Banner Graphic, Volume 18, Number 25, Greencastle, Putnam County, 6 October 1987 — Page 4

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THE BANNERGRAPHIC October 6,1987

Dear Abby

DEAR ABBY: I’ve been friends with “Violet” for a long time. We work together. I was thrilled when she asked me to be a bridesmaid. I helped her select the bridesmaids’ dresses and also helped her plan her wedding. When I received my invitation, I learned that I was expected to come without my fiance. I thought it was an oversight because Violet knows I have a fiance, so I mentioned it. She said she was sorry but nobody could invite an escort because she couldn’t afford to have extra people. It’s to be a catered affair. I tried to explain that I really wanted my fiance to be there. I even offered to pay for his dinner in advance. She said no. I told her if she couldn’t let my fiance come, I couldn’t be in her wedding party. Well, I dropped out, and now we aren’t friends anymore. Was I wrong, or was she? Can you figure out why she refused to have my fiance at her wedding? I sure can’t. FEELS TERRIBLE, STATEN ISLAND DEAR FEELS TERRIBLE: She was wrong. It’s possible that she couldn’t afford the extra dinner, but since you offered to pay for it and she refused, I would conclude that she didn’t want your fiance at her wedding. ♦ ♦ ♦ DEAR ABBY: I do volunteer work with an alumni association at a large state university. We have a

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difficult time trying to locate our alums who move or change their names through marriage. People with common names may not realize how many William Johnsons or Susan Smiths we have. A serious complication is women who give us no clue as to who they are. Who is “Mrs. K. Jones”? How much clearer it would be if she signed her name “Mrs. Karen (Adams) Jones.” We do not always want money. We would like to notify alums of reunions, travel opportunities, lectures, art exhibits, etc. Abby, please suggest that grads write to their alma maters to let former classmates know where they are and what they’re doing. We really care. LOIS HAUGERUD, ALUMNI VOLUNTEER, RICHFIELD, MINN. P.S. It would be nice to include a donation to the college scholarship fund, too. The cost of education continues to climb, and public and corporate support is dropping off seriously.

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DEAR LOIS: Your “P.S.” may be the reason so many “alums” are hard to find. But I agree, alums should contact their alma maters in order to be notified of class reunions. And those who are well-heeled enough to send a few bucks to good old “Podunk U” for the scholarship fund should do so and willingly. * * * DEAR ABBY: My mother and I have been arguing about this for some time now, and I need your opinion so we can finally settle the matter. Every time Mother stays in a motel, she looks around the bathroom for an extra roll of toilet paper, and when she finds it, she takes it home! She claims that the price of the room is so high, she is entitled to it. I personally think it is degrading. Honestly, Abby, my mother is not so hard up she has to steal toilet paper. Am I right to assume that the toilet paper in hotel and motel rooms is there for the use of the guests during their stay not to take home? MRS. WIPPLE DEAR MRS. WIPPLE: Yes, but most motel and hotel managers would gladly settle for disappearing toilet paper. Guests have been known to steal pictures, lamps, carpets, draperies, pillows, bedspreads, furniture and anything else that isn’t nailed down. Some even try to steal away without paying for the room.

Heloise File away paint tips

DEAR HELOISE: When we first bought our home, we weren’t sure of how much paint we needed for each room or for the exterior. We kept track of the amounts, recorded this information on 3-by-5 cards and filed them with important papers in our home-improvement file. When it was time to paint again, we knew exactly how much to buy. Sometimes a second coat is needed when putting a light over a dark color. This system sure beats guessing. N. Laing, Ravenna, Ohio It sure does. It can also save you money! Sure am glad you wrote. Heloise SCHOOL PICTURES Dear Heloise: If you have children or grandchildren in their first year of school, begin to save their individual school pictures. Most of us already know this, but here is what I do. I arrange the pictures through the years in a frame, adding each year’s picture as it comes along. Each child has his/her own frame and a special place where it is hung. Mildred Mori, Belle Vernon, Pa. TELEPHONE CORDS Dear Heloise: There is a way to keep the telephone handset cord from tangling preventive maintenance. Form the habit of giving the handset a turn or two each time you pick it up, undoing the couple of twists it seems to get each time it is used. A little regular care keeps the cord out of that hopeless tangle. S.W., Washington, D.C.

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DEAR ABBY: I am nearly 21 years old and I met my real father for the first time six months ago at the funeral of my grandmother. (She was his mother.) That day my father was very kind to me, and I was thrilled to meet the father that I had been missing for so many years. (He and my mother divorced when I was a baby.) I gave him my address and phone number and waited and waited to hear from him, but he never called or wrote. I wrote him a letter telling him I wanted to see him again to establish a real father-daughter relationship with him. He wrote back saying it was impossible, and he did not want to see me again! Abby, I know it is his new wife’s doings. I really want a father in my life and this man is my blood father, and it is not fair for him to reject me. I feel so hurt and alone, and I really need a close relationship with him. We live 2,000 miles apart, but that is no excuse. Please help me figure out how I can get him to see me and treat me like his daughter. I have written him countless letters, begging him to call or write me, but I have had no response. What should I do? Now that I have found him, I want him in my life - REJECTED AND HURT DEAR REJECTED: You cannot force your father to be a “real father” to you if he chooses not to. It’s sad, unfortunate and unfair, but he has made his feelings for now crystal clear. Accept this painful decision and do not pursue him.

