Banner Graphic, Volume 19, Number 287, Greencastle, Putnam County, 11 August 1989 — Page 4

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THE BANNERGRAPHIC August 11,1989

Grandparents Day

Taking care of their children’s ch

By CATHERINE DRESSLER Associated Press Writer Albert and Mary Etta Johnson hoped after a lifetime of hard work to retire, relax and enjoy golf, traveling and doting on their two young grandchildren. Instead, the Anaheim, Calif., couple are raising their grandchildren while their 28-year-old daughter battles addiction to alcohol, cocaine and heroin. “WE’RE NOT THE grandparents of these children anymore. We’re the parents,” said Johnson, 67. “It’s very miserable. “We’ve already raised our family. The fact is we have very little time for ourselves.” The Johnsons aren’t alone. Despite the stress of financial and health problems, many grandparents are raising grandchildren because addicted parents can’t do the job, experts say. “IT’S DIFFICULT for them to start over again. What they did with their own children years ago doesn’t work now,” said Sylvie de Toledo, a social worker at the Psychiatric Clinic for Youth in Long Beach, Calif., who formed a suppport group called Grandparents as Parents in August 1987. About 50 grandmothers, from varied social and economic backgrounds, belong to the group. Some of the children’s parents died, are ill or were injured, but many neglected or abandoned their kids while abusing drugs or alcohol. THE JOHNSONS’

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Abigail Van Buren

Mosquito bites cannot spread AIDS virus DEAR ABBY: I have a question to ask and don’t know who to ask. If you don’t know the answer, you cam at least find someone who does. Please don’t dismiss this as a dumb question: We are told that AIDS is contracted through body fluids or through needles passed around by drug users. We live in an area where there are lots of mosquitoes. Is it possible for a mosquito to bite a person with AIDS, then infect another person by biting them? In other words, can mosquitoes spread AIDS? DUMB QUESTION FROM ARKANSAS DEAR QUESTION: There is no such thing as a “dumb question.’’ There are, however, stupid (not “dumb,” please dumb means mute) people who remain uninformed because they are too embarrassed to ask. The answer to your question is no, AIDS cannot be spread by mosquitoes. * * * DEAR ABBY: For shame! (And fie on you!) You told “Happily Married” (who wrote to pick a bone with you about not having disclosed a previous divorce): “There is nothing wrong with revealing the truth. Hiding it is deceitful, and, therefore, shameful.” Abby, what’s happened to you? In the past, you have said that a person’s past is not material for the “confession box” between partners. Now you are saying that no matter what the consequences, the truth should be revealed. You goofed, but I love you anyway. CAROL B. IN BELLEVUE, WASH. DEAR CAROL: Whoa - back up. Please don’t put words in my typewriter. Never did I say no matter what the consequences, the truth should be revealed. In the case of “Happily Married,” her father had forbidden her to even date a man in whose family there had been a divorce, so when she met the man she wanted to marry, she asked him not to disclose the fact that his favorite aunt had been divorced! I was trying to make the following point: There was nothing wrong with revealing that particular truth. Divorce is not necessarily a dark and dirty secret. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. Hiding it, in my opinion, was deceitful and, therefore, shameful.

lifestyle

grandchildren, 6-year-old Mark and 7-year-old Nicole, must be driven to visit playmates since children are scarce in their neighborhood. The children’s friends sometimes visit, but Mrs. Johnson, 66, said, “I’ve got my hands full with these two alone.” Despite the burdens, Johnson, who has suffered two heart attacks and twice has undergone openheart surgery, says they have no choice but to give their grandchildren a good home until their daughter can care for them. “They don’t want to see the children split up or put in foster homes,” Ms. De Toledo said. “They love these kids.” “IT’S NOT KNOWN how many children are raised by grandparents, but social agencies say the number is increasing, especially in bigger cities plagued by drugs, said David Liederman, executive director of the Child Welfare League of America. “It’s not new that grandparents have stepped in to take care of grandchildren,” he said. “I think it’s increased at a more than normal

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Mr. and Mrs. Roland Ruark, Rockville, announce the engagement and approaching marriage of their daughter, La Reta, to Mark E. Morrison, the son of Mr. and Mrs. Water Morrison, Park Forest, 111. La Reta is a 1978 graduate of Rockville High School. She is

