Saturday Evening Mail, Volume 2, Number 7, Terre Haute, Vigo County, 12 August 1871 — Page 1

Vol. 2. No. 7.

141

(11 NHF.N G—fiOc. UREASE-Brown, W*oe. HI DKS—Green Trimmed, w.

#-:«7

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T« i$rf£'A

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tS-'P^iZ'Jl .«**i •-T'r

THE MAIL.

Office, 142 Main Street.

TF.RKF.-UA UTR PRINTING HOUSE.

O. J. SMITH

&

IPCMJANAPOMH 4 HT. I/JlIIH K. R. Arrive from tout. Dejtartfor Wert. :4G a. ra Fast Express 5:50 a. 111. Hn65 a. i« Iay Express 10^8 a. m. IWJ p. HI Night Express 10:3K p. in. j(:.r5 p. .Walloon Acc'dn 4:07 p. in.

Frtrm the West. For the Eart. 4:07 p. ra T)ay Express

Kalbnl, l'«e.

Dry 14(i»l5c.

-..y Klint. l«c.

te

The report

Co.

Steam Job Printers,

Hulman Block, 141 Main Street, TKRHB-HAHTE, IND.

Railroad

& Commercial Printing a Specialty.

RAIITOIMI TIME Table.

TASDAMA SHORT T.IXK. IiidianajHjlU

fs?av. Arrive. V2:Vi a. N'fff York Expre*s_...5:.!)0 a. m. I:WS p. ni Lightning Express 1020 p. m. a. r/i Day Express &V» P- m. 1:10 p. m...,fiid'I accommodation....lO:lO a. in. fit. Ixmis DivUirm. 7av. Arrive. 5:55 a. Pacific Express 12:30 ft. m. lorfBi p. Fast Line p. m. 4:0« p. in Ht. L. A Cairo Kx 10:15 a. m.

v.

I,ninbiklii,

7V.

Hlu-arllngN, ikjc.

TA I.Ti W—7S6o. I'ROVlMltJNrf—limns 10(il'2'.

HIIOUIIIITH IKJJTTC.

I,AHl-«'ountry,7(.Jttc. POTATOES -»!0ittiKJ. POUl/niY—Tiuktyn, allvo per pomnl.Kc. l)r«nu«,l lliyjl^c*

Ducks j)or *low»n, f"2 00. ithwo W .n ('iilckcns, old, pordoxen, 13 00. yoilliK, 115002 00.

HKEDS-Flax. fl 45. HAUS~-('otton, NVOOU—Tub-wiwIuhI, HOiliftK'.

FIwhh' Kuwaaliod, I0ml2o.

HOUH -Livi' urots ?." 70@5 80.

CINCINNATI. CINCINNATI,

COTTON

Aug. 10.

Dull and nominal middling,

lDiiilKV-FI.OUR--IVmnnd ftilr and priewt ndvanch1 fHMill v, $.1 75.

WHEAT An iHtvanct* i»*k«Hl(_biH none fHtubllnbod rnl held at 91 l'2c«tj CORN- Quk't and unchaiiKfl «»iir52c.

RYE—Uuh't anil weak at H7c««6IK-. 1ATH-l»ull and dnHipinir mixed. 30!«k\ HARI.EY—liulft and nnch«nm'l fall, SU

^COFFEE—In ftvlr «lenu»nd and market firm prime is V". st'ilAR -stonily raw. I Iwl^c.

KUGS -quiet and unelianjunl at 12^. HCTTER Steady. t"HKESE Ouiel and nnohan«ed. PROVISIONS—IHjrk dull and nominal at tlVkAlS tt. lhilk meat* dull and drooping .v*U* at .Vfltk' for sho«UI«T atliI rough aides. )incon dull ami drooplmt: shoulder*. Ntles of sides at 7P: cl«n»r rib*, 7

recently

,n*

12-28 a. in I l?btnlngExpress...12:30 a. 111. ."»:o0 a. in Night Kxpriw &:•>•' a. m. 10-15 a. in Mat toon Acc'dn 12:10 p. m.

EVAMSVI I.LR

A

I/rave.

CKAWKORDHVILI/K K. K.

Arrive.

Kxpres#!.. Mall.........

5:5(I ». m, :i5ti p. in

Leave.

4:85

p.

10:15 p. m. ..,1:30 p. in.

KOC'KVIM.K KXTKNSION.

Arrive.

Mail 1030 a. m.

