d in some unknown way hold them, and they, onoe brought to earth, will regenerate it forthwith. The scheme is a promiiiing one, and the only thing lacking is sufllcient faith to furnish the cash. The cni;.,iuea nf Mnw York do not think

it right to monopolize that priv'Uge, i . i i i - i s : : :...! A .i,.m

ana me wuvie wurm m iuvium w it with them.

Terrible Double Kwier. CutcnwATi, Feb. 20 A special to the Chrtmici says: "A horrible tragedy ..ma in Halt. rlv this uufftaisi! in

Clark county, two railea above New Al

bany, lnd. A log ncuee in wmoa a German named Bent ley resided was found burned to the gtound, the debris having fallen into the cellar. The raen who made the discovery secured a hook and fished out of the cellar the legs and arms of Bentley and his wife, also the skull of Bentley. It is supposed they were murdered for iheir money (as Bentley sold a larg lo- of bacon yesterday), and then the home was burned to cover the crime. The Coun ty Coroner and a large nutnbe:rof people from New Albany and Joffersonvitle went to the scene to-day, and Die oase is now bain, investigated. A youno lady in Indianapolis, whose married sister slue era', took plaoe last week, excused heiself from attending the solemn obsequi ss by spying that her own wedding was t tate pi see in the evening, and it would incapacitate her for the oocasaon ; bevies, she had no time to spare.