'W 3 * w *VW a i

Heloise

Oh, one of life’s little bothers. Your hint will help prevent the problem. Heloise NOTE PAD AND PEN Dear Heloise: When I stopped to visit friends and found them gone or couldn’t reach them by phone, I was frustrated that they were unaware that I wanted to reach them. Now I carry a self-sticking note pad (which eliminates tape or push pins) and a pen in my purse at all times. Presto, I can leave a note stuck to the door or a window. Let it be known, I was there! Eleanor Tummonds, Penfield. N.Y. LITTLE BASKETS Dear Heloise: I keep all of my sauce packets and instant mixes on my counter in a little basket. Looks really cute and it is convenient too. This idea would also be good for the bathroom. Little things like fingernail files, cuticle stick, dental id ss, etc. would be right at your fingertips. Sandy Mobley, Birmingham, Ala.

Calendar of events Tuesday Theta Chapter, Delta Theta Tau will meet at 8 p.m. Tuesday, Oct. 6 at Kiddie Corner. The Putnam County Computer Club will meet at 7 p.m. Tuesday Oct. 6 at GMI Satellites and Computers, 604 N. Jackson St., Greencastle. Tri Kappa sorority will meet at 8 p.m. Tuesday, Oct. 6 at Feld’s Carpet Place. Wednesday Mrs. Clinton Gass will be the hostess to the Woman’s Club Wednesday, Oct. 7. She will be assisted by Mrs. Maynard Shonkwiler, who will also give the devotions. Mrs. Daniel L. Smith will present the program. Women of the Moose will hold an installation meeting at 8 p.m. Wednesday, Oct. 7. Greencastle Order of Eastern Star No. 255 will meet at 7:30 p.m. Wednesday, Oct. 7 at the Greencastle Masonic Temple for Friends Night. Each member is to bring a large salad. VFW Fathers Auxiliary will meet at 7:30 p.m. Wednesday, Oct. 7 at the Post 1550 home. Associate Tri Kappa will meet at 10 a.m. Wednesday, Oct. 7 at the home of Muri Keller, 724 Kirkwood Drive. TOPS No. 592, Bainbridge, will hold an open house at 6 p.m. Wednesday at the home of Mary Shoaf. First month is free. New and former members welcome. Call 522-3249 for more information. Thursday Alpha Gamma Delta Alumnae will entertain pledges at a dessert buffet at 6:30 p.m. Thursday, Oct. 8 at the home of Mrs. Robert Bottoms. The Putnam County Cemetery Board will meet at 6:30 p.m. Thursday, Oct. 8 at the Double Decker. All interested persons are invited. A special 4-H Rabbit Club meeting will be held in the Community Building at the Putnam County Fairgrounds, beginning at 6:30 p.m. Thursday, Oct. 8. Plans for next year’s Rabbit Club will be discussed. The Beech Grove United Methodist Ladies Aid will meet all day Thursday, Oct. 8 at the church. Ham, beans and cornbread will be served. Bring salad or dessert. Men are invited and will rake the yard, weather permitting. Friday A called meeting of Owen Lodge No. 655, F & AM Quincy, is scheduled for 7 p.m. Friday, Oct. 9. Work will be in the E. A. degree. Women’s Study Club will meet at 2 p.m. Friday, Oct. 9 at the home of Jennie Moore. Crosswalkers Square Dance Club will dance 8-11 p.m. Friday, Oct. 9 at the 4-H building in Rockville. Nick Hartley will be the caller. Covered Bridge Festival guests are welcome. Century club will meet at 2 p.m. Friday, Oct. 9 at the home of Mrs. E.B. Glascoff. Saturday An old-fashioned square dance will be held from 8 p.m. to midnight Saturday, Oct. 10 at the Roachdale Lions Hall. Admission is $3 per person. Everyone is welcome. Those who can’t square dance, but would like to, will be taught. Bainbridge Masonic Lodge will be serving breakfast 6-11 a.m. Saturday, Oct. 10 at hte Masonic Lodge hall. Sunday The Bainbridge Saddle Club will hold its last horse show of 1987, starting at 10 a.m. Sunday, Oct. 11 at the club grounds west of Brick Chapel. Classes for all ages. Everyone welcome. Show held rain or shine. The Greencastle Branch of the NAACP will meet at 7 p.m. Sunday, Oct. 11 at Mt. Zion Baptist Church, 803 Crown St. Executive board will meet at 6:30. Everyone is welcome to attendMonday Chapter CB, PEO Sisterhood, will hold its regular meeting at 8 p.m. Monday, Oct. 12 at the home of Dorothy Sawyer. Please note change of meeting place.

Notices for publication in the calendar of events cannot be taken over the telephone. Calendar items must be submitted in writing at least 10 days in advance of the events to which they refer. The earlier the submission, the better. Each notice should include a telephone number for use by the newspaper in case further information or clarification is needed. Notices may be delivered to the Banner-Graphic office at 100 N. Jackson St. or mailed to the newspaper at P.O. Box 509, Greencastle, IN 46135.