T. II. A CHICAGO KAILWAY,

Uave. Arrive 4:15 P. 10:10 A.

Markets.

TERKE-HAUTE MARKET.

TKRBK-HAUTK, AUR.

The following figures are paid to farmers anil othar* by dealers In this city: BEESWAX-Yellow, 2.Vj:«)c. 11UTTE Be* t.l 2'it 20e.

CORN MEAL—oO(fVx-. EGUS-Fri-sli.&fUlOo. KEATH ERB—Live Geese, .V««0c.

Old 10fa4Uc.

FtiOtTR-Fancy brnnds, $." 7vr«l. FRUIT—Green Apples, "25(ijil(K-. Dried Apples, 7c.

Dried Peaches, 11 rtJlUc.

(JRAIN—Corn, 8uo.

RvfVfftwfi&o. -JD»w White MTClowtrW 10. sfjipsf Alabama, II O.I. .if

Mediterranean, 3

H«»

toiubor clear held at 7*y. l.ARU -null and tlecllmnl: sales of prime kettle at #0 summer made, held at H^C.

HtHIS--Sn»r«o %|id firm at 14 *)(%*4 ni, c.vrri.K--Dull ind nominal. TOR VfCO-Sales »f IW ho«-hia«U. W H1SK Y-IH-mand g*»o*l at full prlww, «V. s,-

rni('Aja CHIPAOO,

Aug.

10.

Fl.Ol?R—Quiet. VHE\T~o. 'tjiprlng active and c**ler, tuui ohm*! at #. ®(j»l «V cash, and *1S 00for August. This anornoon the market was dull at fl ""'i tor August.

CORN No. "2 spring active and v4e lower, find closed at 4-V««V- This afternoon the market wa*dull at

4-,*e

eash.

o.\TS No. 2 active ami stead} at SftjiSlc,

TRYE--No. 2

1c

quiet and

Othet ai

lower at SS^Me.

vHt.KY—Spring, No. '2, easier and Ic lower at tiS'-yaii'V. PROVISIONS—Mew pork, 112 3S#12 50, «*h, and fl2 all the vetu. lUMiS -Stetidy a* $4

Pork

WINK

a«h. I \UD 1 KGWjs H,

iu«a,

113 SS

ill: I'T lm. avy

The News.

noMK.sTm

The Rr imbllcan minority In North Carolina will U- Iwrtweeti l(.,w0i uiut l'2,iW0,

it rn't'.Ulls :u\.1 't« Hl. iu the Uv.ln

'U» lOI 21. He.i

Bairtvery

r. js its from Keiii. o« tli« tu«' .ii» rac* oi of l!U!i Tin- R«»put».es. lutek i-: ti m.l ivCiil4»l,!y L«, .IN IV,., r:. ', !•»(. n. -talc.

U:»

l» twenty-!"!'.« lu«^ R' A»l..11 'hi... 1. iH-.tOvS

circulated that Charles

Francis Adams ha*di*lin«l the appointment of arbitrator nnder tlie Treatj Washington, is incorrect. The Tu«ilay received a tel^ram from that gen* tleinan informing him of iUJ aceeptance.

Tuewiay night General Porter called upjon Commif«ioner Plea-sauton with

a,

^.™1

message requesting him to resign his office. Tills Pleananton declined doing. The Prraident l»elng informed 01 the declination, resolved to suspend Pleasanton and ttpfoint iJeputy Commissioner Douglass in his place.

A special to the Cincinnati Gmette says Welne«day evening while T. M. Bennett, proprietor of a dry gooes and grocery store, in Vienna, Clarke county, Ohio, was drawing ruse oil from a large can in the back room of hisestabllsnrnent, the fluid or gas from it was ignited by a candle he held 111 hit* hand, filling the room with flame. Thirty or forty person* in the village rushed to the house to the a*sistance of Bennett, and to stive property, when two kegs of powder, which was in the building, exploded, sending up an immense column of flour and rending the building, which fell in rula.H, burying four persons, Daviu C. Johnson, Al. Clark, Henry Baldwin and A. Uordon, who received HUCIi Injuria that thej C4tn not recover. In addition to these, alentine Nicely was badly bruised and burned about the face, Mrs. Smith's body was bad bruised ami two lingers broken, Mrs. k"a Frost's head was severely

(-ut.

Nine others

are known to have received slight injuries. An account states that twenty-seven persons are more or less hurt. Mr. IJennett escaiied uninjured. Drs. Barnwell, ilazaird, Hunter and others have been busy all today caring for the sufferers.

