Bloomington Post, Volume 3, Number 21, Bloomington, Monroe County, 29 June 1838 — Page 4
I'OF.TRY.
From the Madisonian . PORT FOLIO OF INFERIOR RECOLLECTIONS. There is really so much truth and nature, as well as rhyme and reason, the following descant upon the diplomacy of the home department, that we cannot withhold from it our unouallified ictfTof approbation. A LAY OF REAL LIFE. "Some arc born with a golden spoon in their mouths, and some with a golden ladle. Goldsmith. "Some are born with tin rings in their noses, and some with silver onesy--Silrersmith. Who ruined me ere I was born, Sold every acre, grass, or corn, And left tho next heir all forlorn? My Grandfather. Who said my mother was no nurse, And physicked me, and mado me worse, Till infancy became a curse? My Grandmother. Who left me in the seventh year, A comfort to my mother dear, And Mr. Pope, the overseer? My Father. Who let mo starve, to buy her gin, Till all my bones came through my skin, Then called me "ugly little sin? My Mother. Who said my mother was a Turk, And look me home and made me work, And managed half my meals toshurk? My Aunt. W ho '.if earthly things would boast, "lie hated other's hrats the most,1 And theforu made mo feel my post i My Uncle.
Who got in scrapes, nn endless score, Ami always laid them at my door, Till many a bitter pang I bore J My Cousin. Who took me home when mothcrdied, Again with father to reside, lack sluics, clean knives, run far and wide? My Stepmother. Who marred my stealthy urchin joys, And w hen I played, cried "What a noise ?" Girls always hector over boys? My Sister. Who used to share w hat was mine, Or took it all, did he incline, 'Cause he was eight and I was nine? My Brother. Who stroked my head, and said "Gixid lad,'' And gave mo sixpence, "all he had,' l!ut at the stall the coin was bad? My Godfather. Who gratis, shared my social glass, lint v hen misfortune came to pas, Kofei led me to the pump? Alas! My Friend. Through nil this weary world, in brief, Whoever sympathised with grief, Or shared my joy my sole relief? Myself
the laws of the Wildcat country, the Bank Commissioner was appointed to make his periodical round, to examine into the concerns of the Monsters throughout the State; and that, if there was a man in the world of whom the Cashier of our wooden chest Bank stood in mortal fear, it was this same Bank Commissioner. It is not to be wondered at then, that when the officer of the bank saw the approach of the aforesaid gentlemen, who, by the way, were a couple of New York merchants, with about twelve hundred dollars of the said cedar shingle
bills, his imagination conjured up divers 'figures of
stern public lunctionaries, who had come to rummage up his wooden safe, ransack his cash account, and put his memory under the torturing pressure of a corporeal oath, for the security of the public, and the satisfaction of the wood cut bill holders. It is not to be wondered at, that w ith glassy eye and drooping nether jaw, he bade the gentlemen enter, while his limbs trembled and his words rattled in his throat, his mind all the time on the rack with pictures'of sunken credit, newspaper paragraphs, the loss of wooden chest, and worse than all, the loss of office private property pledged and gone, bills in chancery, and cedar shingles blown sky high. "We are not ready to make our report, gentlemen !' gasped the cashier. "Oh! ah! hard times, eh?" said the New Yorkers, taking the hint, "Well, never mind, be pretty easy new institution growing country want a little accommodation ourselves," said the spokesman, placing the thumb of his rirht hand against the side of his nose, and waving the fingers gracefully in the circumbient atmosphere. "You understand, eh?'1 The countenance of the Cashier brightened up, and he gave the imitation commissioner a knowing wink out of the corner of his left eye. Ah! you get my meaning. Well, make out your ow n report you know what'll suit, we'll sign it all right, you know take a large discount of you in a few days-by the way, wo've got a little of your paper that we should like to draw the specie for! you don't want it you know." I
All right, said the banker, relaxing his countenance into a broad grin "always ready to do the fair thing bv our friends you know."
The report was made, the paper presented and
paid, and tho functionaries parted, the best mends in the world. On the next day, the real Commissioner presented himself to the eyes of the astonished keeper of wooden conveniency. He opened the vault, and searched thcIepository of the specie & secic funds, the enormous and unparalleled suin of fifteen Millars. Maumcc F.rjircss.
