Banner Graphic, Volume 21, Number 89, Greencastle, Putnam County, 17 December 1990 — Page 4
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THE BANNERGRAPHIC December 17,1990
Dear Abby No happy ending for accused in children’s stories of abuse
DEAR ABBY: Some months ago, you published a letter from “Anonymous, Please” regarding her 4-year-old child’s experience with child molestation. She said she had taught her daughter about her private parts at age 4, and “within five months she was molested.” That letter was not the first you have published on the “horror stories” of child molestation. I have been waiting for some letter giving balance to the near hysteria that is gripping our society on the subject. As a lawyer who has handled many cases involving children who were said to have been sexually abused, may I share the following observations: Children do lie. They don’t call it lying they call it “making up stories.” And with encouragement from a parent and “professionals,” these children will eventually believe their own stories. On the basis of an accusation alone, the accused parent may be denied access to his child for months or even years. For years children have been sexually abused by neighbors, baby
Heloise
Cobwebs pose sweeping problem
! Q. Our house has sprayed-on textured ceilings and we live in the country ! where cobwebs are a big problem. Even though I vacuum regularly, the cobwebs on the ceiling are incredible. I’m never able to remove them completely and I’m unhappy about the way my ceiling looks. Any suggestions? Vianna Thompson, Baltimore, Md. A. A cobweb-busting hint is to tie a • piece of nylon net around the end of a yardstick and gently brush the cobwebs down. Press lightly because the textured ceiling will “molt.” Of course, spiders are the culprits and it may be necessary to have your home exterminated. Since these ceilings are quite popular, perhaps my readers will send in their suggestions as well. For those of you
r CONTEST 1
Help The Environment Design a Shopping Bag 16 x 19 bags are available at Rosewood Crafts and all entries must be in by January 4th. Classes are available Dec. 22 and Dec. 29 or paint at home. Call 653-9659 for more details. ißnaeuinoii Crafts k 106 S. Ind. St.
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sitters, trusted friends and relatives. Teaching them to scream, kick, hit and run will not protect them. The best protection is to watch your children closely and keep the lines of communication open. I was in court recently on a child molestation case. The judge stated that more than 80 percent of such cases that had come before him had been frivolous the accusation has been made for the purpose of gaining an advantage in other actions. I have every reason to believe that what the judge said was true.
J
Heloise
who would like to fax your solution, my fax number is 512-HELOISE (4356473). I’d love to hear from you. Heloise FAST FACTS Five handy uses for an old phone book: • Use pages as packing material. • Place one under a desk as a foot rest. • Save for friends or relatives who live • in small towns. • Tape together and use as a child’s booster seat. • Keep one in the car trunk to check addresses or phone numbers. SOFA SHOPPING Dear Heloise: I have been shopping for a new couch and found the perfect one. I ordered it and went home to wait for delivery. Imagine my dismay when jt wouldn’t fit in my living room. So, I measured the area where the couch should fit and took the tape measure along when I went to choose another. This way there will be no surprises. Gloria Morris, San Antonio, Texas My secretary Kelly suggests measuring the doorways as well. Her parents bought a new sofa and you guessed it it wouldn’t fit through the doors! Heloise
One prospective divorce client said to me, “My husband is a sexual deviate a pervert and I want you to see to it that he has no unsupervised contact with our children!” When I pressed her for an example of her husband’s perverted sexual behavior, she replied, “He hides Playboy magazines in his underwear drawer.” A WOMAN LAWYER FROM MISSOURI DEAR LAWYER: Thank you for an excellent letter to illustrate the other side of the story. * * * DEAR ABBY: I am writing this letter on behalf of my father who died last week of lung cancer. He was very smart about so many things, but he wasn’t smart enough to quit smoking before it killed him. I want you to know that my father loved you and your column for as long as you’ve been writing it. I used
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Mr. and Mrs. Joseph Stamper
Lester-Stamper wed Oct. 13
Debbie Sue Lester and Joseph Lloyd Stamper were married Oct. 13 at the First Baptist Church in Lafayette by the Rev. Ernie Elder. The bride is the daughter of Bill and Charlcie Upton, Tazewell, Tenn. She is a graduate of Frontier High School, Brookston, and is employed at the Slate Farm Insurance Co. regional office as a service specialist. The groom is the son of Dr. J.L. Stamper and Mrs. Marian Stamper, both of Greencastle. A 1980 Greencastle High School graduate, he has a degree in animal science and is now attending Purdue University, studying restaurant/hotel management He is employed at the Elks Country Club in Lafayette.
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to tell him that I always read Dear Abby last because I wanted to save the best for the last, then he’d say, “I can’t wait that long. I read her first.” My father loved The Houston Post and he taught his children to love it, too. Anyway, Abby, I just want you to know that you brought a lot of joy into the life of a wonderfill man whose name was Charles Elton. We buried him with his beloved newspaper your section being on top. He would have wanted it that way. With love ... ERICA ELTGN NEHLS, FRIENDSWOOD, TEXAS DEAR ERICA: My heartfelt condolences to you and your family on the loss of a loving father. Thank you for giving me permission (on the telephone) to publish your name. You said you “knew” your father would have loved seeing your letter in The Houston Post. Who knows? Perhaps he can.