FOREIGN.

The second municipal election was held at Strasbiirg Tuesday. Only 817 persons voted in a population of 11,000. A similar result attended the election ill Mulhause and other conquered towns.

The French Government, it is stated, proposes an indemnification of the provinces wiilch Were invaded by the Germans, and the people of those provinces will be divided into three classes, in proportion to the amount of loss, precedence' being given to those utterly ruined by the war.

Assistant Secretary of the Treasury Richardson has completed negotiations for the balance of the new American five percent, ltonds, witli the house of Jay Cooke, Mc('ullochiS Co. The announcement of the arrangement has occjisloned considerable advance In the prices of United States bonds In the London market.

A Herald correspondent writing from Kounen says that the Prussian occupation of France is every day rendeiing the situation

more

unpleasant. Strife and bloodshed

between small numbers of the Germans and the French people are frequent, and the murders of Prussian private soldiers which have taken place render the Prussian soldiers more harsh and embittered.

A meeting was held at Heidelberg, on Sunday, to take measures for the foundation of the Church German. Forty delegates were present coming from various parts of Germany, Austria and Switzerland. A committee was appointed to draw up a constitution for the new church. Its main points will be the principle of the Council, of Constance, 1314, subordination to ihe Pope and Council* a a I management o! the church free election of Bishops communal election of pastors mollification of the confessional.

The permanent deputation of the Mexican Congress finished counting the electoral vdte for President on the 27th, with the following result: Diaz, l,Hh2 Juarez, 1,968 Ijcrdo, 1,806. There being no choice, according to the Constitution, the election goes to Congress, where, If a coalition of the opponents of Juarez is effected, the majority will be against him. An attempt will be made to unite the votes of the opposition on Diaz. The permanent deputation is known to be hostile to Juarez. Tlieeneinles of Juan* report that he proposes to bribe doubtful Congressmen and Imprison others before tluty can reach the capital. Oil the other hand the Dinro. the official organ ot the Government, declares that Juarez has a mnjorlty over all his competitors. In this conflict of authority and direct contradiction of statements, It Is Impossible as yet to decide who actually Is elected.

A great riot occurred in Dublin Tuesday because the Board of Public Works prohibited the proposed Fenian amnesty meeting, organized by Smyth, member from West Meath, Sullivan, editor of the Nation, and O'Bvrne, editor of the Irishman. Notwithstanding the onier, at four o'clock i'. M. a vast crowd of men, women and children assemble around the Wellington monument In Phoenix park, some three hundred yards from the Vice Royal Ixxlge, wheiv the royal party are stopping, and where a large force of policemen were held In reserve. Smyth, Sullivan and Nolan, at theheadof five hundred men, mounted and wearing green, arrived, and ascending the statue, opened the meeting. The superintendent advanced and the people groaned and hissed. The suiterlntendent, who showed a determination to break up the mutiny, was knocked down then the police rushed up and a fright nil fight ensued. The officers drew their mace* and felled the people by scores. The conflict became hotter stones were thrown, slicks plied by the mob, and •women and children trampled under foot. The riot lasted half an hour. Forty-seven persons ar^ known to have been wounded, manv serlouslv. Smith, Sullivan and No-

7

Ian are badly liurt1_and many of the police received bruises. The h(*»pttals ar full of

ured. There N great excitement

the InJ .. throughout the city. The police were attacked re|»eated, but eventually order was restored. The leaders of the meeting are to le prosecuted. During the riot the military were prepared, but were not called out. The fighting extended all the length of the quay. Every window showing the flag In honor of loyalty was smashed

(»KNt*iNR KLOQURXric.—Leith, 'in his travels in Ireland, gays:—4n n»y morning rambles, a man sitting on the ground, loaning his back against the wall, attracted my attention by a look of squalor in his" anpearanee which I had rarely ol^served, even in Ireland. His clothes were ragged to indecency, and his face waa pale and sickly, lie did not address mo, but having gone a flpw paeos, my heart smote me, and I turned hack.

If you are in want," said I with a degrfc'of peevishness, "why don't you

VTn^Acilvc "and rtrmer ftt 53 «»$$ bee T" sure it's begging I am," wa* the re*"Jpiv. vwv vnns Yon did not utter a word."

Alio 1ft. I "No! ia it joking you are with me.