3. Suffer him to rove where he pleases on the Sabbath. . 4. Give him free access to wicked companions. 5. Call him to no account for his evenings. 6. Furnish him with no stated employment. Pursue either one of these ways, & you will experience a most marvelous deliverance, or you will have to mourn over a debased and ruined child! Thousands have realized the sad result, and have gone mourning to the grave. A good retort. Lync Stephens was wending his way, a short time ago, through some narrow passage, when he met a pretty modest girl. "Pray, my dear," said he, "what do you call this passage ?" "Balaam's passage , replied the girl. "Ah, then, continued the pupy, 1 am like Balaam stopped by nn angel." "And I," rejoined ibe giil,as he pushed past him, "am like the angel; stopped by an ass?" Life is like a field of blackberry and rasplerry bushes. Mean people squat down and pick the fruit, no matter how they black their fingers; while Genius, prnud and perpendicular, strides fiercely on, .vgets nothing but scratches and holds torn in his trowscrs.
Small Talk. Poor baby w ant'? to turn to muzzy, turn 'Parley, nnd div muzzy a bull, d;ts a good tiid.
Tiie Latest American. A gentleman who had occasion to go to his wine celler, li. a candle for that porpose, and walked down his own throat. He did not discover his error till the candle was blown out by the wind on his stomache.
We have a thousand evidences on record,that if a seed of wheat is steeped twelve hours in a strong brine, and then mixed with fresh, caustic powdered limb before it is sown the crop will not be smuttv.
Latest Eastern fashions just received. A2ILA.HAIW FU2TK, IN THE XEW FRAME BtlLDIVO OPIOSITE THE MESSES. orchaed's IXX, Is now prepared to execute work of all kinds in his line, in the most fashionable and durable manner. From his long experience in the business ho has no hesitancy in savin; ho will be able to give genera satisfaction to those who may favor him with their
custom. Jle returns tu.s thanks to his old customers
and solicits
liliiDinina
its a continuation of their patronage. "iffon, Jr. 17, 11537. 1-otf
Taken up
fY Israel Miillenax, in Washington township, Prow n county, Indiana; on the 12th of May
I!::":, one orre M.-tre, supposed to be 4 years old, risin; !." h.m-N .'ii-!i,a .small star in her forehead; no other marks or brands perceivable; appraised to
;.5,ou l.y YoungGuthcry am! Samuel Marshall, before :ne this Z ith of May IJIJ.'J.
. ! I do certify this lo be a true certiicife from my To nr. Let. A young lady who had leen insulted j estray Uik. JOHN (,'. MA 11. SHALL, J. P.
by an old maid, placarded tHo following lino on her ,
liSlOUIlAUhMLST Ol- iiUhllATLIih. I ell n:ilir-IM.:il clubbing twenty cents each for one Newspaper.
doors and w indows:
To bo let or be sold, for the term of her life, Elizabeth Hall, by the way of a wife, She's old and she's ugly, ill-natured"and thin, For further particulars, inquire within.
I
ADMINISTRATOR'S NOTICE.
have administered on the estate of William Florer
latent Mouroecotnuy, Indiana, deceased. Those
i who owe the -tate must make immediate payment, those bav in claims, will present them according to I law, the estati; is insolvent.
DAVID EAKROW, Jldm'r. 3W'i, IS3JI. 17 3w.
How vain is the pride of ancestry ! We arc all j descended from one parent, and that parent was a:
working garducr. j AOMINl.STRATOIi'S NO'FICE.
j "VTOTIfi: is herei.y giien that I have taken from A late English paper tells a droll story of a fox , the I'm! o:e Court of Monroe county, Indiana, that was some years ago kept at an imi in Shrews-: letters of administration on the estate of Henry Pabury, and employed in n wheel to turn the Jack. Af-; ker, late ot said county dec d. All persons having ter a while Ueynard, getting wearry of sin employ- claims ujh inst ihe estate are requested to present, mcnt so unsiiitcd to his. Tcnius and habits, "avo his : ibem legally authenticated for Mttlenient, and all
L-no..r H,n ii nnd.m, ..re r.-r-i , m d hi M.nive '. in indebted to the same are requested to make
fields, where lie had not remained manvdavs In; fore
to be
he was pursued by the hounds; but running into the town, he sprang over a half-door which opened into the kitchen, juniMHl into his old w heel, resumed his former occupation, and thus saved his'lil'c!