The bride wore a champagne wedding dress with boufant chiffon sleeves and sweetheart neckline. Her delicate headpiece was chiffon accented with miniature pearls. Gloves and pearl accessories set off the bridal bouquet of white calla lilies, fem and white pearl roping. The groom’s boutonniere was a white catalya orchid. Bridesmaids and groomsmen had orchids and calla lilies accent floral pieces. The honor attendants were Paul and Juli Stamper, brother and sister-in-law of the groom. A reception at the Elks Country Club followed the ceremony. The couple is residing in Lafayette.
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Mr. and Mrs. Jack Pickett
Picketts will celebrate 50th anniversary Saturday
Jack and Vivian Pickett, 704 E. Washington St, Greencastle, will celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary from 2-4 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 22. A reception will be in the fellowship hall of First Christian Church, 110 S. Indiana St., Greencastle. Pickett and the former Vivian Priest were married Dec. 21, 1940 in the parsonage of First Christian Church by the late Rev. Cecil
Calendar of events Monday The quarterly dinner meeting for the Putnam County Council on Aging and Aged will be at 6 p.m. Monday, Dec. 17 at the Elks Club, 202 S. Indiana St., Greencastle. The Bainbridge Order of Eastern Star will have their regular stated meeting at 7:30 p.m. Monday, Dec. 17 at the Bainbridge Masonic Hall. Each officer is to bring a $3 gift for the grab bag after the meeting in the dining room and finger food for refreshments. TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) No. 573, Greencastle, meets every Monday at 7 p.m. at Mt. Zion Baptist Church, 802 Crown St. Those wishing to attend or in need of information may call 653-9015 or 653-4879. Tuesday TOPS Tuesday morning group meets at 8:30 a.m. at the GTE meeting room, 201 E. Washington St., Greencastle. Everyone is invited to attend. Tots Time free child care, designed for a parents’ morning out, is scheduled from 9 a.m. to noon Tuesdays. It is held each Tuesday, unless otherwise announced, at First Baptist Church, Judson Drive, Greencastle. All children under age five are eligible for the free service. TOPS Ind. Chapter 998, Cloverdale, meets every Tuesday at 9 a.m. at the Conservation Club on Jim Street Road. Visitors are welcome. For more information, call Faye at 672-8303. A public hearing to discuss the Putnam County Welfare Department’s child protection plan is set for 1:30 p.m. Tuesday, Dec. 18 in the commissioners room at the courthouse. The public will have a chance to question the technical aspects of the child protection plan. The Washbum Chapter of DAR will meet at 3:30 p.m. Tuesday, Dec. 18 with Mrs. William H. Johnston. The program will be “DAR Good Citizens Tea.” Mrs. Donald Hart will be the hostess. The Over 50 Club will meet at the VFW home in Greencastle with a carry-in dinner at 6 p.m. Tuesday, Dec. 18. Business meeting, gift exchange and entertainment will follow at 7 p.m. All members and friends invited to attend. The Desert Shield support group will meet at 7 p.m. Tuesday, Dec. 18 at the GTE community room. The support group for adult survivors of incest and other childhood sexual abuse meets from 7-9 p.m. every Tuesday in the office of Putnam County Family Support Services, 122 W. Washington St., Greencastle. For more information call 653-4820. The Civil War Round Table of West Central Indiana will meet at 7:30 p.m. Tuesday, Dec. 18 in room 121 of the DePauw Student Union Building. Note the change in time. Sandi Treaster of Terre Haute, assuming the identity of Alexandra Reed, will present a program of what the home front was like during the Civil War, especially the life of a doctor’s wife during that conflict. Wednesday Tots Time free child care, designed for a parents’ morning out, is scheduled from 9 a.m. to noon Wednesdays at Roachdale Christian Church on Ind. 236 at Roachdale. It is held each Wednesday, unless otherwise announced. All children under age five are eligible for the free service. Thursday The Putnam County Hospital Gift Shop drawing for raffle prizes is set for 1:30 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 20 in the gift shop. The public is invited to a free vitals check for blood sugar, blood pressure, temperature and weight from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 20 at Heritage House Convalescent Center, 1601 Hospital Drive, Greencastle. Call 653-2606 for more information. Women’s Support Group meets from 7-9 p.m. each Thursday at Family Support Services office, 122 W. Washington St. Call 653-4820 for more information. Cloverdale Lodge No. 132 F&AM will have a stated meeting at 7:30 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 20. There will be election of officers for the 1991 year. All invited members are urged to attend. Friday Santa Claus will be in his downtown house at the northeast comer of Indiana and Washington streets in Greencastle from 5-7 p.m. Friday, Dec. 21, From 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 22, and from 1-3 p.m. Sunday, Dec. 23. Saturday Singles-R-Us, a support group fro divorced, widowed or single people, will meet at 7 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 22 at the home of M. Stamper on U.S. 231. Please bring $1 donation. Call 653-6655, 7953003 or 522-1591 for more information. The Cunot Can Dos will have a Christmas Dance from 8-11 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 22 at Forest Park Elementary School in Brazil. The caller will be Jerry Workman with Jill Williams cueing the rounds. Open to the public. Sunday The Madison Township Fire Dept, will have turkey shoots at 1 p.m. each Sunday at the firehouse. Monday A Christmas Eve candle light service is set for 6 p.m. Monday, Dec. 24 at the Beech Grove United Methodist Church. The public is invited to attend. The Rev. Wayne Hoover is pastor.
Fellers. Mrs. Pickett worked several years as a secretary at DePauw University and as a clerk in the ASCS farm office. Pickett worked at IBM for 29 yers, retiring in February 1983. Their two nieces, nephew and families will be hosting the reception. All friends and relative are invited. The couple requests that gifts be omitted.