JSKW \OHK. Aug. |„jr. Look here!" LM»aaid, holding up

FKOCR Dull and dn»oplng at t» |j1(% taUorvd rt-mnant of what had one* •i'pvKtfmi mixed. coal: "do yott how the akin PROVISIONS

shaking through the holes in uiv

trousers, aud tlie bones crying out through the akin?

IAKIR

4

[From the St. Louis Republican.] A FAITHFUL FRIEND.

BY ANNA I.. KL'TH.

'Twixt us, there need be no token of the friendship pure and free. That till life's bright cord be broken 1 shall cherish, dear, for thee. Duty sternly bids us sever,

and

as

IH'

at my sunk*

en cheeks, and the famine that's storing In mv ev»*! Man alive! isn't it begging that 1 an» with a hundred tongues?"

W

rejoices in

crowd of listeners ana

AN

orator always t»ig that is why a iabie teinosthen«« row to explain, at a political meeting in Alabama, the other d.i,. "Feller trablersv* he staid, "ef I h*tl eat in, dried apples for a

IK, JH»* I took to drinkm' for a in*.lit,* 1 couldn't feel more swelled np dan I am dis minit wid ]:,? and wamiy id Miin' mich full 'uatuyce bar dis UVflUlt'."

TERRE-HAUTE, SATURDAY EVENING, AUGUST 12, 1871

Ey

-n

Far apart our life-paths tend, Yet forever and forever Thine shall be one faithful friend.

God be with thee! and if ever Life seems dreary hope in vain, Think one heart thy sorrow sliareth,

Echoes everv throb of pain. Think, when life's long vigil's over, ,t If we keep it to the end, Re-united, ne'er to sever,

Thou inayst claim thy faithful friend!

THE CHEST ERF I ELD I AN iOF LIFE. sm The memory of Lord Chesterfield has acquired a certain tinge ot absurdity. We associate his name with triumphs of tailoring, and with an etfete danlvisni of the most artificial type. His memory smells of rouge and false teeth and stays, and the unsavory apparatus of an ancient buck's dressingroom. Dr. Johnson has summed up his book for us as containing the manners of a dancing-master and the morals of a less reputable profession, and wegenerally accept thejudginent. Yet if Lord Chesterfield was rather unlike a prophet or an apostle of a new faith, he had a queer sort of gospel to deliver to his age and what is in its way amusing and gives sometimes an involuntary humorous turn to his lucubrations, is that in his mind it is obviously identified with the teaching more generally accepted as a sacred revelation. He is fond of quoting,

giving the weight

of his aristocratic patronage to the precept about doing to others as you would that they should do to you. He heartily approves of the sentiment, and indeed presents his own lessons chiefly

practical conclusions from it.

Hut of course, in the seventeen centuries which had elapsed since the promulgation of that command, it had come to need a good many comments and corollaries. Now and then it wanted patchings but he wassublimely unconscious that the text ever came into conflict with the notes, or that, like other judicial interpreters, he was materially altering tlie law which he professed to administer. The whole theory is admirably given in one of his letters. "Do as you would be done by!" he exclaims at the opening, with an unction which would befit an eloquent pulpit orator. But presently the maxim takes a queer turn. What all men would like done to them he explains, is to have their ruling passions gratified now the ruling passion of all kings and women and

1

lo to be always tickling each other's vanity. Nor can wo be too thoughtful and delicate in our attentions. Labor to Ann out those little weaknesses which may be discovered in every one. Tell Cardinal Richelieu that he is the best poet of his timo assure Sir Robert Walpole that he has a polite and happy turn to galluntry though you know very well that ho has "undoubtedly less than any man living." Swear to ugly women, for they will always believe it, that they are beautiful, or, at loast have "a certain jenrnuiJtquoi still more engaging than autv." Compliment a beautiful wornen'on her understanding, and your pruisos will have the charm of hoveltv. Practice especially that "innocont piece of art," flattering people behind their backs, in presence of somebody who is- sure to make his court bv repeating your words "This is, of all flattery," be adds—and the remark is certainly well founded—"the most pleasing and most effectual." By such acts you will be able, as he remarks in an unwonted access of plainspeaking, to "insinuate and wriggle vourselt into favor" at court. "Wng"gling," it must bo granted, is rather a coarse term to express this delicate system of rising in the world but, as a rule, there is something pleasant In the charming sincerity of his conviction that he is really preaching a lofty code of morality. 1 Ie does not mean, he declares, to recommend "abject aud criminal flattery." By no means. Vices are to bo abhorred and discouraged and moreover, when they are coarse they are generally unsuccessful. The pith of this corollary to the gospels consists in drawing the delicate lino between si initiation "and dissimulation in hitting off the method of deceiving without lying in soothing instead of sickening, with praise and, in short, in safely reaching by honorable means the ends which a clumsy knave fails to secure by blundering "into downright dishon esty. The necessary qualification for effecting this purpose is the possession of those graces on which his lordship is perpetually harping. Good breeding mav

