Muncie Times, Muncie, Delaware County, 6 March 2008 — Page 11

The Muncie Times • March 6, 2008 • Page 11

continued from page 10 power cries, people start to wonder if she has what it takes to run a country, no matter how stereotypical or unfair such questions may be," says Rivera. "After Hillary cried, it was Can she handle the pressures she'll encounter as president? and Was she being genuine or manipulative? By crying she threw herself right into what I call the 'Can She Take It?' Test. As a woman in a male-dominated industry, you must never give anyone an opportunity to question your abilities. Next time around the female candidate must ensure that she keeps the crying card off the table. Women should be direct, honest, and meaningful when communicating, but they can't get emotional." Act like a lady. Former British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher always presented herself with grace and poise even while she met the challenges of her office head on. And that doesn't mean she ever backed down from a fight. (One Soviet newspaper of the time even called her "Iron Lady.") Female political candidates should emulate Thatcher by believing in themselves and their inner strengths. They should know and keep their boundaries and show infinite grace under pressure. They should refrain from ridiculing or bashing other women or men. If they do these things, it will be easier for them to win people over.

"I think these are rules to live by for any woman and especially those running for president or any other political office," says Rivera. "One place Hillary failed in this area was by not congratulating Obama on his wins in Virginia, DC, and Maryland. It made her look like a sore loser, not someone who values grace and poise. Consider how Jacqueline Ingrassia, who was the first female to win the Triple Crown, described her experiences in the male-dominated world of horse racing. She said, 'It has been a delicate balance of standing up for my rights while maintaining dignity and class.' Those are two qualities that will never hurt a presidential campaign." Let your emotional intelligence show. Demonstrating a high level of emotional intelligence will set women apart in the political arena. Essentially, emotional intelligence is the ability to interpret your own feelings and emotions, gauge the feelings and emotions of others, and then use that information to guide yourself and others toward specific goals. In his book Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ, Daniel Goleman found that women tend to be more empathetic than men and are better at relating and interacting with others. "Any woman who enters a race for the presidency is going to be held to a higher set of standards than her male counterparts," says Rivera.

"Look at Hillary: She is more critically evaluated and is under more intense scrutiny. Fortunately, women are better able to sense emotions, adapt to situations, and nurture relationships with potential voters. I think people want a president who cares about their wellbeing. The right female candidate will use her emotional intelligence to show people that she empathizes with them. She will be a caring woman who really understands what we Americans are feeling and going through. And she can use that information to become a great leader." Always be open and honest. Any female candidate is bound to encounter men who are chauvinistic, stubborn, and unthinking. It's a given. But in order to appeal more to male voters, a female candidate need only share her thoughts openly and honestly. "If you talk to men honestly and with consideration, they will open up and become less rude, less stubborn, and less unthinking," says Rivera. "Men, just like us women, like it when someone else is curious about their thoughts and opinions. Ask them what they think about an issue and watch them open up. Be straightforward when you share your feelings and thoughts. When men know that they are being dealt with in a straightforward manner, they will respect you." Learn the intricacies of male/female dynamics. To succeed in this or any

male-dominated field, a woman needs a good understanding of gender dynamics. "Here's what I have learned about men and women during my career: I think men benefit more from male/female relationships than women do," says Rivera. "Men enjoy the nurturance of these relationships and enjoy 'confiding' in women. I've also noticed that women are less brutally honest and direct than men. I like the male directness I've encountered over the years because I always know where I stand with a man. And both men and women need to feel respected. If potential voters, regardless of gender, feel that a female candidate respects their ideas and their feelings, they will learn to like and trust her." Reach out to other women. Obviously, other women are key to getting a female candidate elected as president. The right woman will be one who has an incredible network of female supporters— both within and outside of the political realm— who have helped her rise through the ranks and whom she has helped in the same way. Women are great sounding boards, and the more a female presidential candidate can interact with and learn from them the better. "The same characteristics that men find appealing—a decisive nature and honesty, for example—women also find appealing," says Rivera. "When a candidate has these natural qualities, or

at least seeks earnestly to cultivate them, she'll gain female supporters. I think there is a special excitement among women during this political time, because we are seeing one of our own up there taking on the men. And whether Hillary wins the candidacy or not, she should be commended for the work she has done during her campaign. I think women have been a huge support system for Hillary, and that is sure to hold true for other female candidates in future elections." Be a consensus-builder. Every great leader is a consensus-builder, but for women working in male-dominated industries, a special effort has to be made to bridge the gap between themselves and their male counterparts. This becomes especially true for a woman trying to win votes in a presidential election. "I think this is an area in which Hillary failed," says Rivera. "I think Barack has done a better job at being a consensusbuilder and truly connecting with others. At times, for me at least, it seems as though Hillary has struggled to connect with others and has seemed tightly-wound and offputting. It seems as though Barack has listened to what people in a variety of different groups want and need from the next president, and he has been able to communicate to each of them the way he can meet their needs both individually and as a larger popucontinued on page 38