A storm at ska. IJeforc I went on board I had Tfir TM.rvTV,IV xiiv Trv IN.rIIKS !:i,p
said that I should like to witness a storm as fierce UVc'have seen tho Mail Wa y Hill .received at our
as wo could escape Iron, without latal .tamage. j ,,ost ()r (;i,Ci Canto i;ra,iford county, Pennhome passenger repeated tins wish of mine (very ,vani w ,m:l is eadorsed "Snow fell here this common .persons going to sea for tho i.rst tunc) j ,noril;nrT ,otl,e depth often inches" This mav ac-
m inoncarmg oi ino mate, w no loiuinc sauors; wno, . r" .,. r..,lliri.i1i rnld wether, wo have
had for tho season.
Messenger.
accordingly were overheard saying one afternoon.
that I had better come on deck and see w hat 1 should sec. My clerical friend took the hint, and called mo hastily to observe the crew make ready for a squall, I ran up, and perceived the black line advancing over the water from tho horizon, tho remakable indication of a comine souall. The sail-
ors were running up the shrouds to get the sails in. j, , u? wi(h Ex,.hnn0 was nn The i second mate was aloft, in the post of danger, ; robbcrrVi iat can 1h; sni(, no ,onr. i.;x,.,anUe on
us .ong nair streaming m inc winu, wnu c w ,ui us v w York is now 0 nerccnt. It U "robberv."
those indebted to the same are requested to immediate payment. The est-te is supposed
solvent. A PSA I.OM PA K E R , . 1 dm V. June C.rlt, m.J.T. 1" 3v. CASH! CASH!! CASH!!! ALL those who are indebted to the undersigned, for services rendered in his office, will please save me the trouble of sending the sheriff with a fee-bill, which will In: the case after the .'50th dav of June next, as longer indulgence will be out of the question. Those w lio do not take this for a hint, shall have the next from E. I!!air, S. M. C.
"Dem two hoses look very much like, Sam," said) a sou of Afi ica to ono of his own color, the other I
day. "Yes, ly, particu'ly do one dis way.'
Miy 10i. IV.31
J. II. KINO,
M.C. 3w
lilouminilon, June 17, lo38. FOll THE I'OST. Mr. FAilor: -Viewing your paper a a medium of information to all classes of community, by which vices and follies may bo exposed. 1 feel constrained to unburthen my mind to you upon a subject, w hich may appear ridiculous to some, but is of interest to myself and, perhaps, to others. Tho modesty, natural lo my sex, forbids my remarking about uny thing, which is improper, openly, and therefore, I hope the young gentlemen of this placo will excuse me for taking this method of teaching
tlicm manners. 1 speak ol tho practice of assembling of Sundays at the doors of churches (for the purpose of talking politics, I suppose,) where they continue during 'service,1 staring in the faces of those who go there to worship. This, I would infotm them, is very ungeutlenianly, at least, it always appeared so to your humble servant. lam c I... .1. i:i. I.,, .....! t
when passing by them, have quickened my steps or tremendous.
averted my tace. lut it scans that they can take no hints; they are determined to 'sec and bo seen.' I will appeal to the gentlemen's own interest; a cord which is seldom struck in vain. They consider it their interest to ingratiate themselves into our favor. Hut, if they 'wish to gain the ladies hearts,' I would advise diem to pay a stricter attention to decorum. They certainly can lose nothing by being more courteous. If they are wanting in respect, we have our revenge. So, Mr. Editor, the consequences fall on their own heads. Let them remember the maxim, that "manners make the man." (I would say, make (i. c. constitute) the gentleman.) MODESTIA.