defined as the art of delicate

llatterv,

and if not virtue itself, is its

most necesisary ingredient. "Intrinsic merit"will "gain you the general es teem of all, but not the particular affection of any." The "respectable Hottentot" who "heaves his meat anywhere but down his throat the man who drawls, or splutters, or comes into a room awkwardly who twirls his hat or scratches his head when he is talking to you, may be a saint, a patriot or a philosopher, but he won't be liked at court. The rules themselves, which the old sage works out with infinite variety of detail, are generally sound enough, and genetally full of shrewdness, though we rather wonder at times that they shonld be necessary. A young entleinan, we may hope, would scareerequire at the present day to be reminded a down times over of the importance of washing his teeth. The most unlucky and best-remembered maxim Is the assertion that nothing is so "illiterate and ill-bred as audible laughter:" laughter is tlie manner in which the mob express their silly at siilv things, and they call It bei merrv." This is a little too much tor

coat: bin. «s a rule, we may granting the leading principles, the jualcio code laid down is judicious. Assume that Hi® main object of a man's life should be to win a blue riband, which Ixrd Chesterfield's admiring biographer proclaims to have been the one ambition ot his hero suppose that this worthy ol jeet is to ie gained by favor at court and, finally, that favor at court is to be won ~by flattery—and there is something to be said on behalf

4

of each of these propositions, and we may grant that the noble moralist's heio laid down a very accurate chart of the rocks on which a youthful aspirant may suffer ship-wreck. It must, indeed, be confessed that this view of human life is rather oddly grated upon Christian morality and it is probable that Lord Chesterfield would hardly have fouud himself at home with that perfect gentleman, as Coleridge cailea him, St. Paul. The devil, however, can quote Scripture, and it would be hard if that privilege were denied to an eminently respectable British peer.

The Oornhill Magazine.

JQAQUIN MILLER, THE NEW CALIFORNIA POET. An old schoolmate of Joaquin Miller, the new California poet, contributes to the Washington Sunday Morning Chronicle the following curious sketches of his lite:

The new California ooet, John Miller, as lie is called, who is creating a sensation in English literary circles and rewiving the commendations of the Times, AtheiHcum, Pall Mull Gazette, and the Globe, is an Oregonian, and his real name is C. Hiner Miller. His father, Hulins Miller, settled with his family—wife, four sons and a daughter —near the town of Eugene City, in Lane count3', Oregon, nearly twenty years ago, when the subject of this sketch was a boy. Hiner went to California, probably' in 1S4S, and spent a short tiiife in the mines near Yr^ka, whore it was reported that he got into a difficulty and shot at the ^he 1 of Siskiyou county. On returning iionic lie attended school in Eugene City until some time in 1860, and was in the same class as the writer of this article, lie then spent about a year in eastern Oregon and what is now Idaho, running a pony express and carrying letters and papers from the nearest postofflce, a distance of two or three hundred miles over the mountains, and through the Indian country, to the miners. Again he returned home, and for a short time during the early part of the war of the rebellion, he edited the Eugene City Review a Democratic paper, and as the writer of this was editing the Republican paper there at the time he has a distinct remembrance of a fierce war of words. Soon after this he married Miss Minnie Myrtle, a young lady who acquired a reputation as a writer of verses. He then went east of the Cascade Mountains with his j^oung wife, and settled in the gold mining camp of "Canyon City," on John Day's river, in the new county of Grant, where ho put out his shingle as an "attorney-at-law." He ^Mas soon afterwards elected Courj

sprijjgk^jsjV h« accumulatea^CtKiwwri^me money, and published in the local newspaper, from time to time, apart of the poems which he lias since published iu liobdon. Last spring he came back to his old home at Eugene City, separated from his wife, leaving her and two little children provided for, and on June (ith 1870, the day of our State election, he left the Willamette Valley for Europe, and was, I believe, the Paris correspondent of a leading New York paper during the Franco German war. His last production before leaving the Pacific was a parting farewell to his wife, entitled "Myrr," *nd was addressed to