Heloise

Removing soap deposits

DEAR HELOISE: Help! My husband and l just moved into our first home. The house is 8 years old with that many years' worth of soap and hard-water deposits on the shower walls and door. I have tried everything. Please tell me if there is anything other than dynamite left to try. Patricia K. Jones, McLeansville, N.C. Use a prewash spray to clean the soap and hard-water deposits off the walls and door. A good way is to run lots of hot water so the steam will soften the gunk. Then spray and let it set a while. You may need to scrub it with a brush. After cleaning, polish the door and walls of the shower with lemon oil furniture polish so the water will slide off the surface instead of making those unsightly hard-water spots and soap buildup. When applying the furniture polish, make sure to apply a minimum amount only to the walls and door. Do not let the polish get on the floor of the shower stall. You don't want to slip. Heloise MEDICATION TIP Dear Heloise: This letter should help mothers of teen-agers who are using acne medication. 1 was about out of my mind trying to figure out what 1 was doing wrong on laundry days when colored towels, pillowcases and favorite shirts were coming out streaked. The color either lightened drastically or was totally removed. Turns out that benzoyl peroxide in acne medication is the culprit. After a

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rate because of the tremendous increase in drug-related problems.” Grandmothers sometimes get stuck raising children despite poor vision, arthritis or other health problems that prevent them from providing adequate care, said Calvin Walker, a supervisor at the New Opportunities For The Aging center in Pittsburgh’s mostly poor Hill District neighborhood. The center sometimes helps in the worst situations by finding a babysitter. POVERTY FUELS the cycle in which the grandmother raises up to three generations, Walker said. “The grandmother turns into the maternal parent. It’s like, ‘She was my mother’s mother, now she’s my mother and in some instances she’s my baby’s mother.’” Ms. De Toledo said the grandmothers she counsels range in age from their early 40s to late 70s. Some resent their child-rearing responsibilities. “They don’t have the energy, the patience, the stamina that they used to have. “The majority have worked all their lives and now have used whatever they had saved for retirement ”

a systems engineer for IBM in South Bend. Mark is a 1973 graduate of Rich Central High School in Olympia Fields, IH. He is also employed as a systems engineer for IBM in South Bend. A November wedding is planned.

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Heloise

lot of sleuthing. 1 finally made the connection. So, to avoid future grief, I provide my sons with white washcloths and they too are now aware that although this stuff may help their skin, it also bleaches their shirts. Since few people read the labels of these products, you’d be doing them a great service by calling attention to this fact. I wish someone had told me before I put out the beautiful new sapphire-blue towels. Jo Misencik, Middleburg, Fla. Another reader wrote in that she had small bleach spots on the carpeting in front of her television where her son always lounged in the evening. The acne medication was also the culprit in this case. The boy didn't always wash his hands well enough to totally remove the medication, which in turn transferred onto the carpeting and created the bleached area. Heloise

AND THEN...

A caterpillar crawls along a branch. So unsightly and useless is he that, at best, he is scorned, at worst, exterminated. # A grain of sand, one of an infinite number, lodges within ■ an oyster's shell. It is coarse and hard, worthless and un- ■ wanted. H And then, there are people. They are restless, a bit lonely sometimes, and apprehensive about the future. They enter Jjj| churches and speak to God. From the cocoon, a gaily-colored butterfly emerges. People paint pictures of it: children try to claim it as their own. From the oyster, a pale, creamy pearl is taken. It is admired, sold for a small fortune, prized. So. God changes the lowly caterpillar and richly clothes the grain of sand. How much more can He change the lives of those who ask it of Him! God awaits you. Come meet Him in His house this week. 1 B B I Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday Isaiah Ezekiel Zechanah Malachi Matthew Matthew Mark 44:21-28 3 4:1-10 3 19:16-30 20:1-16 8:31-38 Scnptures Selected by The American B>tXe Society j| Cocv-giT ’989 kesie' A a-s Newsoape Services P C Bo* 8006 Chanottesv.iie VAJ29O6

This weekly message is sponsored by these local businesses:

GREENCASTLE OFFSET PRINTING Terry & Pat McCarter, 20 S. Jackson 653-4026 AMERICAN FAMILY INSURANCE Mark Wager Agency 200 N. Vine, Greencastle 653-8344 HUMPHREYS’ WHEEL HORSE Sales & Service, US 231 N. 653-3019 JULIE’S POODLE PARLOR Wayne, Julie 4 Aaron Bums, 11 Bloomington St. 653-5573 GREENCASTLE FEED CENTER, INC. U.S. Hwy. 231 North, Greencastle 653-4191 CENTRAL NATIONAL BANK Officers, Directors 4 Staff, 1 Central Square WAL-MART DISCOUNT STORE Management 4 Associates. 653-2481 25 Putnam Plaza, Greencastle KROMME PLUMBING & HEATING Gene Sawyer 4 Staff, 1111 S. Locust 653-4694 MAMA NUNZ’S PIZZA Jo Ruth Cancilla, owner, 800 S. Main 653-8402 SHADY CREEK HEALTH CARE FACILITY Ted Merrick, Ex. Dir., 4 Staff, 1306 Bloomington 653-2406 SHUEE& SONS TV & APPLIANCE Sales and Staff 24 N. Jackson, Greencastle The Shuee Family and Staff THE WALDEN INN Matthew O’Neill 4 Staff, 2 East Seminary 653-2761 LONE STAR INDUSTRIES Greencastle, Indiana SYSTECH CORPORATION Quality Control Analysis of Flammable Liquids Greencastle, IN BRACKNEY'S WESTERN STORE The Brackney Family, U.S. Hwy. 231 N. 653-9464 compliments of the GREENCASTLE NURSING HOME 815 E. Tacoma, 2 blks. N. of Armory CENTRAL INSURANCE AGENCY, INC. ‘Monty Montgomery ‘Rick Sharp ‘Charlene O'Neal 653-2641 DAVES’ HEATING & COOLING Dave Cox 4 Dave Corbin, props. 124 N. Jackson 653-7346 GIRTON’S BOOK SHOP Bob Girton 4 Staff 12 W Washington, Greencastle 653-2665 IBM (Ind.) EMPLOYEES FEDERAL CREDIT UNION 13 Putnam Plaza, 653-9731 FARM BUREAU INSURANCE Agents Jeff Eslinger, Brian Christy, Larry Grounds, Mike Clodfelter-653-9797 QUANTUM MECHANICAL INC. Heating * Air Conditioning Refrigeration RR 6, Box 45 Greencastle 739-6222 CASH CONCRETE PRODUCTS, INC. ■Since 1919* Webb Road 653-6533 PUTNAM INN RESTAURANT Ron Hansen 4 Staff 400 N. Jackson Greencastle 653-8777 B&E ELECTRIC SERVICE Electric 4 Commercial Refrigeration 1108 So. Locust 653-3953 CROWN VENDING SERVICE CO. 653-8668-dependable food 4 refreshment vending service for The Greencastle Area.

KERSEY MUSIC COMPANY David 4 Sandra Fanning 4 Staff 11 N. Indiana St., Greencastle 653-6824 BLACK LUMBER CO. 501 North Indiana, Greencastle 653-5171 BILL COLE, INC. Sanitation 4 Excavation, Fillmore 246-6174 SKELTON-SKINNER LUMBER CO. Retail-Wholesale-Transil Shippers 1221 S. Bloomington 653-9705 TRI-COUNTY BANK & TRUST CO. member FDIC-Roachdale-Bainbndge-Russellville HERITAGE HOUSE CONVALESCENT CENTER OF PUTNAM CO. 1601 Hospital Dr. 653-2602 SUNSET MANOR NURSING HOME 1109 So. Indiana 653-3143 JOE ELLIS HEATING AND AIR CONDITIONING, INC. 116 W. Franklin, David Masten, 653-6712 SERVICE GLASS Merle 4 Carol Dixon 4 Staff, 1104 N. Jackson 653-9452 ALBIN’S POOLS & SPAS Norma 4 Tom Albin, Albin Pond Rd. 653-3228 PIZZA KING 653-3184 or 653-3185 400 Bloomington, Greencastle THE ROCKING HORSE The Childrens Specialty Store M-F 9-6; Sat. 9-5; Sun. 1-5, North Side of Greencastle Square A. HUBER & SONS PLUMBING Heating 4 Air Conditioning, Indianapolis Road 653-3133 PARK L. FIREBAUGH, DDS Evenings by appointment 653-5501 49 Putnam Plaza Greencastle MALLORY CAPACITOR COMPANY A Div. of Mallory Components Group Emharf Industnes, Inc. COMMUNICATIONS CORPORATION OF INDIANA The Telephone Company’ Roachdale, Indiana GREENCASTLE HOG MARKET John McCorkle, Mgr. 4 Staff Greencastle, Indiana GREENCASTLE MANUFACTURING CO. Manhattan Road Phone 653-2611 MUFFLER CONNECTION Jim 4 Candy Robinson 4 Staff 816 No. Jackson, Greencastle 653-4424 JENKINS STANDARD SERVICE Indiana 4 Walnut Streets Greencastle 653-9933 B. VIDEO HEAVEN Sales 4 Rental 653-8789 24 S. Indiana, Greencastle MOHR CHIROPRACTIC CENTER P.C. Dr. David Mohr Greencastle. Indiana BRIAN SMITH’S BODY SHOP ' Junction U.S. 231 4 U.S. 36, Bambridge 522-6703 YORK PONTIAC-OLDS-GMC TRUCKS Hwy. U.S. 231 North Greencastle, 653-8426