A GOOD ONE. Is this tho Hank, sir, tho Shi wishy-washy ? Exactly sir, this is the Hank. Walk in, gentlemen. The sttangers entered. It was the low second story of a one and half story wooden house. A largo wooden chest stood in the centre of the dreary apartment, which served the multifarious duties ol first, thejvaults of the Monstcr, where, deeply incarcerated under lock and key, was kept the metalic basis of the monetary institution second, the counter, where all the various and extensive concerns of the institution are carried on; where the bills neatly done by a first rate native artist, on a cedar shingle, are first issued forth to an admiring world, and again redeemed thirdly, a seat by day, and a couch by night, for the Cashier. It will be recollected that the time had arrived when, according to
below all was calm, i he sails were got in just in time. Tho captain did not como dow n to dinner. Orders were given to "splice the main-brace;" for the crew had been handling the ropes since four in the morning. I saw them come to their grog, nnd then wait for what might happen next. By sunset the sky was tremendous; the sea rising, the wind moving and whistling strangely. When I staggered to the stern to bid tho sea good night according to custom, tho waters were splendidly luminous. Floods of blue fires were dashcil abroad from our bows, ami beyond, tho wholo expanse sparkled as with diamonds. All night tho noises would have banished sleep, if we could have lain quiet. There was a roar of wind; the waves dashed against the
sides of the ship, as if they were bursting in; water
poured into our cabin though tho sky light was fastened down. Tho stato of our cabin was intoler
able; the crashing of glass, the complaining voices
of the sick ladies, the creaking and straining of tho
ship, and, above all, the want ol air, while the winds were roaring over head. I saw no necessity for
bearing all this, so, sick as I was, 1 put my clothes on, swathed myself in one cloak, and carried up a.iothcr wherewith to lash myself to something on deck. There, all was so glorious that I immediately stumbled down again to implore the other ladies to come up and bo refreshed; but no one would listen to me. They were too ill. I got the captain's
leave to lastcn myself to tho post of the binnacle,
promising to give no trouble, and thcro I saw the wholo of the never to be forgotten scene. Wo were lying in tho trough of the sea, and the rolling was
1 he captain wished to wear round,
and put out a sail, which, though quite new, was in
stantly split to ribbands; so that we had to make ourselves contented where wo were. The scene was pel fectly unliko what 1 hail imagined. The sea was no more like water than it was like land or sky. When I had heard of the ocean running mountains high, I thought it a mero hyperbolical expression. Hut here the scene was of huge wandering mountains, wandering as if to find a resting place, with dreary leaden vales between. The sky seemed narrowed to a mero slip overhead, and a long-drawn extent of leaden waters seemed to measure a thousand miles; and these were created by most exquisite shades of blue and green where the foam was ubout to break. The heaves seemed rocking their masses of torn clouds, keeping time with the billows to the solemn music of tho winds, the most swelling and mournful music I ever listened to. The delight of the hour I shall not forget, it was the only new scene I had ever beheld that 1 had totally and unsuspectingly failed to imagine. Miss Martineau.
I'rcniicc.
THE STATE OF INDIANA, Prown county.
ProLarc Court of Prown county, Feb. '
(O.i complaint J Jiiso.'u nrij.) Manner rrummct administrator, Esther Prunimet administratrix of the estate of James Prummet dee'd. r.. the creditors of the said James Prummet.
r'W'MIK Said administrators Iminc filed ttipir mpmn-
A man lived in a house between two blacksmiths, ' JL rial i:i this court, showins the condition of the
and was disturbed by the noiso they made. They i said eatale am! complaining that the property both at last promised to remove, on cogditioti that he; real and personal is insiiliicient to pay the debts and should give them an excellent dinner, which he' demands out Handing against it, ibe whole estate as readily agreed todo. When the promised feast was j sl,own '' 'mA fnwmton is $29,6 cents it
ended, he asked them whither they intended to j ".ere.o,, ;' "J-"- cu"
transfer their domiciles.
"Why," said one of them, "my companion remove to my house, and I to his."
will
A fight took place on the 27lh ult, in Fox street, Albany, between two free negroes named George Thompson and John Jackson, w hich resulted in Jackson receiving a blow with a stake from the other which caused his death. When Thompson had leveled his antagonist to tho ground, and done his work, he remarked, says the Albany Evening
Journal. "I have killed one nigger, and there lays j
another.
the said amount of 9,64, tho whole amount of said.