M. M. M."—Mhltiio Myrtle Miller. It was published over his signature on the 11th of June, a few days after his departure (he carrying away an advance proof sheet), in the Oregon Stale Journal, which, although Republican, was the paper he selected as the medium of most of his publications, as his father, brothers, and nearly all ot his warmest personal friends were of that school of politics. To this production his wife published a reply in verse, soon after his departure, in which she criticised him in severe terms. One of his brothers, Drt John D. Miller, loft Oregon to serve In the Union army in Virginia, and now resides in Kaston, Pennsylvania. His other brothers and arents are still residing near Eugene ,'aile

„ity, in the beautiful valley of the Willamette, and his only sister, Ella, died in that placo a feV months ago. It was reported that hh became acquainted with Miss Myrtl* by seeing her verses in print, and cotanicnced corresponding with her befrre they had seen each other. Then he galled at her home, on Coos Bav the fi^st time another gentleman who wnsipaving his addresses to Miss M., happened to be in the house whereupon Hiner introduced himself by dniwitga revolver and driving his rival fintn the room. They were then marritfl and went to Eugene Citv. Perhaps tlerc is some truth in this because in ler reply, Mrs. M. M. M. reproaches h»n for coldness and neglect, after haUng driven her lover from her presenoeUml separated them forever, lie is a*Impulsive and reckless as Byron, bu| is a true and noble friend. In his f*ewell he predicted that he Avould h»vd"a name among the princely few," wht'h may vot le verified.

R- K-

A MrsirAL cdmibser of Paris was obliged recently, irtthe hurry of his departure, to the unfinished score of a compJsUi«i behind. When the War was over h«lrcturned with intense anxiety for thl fate of his precious manuscript. Ot one wall of his house was standing, ut high up on its side could be seen tt cupboard, with its key still projectin from the lock, In which was deposited the valuable paper. A ladder was *ucured, the impatient composer attended and took oat his treasure safe Jjd sound. What was his astonishmentlo find it not only safe but complied, the composition brought to a h.-ipy close, with a brief note of expknation, signed, Koennemann, musici«-in-chief of the Twenty-Thin! line reflment.

A LOTTO TIMITBKTIKKN SWF.ARS.-

from Ijondou: "lhaV not heard profane oath since I laklod, on the th of June, at Queenstow*, eighteen days sso." To a man who p»s been a good while in Congrtts, tlit must, indeed, seem an infernally lolg time between oaths.—Lrmwrillt Oirry Journal,

THE

guileless are iu«Uly without

suspicion, but the di^onest man always suspects others.

ptmui

.j

AMERICAN LOVE OF TITLES. On an average, seventv-five per cent, of the American people are Judges, Deacons,' Professors, Captains, Honorables, Generals, Colonels, or Majors. Our Revolutionary forefathers—without allusicn to whom no editorial is complete—fought, bled and voted for every President since Washington, in order to achieve a republic of equality, where there should ba no Dukes and Kings and Lords to fatten upon the balance of society, but we have become afflicted with titles beyond any monarchical precedent. Does this not indicate infallibly that we are drifting, under Radical misrule, into imperialism—infallibly enough, that is, to warrant Mr. Storey in penning one of his most characteristic tirades? No American is happy without a title. These titles may be clivided into two great classes—the Legitimate and the Illegitimate and the second division is by far the most numerous. In the first place, all clergymen, school-teach-ers, barbers, artists, chirophodists, piano-pounders, horse-doctors, magicians, and other humbugs are Professors. Every mud-scow, tug-boat and canal-barge turns out as many Captains as Amherst University does LIA D's. Each country tanner and store-keeper who has attained the age of forty is breveted a Deacon. \,A11 lawyers become Judges—indeod#connection with the legal profession is not considered indispensible or even necessary for popular elevation to the judiciary. All Ex-Governors are Governors for life, and defeat for a Lieutenant Governorship is held to qualify a man mid his heirs male to the third generation for gubernatorial distinction, Honorables swarm so abundantly that all public officials, whether National, State or local, in office or out, are dubbed "Hon." The presidency of an agricultural society, the editing of a country paper, and the successful management of a hotel are generally held to confer the title. But when we reach the army we are amazed beyond measure at the number of officers of exalted rank. Generals, Colonels, Majors, and Captains abound as egregiously as Kings did in the age of Abraham, when that eminent filibusterer went out with his servants and killed about twenty-two of them before breakfast. There is no popular recognition of any rank below that of Captain. It would be an interesting study, could any one trace the career of suclfa hero from grade to grade. His Captain's commission was acquired when he drove a stage-coach. Rising in life to the position of chief engineer in a rural bepzinery, he became Major. His employor dying he became a hasharchitect, and proprietor of a rural bugroest, Then he .was .gazetted Colonel, olonel he remained until he "re-*

in for politics, usury and real estate. The fact Is that such an eruption of titles has broken out over our smiling land, that the plain "Mr." is as extinct as the Do-Do. We are all, all honorable men. In one way, perhaps, wo can utilize this nuisance. An income tax on titles, assessing a Captain at $10 a year and higher grades at a proportionally higher figure, would, it is calculated, yield enough in fourteen years to pay off the national debt, pension off all the Dents, build a school-house and gin-mill in every townshjp, and purchase several more Alaskas. If this is considered impracticable, we might have a law introduced making the assumption of all titles criminal, and the killing of all Honorables, Doctors of Law and Divinity, Professors, Captains, Majors, Colonels, Deacons, Generals, Judges, and Governors justifiable homicide. A bounty might be offered for their scalps, after the Arizonian manner, and the cheering spectacle would be afforded us of running Deacon Bross with dogs, or bringing down the Hon. Josef Medill with a shotgun, as he sat in his counting-house counting out the in ney he appropriated from the National Treasury for his ten days' Washingtonian sojourn.—Chicago Republican.

ONE'S FRIENDS.

1

Monev can buy many things, good and evil. All the wealth of the world could not buy you a friend, nor pay you for the loss o'fone. "I have wanted only one thing to make mo happy," Hazlitt writes "but, wanting that, have wanted everything." And again: "My heart, shut up in the prison-house of this rude clay, has never found, nor will it ever find, a heart to speak to."

We are the weakest of spendthrifts if we let one friend drop off through inattention, or let one push away another, or if we hold aloof from one for petty jealousy or heedless slight or roughness. Would you throw away a diamond because it pricked you? One good friend is not to be weighed against jewels of the earth. If there Is coolness or all unkindness between: us, let us come face to face aud have it out. Quick, before love grows cold "Life is too short to quarrel In," or to carry black thoughts of friends. If I was wrong, I am sorry if you, then I am sorrier yet, for snould I not grieve for my friend's misfortune? and the mending of your fault does not lie with me. But the forgiving it does, and that Is the happier office. Give me your hand and 11 it e'

call it even. There! it is gone and I thank kind Heaven I keep my friend still! A friend is too precious a thing to be lightly held, but it must be a little heart that cannot find room for more than one or two. The kindness I feel for you warms me toward all tho rest, makes me long to do something to make you all happy. It Is easy to lose a friend, but a new one will not come for calling, nor make up for the old one when he comes.

SAJCTANA

"•f« happj I big lr

is a big Injun, but he is a

great coward. Sentence of death was passed upon him in a Texas court some days since, and he got down on his knees and prayed for mercy. lie said, if they would only let him go this time, he would be forever peaceful, and he would, besides kill with his own hands the Kiowa chiefs who warred against the white man. His proper business in this emergency was to draw himself contemptuously up anil remark that he wasn't afraid—that In all probability it would blow over—that the court which tried and sentenced him was actuated by base considerations, «£c. But the big Injuns of the great We*t are not in painful moments as aro the njiiitoo: New York city.

Price Five Cents*

SLEEr TALKERS.

An additional element of interest is presented in those cases in which speaking is concerned, the somnambulist'' either talking or hearing what is said to others. Many writers mention the instance of a naval officer, who was signal lieutenant to Lord Hood, when the British fleet was watching To«lor, He sometimes remained on deck eight- it eon or twenty hours at a time, watching for signals from the other ships ho would then retire to his cabin, and fkll into asleep so profound that no ordinarv voice-could wake him but if the word "signal''was even whispered in his ear, he was roused instantly. Dr. James Gregory cites the case of a youiijf :•.•••••••• military officer, going with his reginient in a troop ship to a lorcign station in 1758, who, when asleep, was peculiarly sensitive to the voice of his familiar