J estate of James Prummet Deceased le set &c decreed j to the widow of the said decedent. It is further orj deredthat public notice be given for three weeks
successively in the "lloonungton lost, a weekly paper published in Plooinington in Monroe county Indiana, of the said decrees. JOHN FLO I'D, Clerk. February 1 9 1 U3.1. 1 4 3 w
TAKKN UP
A gentleman delivering an oration in favor of "women, dear women'," ended it with these words. "Oh sir, nothing heats a good wife!" "I beg pardon," said ono of the company, " had husband does."
A sccKER. A man in Monroe, Highland co., Ohio, the other day sucked five dozen and eight eggs in less than ten minutes for a wager sf a shilling. The paragraph stating this, is headed "hard to beat." If the man was well beaten he would be made a custard of.
Stop the ball! 5000 reward will be given to any person that will stop the whig ball, w hich is i i t t
now roiling lorwaru, witn increasing veiocuy. inquire at tho Argus office, Portland, or of Martin
Van Durcn, Washington. Portland Adv.
A BUSTEit. ' Landlord," said Jonathan the other
day, stepping up to the bar of a public house, "jist give us a cent's worth of old New England, and put it in two tumblers. Here Jim, take hold, Til pay;
d n tho expenses,! say, when a fellow bust!"
is on a
A sailor's wedding. A tar just returned from sea, met one of his female acquaintances. He was so overjoyed that he was determined to marry her; but, at tho altar the parson demurred, as there was not cash enough between them to pay the fees: upon which Jack offered a few shillings; saying, "never mind, brother, marry us as far as it tciZo.'"
How to ruin a son. 1. Let him have his own way. 2. Allow him free use of money.
A Spirited Girl. A Lowell manufacturer recently wished to reduce the wages of the factory girls. Oneof them addressed him thus: 'Do you suppose that I would go to work again in that room, at lower prices than I have received before?" It is no more than fair, under the circumstances.' 'Well, all I have to say is that before Til do it 1 will see you in Topket,pumjnng thunder at three cents a week!"1 The manufacturer had to "knock under," and our hero in peticoats went to work at the old prices. The following is given in Bell's Life as a satire on the recent paragraphs in American papers on Absence of Mind :
Y Simpson Howard, living in Perry township, 3 Monree county, Indiana, on the 10th day of
April 1833, an estray dark bay mare, supposed tobe eleven or twelve years old, some saddle marks on her back, some white on her right hind foot, a small star in the forehead, supposed to have been burned: in the lower jaw for the big head ; the right shoulder considerably larger than the left supposed to be the big shoulder coming nn; no other brands or marks, perceivable; appraised to 20, by Joseph Hobson & Mansfield Hennett. 1 do hereby certify that the above is a true copy from myestrav book. J.MITCHELL, J. P. 14 3w JMiilinery Business. .Hiss ,lmcUa ll'Donaltl, WOULD inform the Ladies of Dloomington, and its vicinity, that she has commenced the above business, in the house recently occupied by J. S. Jones as a residence and Silver Smith Shop. All kiu'ds of work in her line will be done in a neat and fashionable manner, on short notice. JC7The latest Louisville fashions will shortly be received. Bloominglon, May 2d, 1033. Rawand's Tonic Mixture, or Vegetable FEBKEFUGE. V A specific and lasting cure for the Fever and Ague. DR. SNOW'S SPECIFIC FOR TIIE RHEUMATISM Lightning Tooth Ichc If r ops. French Itch Ointment, and nerve and bone Lina-
ment, just received and for sale by
G. H. JOHNSTON.
Eloomington, July 10th, 1837,
34-tf
Couuty Library. IN consequence of the destruction by fire of all the papers belonging to the county Library, it is absolutely necessary that those indebted, should come forward immediately and renew their notes. If this notice is not complied with, suit will be instituted against ).- defaulters. C. G.BALLARD, Treasurer C. I Feb.2? t a , 1838. l?-3