When

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acquaintances, and powerfully influenced by anything they said to him. $ Sonic of "the other young ofiicorsj ready tor any pranks, would lead htm on throngii all the stages of a duel, or of**4 an impending shipwreck, or of a san-i, guinarv battle each sentence spoken by them turning his dream (if it may be called a dieaiii) into a particular di reel ion until at length he would start up in imaginary danger, and, perhaps-. awake by falling out of his berth or stumbling over a rope. In 1815. public attention was called to the case of a young girl who sometimes fell asleep in the evening, began to talk, imagined herself to be a clergy mail, uttered an extempore prayer, sang a livinn much better than she was accustomed to do-' at church, carried on rational discourse, and knew nothing about it when she woke. tie of the somnambulists, or rather sleep-tnlkors, who have come under tho notice of physicians, was a young lady accustomed to talk after she td been asleep an hour or two. If leading questions were put to her by any one in the room, she would narrate all" the events of the preceding day buther mind, sloeping or waking as we i, may choose to consider it, disregarded' all "questions or remarks except such as belonged directly to tho train of thought.

she "awoke, she knew?

nothing of what had occurred. The Times, in 182$, gave an amusing account of tho somnambulism of onet-1 George Davis, a youth in tho service of.s ™fill butcher in Lambeth. He fell asleep in his chair one Sunday evening soon after he rose up iu his sleep, with his eyes closed, fetched his whip, put to a a to find tlio saddle, and got up on the unsaddled horse. Some members of the'. family, watching him, asked what he« was about to do he answered that h8

i,

was "going his rounds.." With soine di/ficulLy they stopped him but could41

A GOOD STORY OF DUKE WIN. The Now Orleans Timea is responsible for tho following:

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not stop his train of thought for a"Cored into awrauglo with an imaginftVy titffipike man frr giving hi ni short,. change, saying, "Let's have none of", a A niountod, ho whipped and spurred vig-' orously as if really going his rounds.

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In our chapter oil duelling in lasfe Monday's Mosaic, we omitted an amusing incident which occurred a good many years ago between two men in Mississippi, whose names have sinco be-« come historical in tho annals of this country. Wo refer to Robert.I. Walker and Dr. Win. M. Gwin, Duke or Sonora. An altercation occurred between them which led to a ohallongo from Mr.. Walker. Walker was a man of remarkably diminutive size, while the,.. Doctor towered Like a giant, with the brawn and bone of a London |orter.. Walker was bent on fighting but the, Doctor, who was naturally a jovial and kind hearted soul, did not feel at all. aggrieved toward his adversary.

Be that as it might, tho Doctor accepted the challenge*, and chose tho In-ik, dian war-tomahawk as his wcapon..i The terms were so arranged that on a given day tho combatants were to be posted one hundred and fifty yards apart, and, at a given signal, to rush past each other like knights in a tourney, flinging their tomahawks In theicv course.

The Doctor caused It to be bruited abroad that he practiced every day in ai?i, savannah, a few miles away from the town whore both resided. Piqued with, curiosity, Mr. Walker allowed himself ',' to be persuaded to visit tho sjiot sur-, reptitlously, and view tho achievementsof his antagonist. Not so surreptitiously, however, that Dr. Gwin was., not aware whoso pryingeyes were fixed* upon liis movements.

Measuring off one hundred and fifty paces from the solitary stump of a pi no tree, the doctor bounded with a spring and a yell that would have delighted. Chingahook, the venerable padro of the last oi tho Mohicians his tomahawk, poised high in tho air, a grin of demonlac ferocity lighting up his strongly marked features. As ho neared the stump he projected the missile with a powerful sweep of his arm, clean up to tho handle In the soft pine, and panting, came to a dead halt.

Then? was something so ludicrously savage in this that Mr. Walker and his companion burst Involuntarily Into a fit or laughter from their ambush. The laugh betrayed them a reconciliation took place, and up to the breaking out.,. of the Confederate war, and It may be, up to Mr. Walker's death, they were fast friends.

A LJTTI.Bgirl came into ray house one day, anil some apple {wirings lay on a nuite on the table. After sitting ,^., awhile she said: "I smell apples!" "Yes," I replied, "I guess you smell those parings on the plate." "No! no!" said she, "Taln't them I smell I smell whole apples."

THR

eldest son of the Laird who built

the Confederate steamer Alabama Is' about to marry a young Welsh ladv named Pritohard, who lives at Llwv-*: diarth Regab, in Llanerehyrnedd, North Wales. And thus tho sins ot the fath^ era are visited upon the children.

THE

Virginia papers are beginning

to ridicule tho tournament nonsenvc, with which rho young chivalry have been wont to am'use tnoniMilves.

TLI'»

gallant "knights" arc affectionately advised to stop their Infernal fooling and go to work.